September 06, 2006

you.

So, I was driving home tonight around 9pm....with my windows down...listening to Frank Sinatra. It was fabulous. I could have just kept driving if I hadnt been so tired. ;-)

My father is obviously a hobbit deep down inside, because he gave ME a present today! Frank Sinatra's "best CD" In the wee small hours..
And i have to say...its pretty awesome. Apparently, it was the very first "concept" album.....and it really is that good.

Tonight, I couldnt WAIT to come home, because, well....I really like my home. Its pretty fantastic. And it got me thinking about how easy it was for me to make the transition from living with others to living. all. alone.

Lonely is an interesting concept. And the words been turning up in lots of conversations lately....
I am definitely NOT lonely at the moment, and yet there is still this underlying push towards companionship. Does that make any sense? Basically, I'm totally happy-but by habit...or some other unknown reason I am constantly worrying myself with the possibility that one day I will end up all sad and LONELY ( there's that word again). Tonight, it just kind of hit me ( like a brick) that things are actually JUST FINE...and that things are just how they should be for now....I should enjoy this.

I have this friend who I absolutely adore. I watch this friend from a distance, I live through my friends communication with me...their day, their struggles, their victories...and I gotta say, its better than ANY book I've ever read! I find myself getting excited about future days-I sort of see ahead to what I just KNOW God is going to do next...but most of all I wonder if my friend realizes how fantastic TODAY actually was? I wonder if my friend sees the obvious revelations of God in the very circumstances of the day to day? I get the reenactment of the day via email-and i sit, enchanted at my computer....practically opened mouthed....because God is THAT evident.
But, you know what? While I really am thinking of a specific person here, and while I really thought about naming names...I realized that actually the name was completely interchangable. It could just as easily be you.
It could just as easily be me.

I get SO caught up thinking about tomorrow, or even more so...thinking about a TINY portion of today...that I forget to look at what's REALLY there.


Oh Jesus, your fingerprints are all over this one...

No comments: