The library plot

Raise your hand if you find it hard to find friends these days. Is it just me? Where was I when they were handing out the friendship bracelets?
 Oh, that's right, I was moving every other year as an Army wife....I was so blessed during all those years that I can now count a best friend in almost every post...so my besties are now spread across the country. Which is great and all...but some times you want someone to look you in the eye across the table and be all, "you have baby snot on your sweater...deal with that situation."

But now that I find myself in a less and less military environment, i.e. everyone else isn't in the same boat, I'm starting to realize that its a stone-cold world out there where apparently everyone else has already made out their BFF list and there are no blank spaces ( Oh, wait, is that why I don't have friends? That I just put in a Taylor Swift reference and no one notice?!?)

Annnnywho, something funny happened this year that I just HAVE TO TELL YOU.. I was visiting my home town and enjoying some Mommy time with my sister and our kids. We'd just attended a super disappointing story time at the local library and were now letting our kids run havoc at a nearby gym when another mom approached us. We made conversation and within minutes she was getting my sisters details.  And I was super impressed/jealous. I'd been trying to break into the Mommy scene at my own local libraries, parks, mall play areas and chickfilas and I'd gotten NADA. And here my sister was scoring a new friend in MINUTES. Whaaaaaa?!?!
But, within hours my sister texted me to say that the "new friend" had added her on Facebook and low and beyond she was one of those "sellers"....you know, one of those chicks that "works from her home" by throwing parties, doing before and afters on her fb page and making her instagram a variable who's who of giveaways...you know the girl.*
And in that moment we both knew it was a sham. It turned out it WASN'T any easier in my sister's town than in mine, she'd just come in contact with a chick who needed a few more buyers for her monthly balance.

We laughed, we made some jokes to make us feel better and we returned to our lives of wiping snot and packing cheerios to go.

AND THEN....I was at my own local library ( why is it always the library?!?! Is it in a handbook or something!??) and I started to make conversation with a girl who was also in the kids section with her own littles. And I was super excited and surprised at how receptive she was! She didn't respond in one word responses and she didn't exit for "nap time" at the first opportunity, in fact, SHE quickly asked for MY number! "Wow!" I thought, I've finally done it! I've finally made another mommy friend "Out in the wild."

And then. AND THEN. She actually CALLED ME. Like within the first 24 hours! CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS!?!? I was shocked  and not a little bit flattered. I had clearly rocked the library banter and she was wanting more! Sadly I was at one of those inflatable lands where kids jump around on giant balloons and us parents stand around and pray that it gets all the energy out so that we all get to sleep in the next day.... SO I couldn't hear her call and so I called her back as soon as I could....annnnnnd I got her voice mail....annnnnd it went something like this:

"You've reached SO and So, your friendly neighborhood Blah-blah consultant! I can't come to the phone right now but leave a message, I'll get back to you!!! BEEEEEEEEP"

And so I knew it had happened.

I had been duped. I had fallen for the ol' library friend scam.
 So when, a few weeks later and I'd actually ignored the earlier warning signs and actually met for a play date and then a few days later I was politely propositioned to "throw a fun party for all my friends where we could sell a little blah blah!" I knew I only had myself to blame.

Of course, the joke was firmly on the fake friend....I didn't have any friends to invite to such a party, so HA HA! JOKES ON YOU GIRL!

So there it is. There's my warning/plea. I am going to continue to try to make Friends out there in the world ( outside of  the comfy Military bubble) and hopefully one day I'll actually meet someone who thinks me and my ( ADORABLE AND ENTERTAINING and MOSTLY WELL BEHAVED) littles are worth hanging out with, and that I won't have to buy a product for them to think so.


* P.S. I actually have friends who sell all kinds of great products from their home. Beachbody, DoTerra, Mary Kay...you name it! And many of you have asked me to buy your products and/or throw a party...and I've LOVED supporting you...this is no way a judgment on you or your businesses. I respect your willingness to get out there and make some monies...I also doubt you do anything like this story to make said money so don't worry, this isn't about you! :-) xox