September 30, 2010

Cliff's Notes

So, tonight I discovered that I could add pages to my blog ( you're all probably saying something like, "duh!"... But let's bare in mind I'm still relatively sleep deprived, therefore slow.) and so I got very excited and decided to put together a list of "must read" blog posts. I've often lost sleep at night ( ha!) at the thought that someone might stumble upon my blog and, having not read the previous 1,800 and something posts ( no really... I'm THAT prolific!) they will not have any context clues on which to base this blog... How sad for them. And so, I am slowly making a little stock pile of posts that will give much needed perspective to this blog-the Cliff Notes- if you will...
So, go check it out and feel free to let me know if I've left out something good.

September 29, 2010

20/20 vision

So, first off...and this will have nothing to do with the rest of the post, but Ransom slept NINE HOURS LAST NIGHT!!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! ( And with only one feeding in the middle...)
And this same child has been napping like a CHAMP all day!! Seriously, Sleep Training, I will SO write a glowing review of you if you asked...

Ok, now on to my post:

So, this afternoon I was headed out the door to make the loooong trek to Babies R Us to buy more bags for my Diaper Pail ( seriously, my child is the poopiest child ever...and this pail has been a LIFE SAVER!)-which incidentally, we did not make it to Babies R Us, because Ransom started crying soon after we left Fort Benning and I was faced with a HUGE, GIANT traffic jam, and so I took the nearest exit, made a big loop -came home and bought my diaper bags online...they will arrive on Friday and I will not have to have a screaming child in the car for any length of time. WIN.
Ok, wait, that's not where this was going...ok, right, I was headed out the door and I grabbed the mail and noticed a letter from Brett! YAY! And as I was grabbing the mail and heading to the car I heard the little beeping sound on my phone that lets me know I have a voice mail....and so that is how I got the WONDERFUL news from our dear friend Charlie, that Brett passed BOTH OF HIS PATROLS in the Mountain Phase of Ranger School!!! 
I was SO excited! And it made having to drive in a giant loop with a crying baby TOTALLY bareable. And so, when I got home from my totally pointless outing, I read Brett's letter-which he started with, "I'm pretty sure I didn't get a Go on my first patrol." And then he proceeded to tell me all the things he felt he'd done wrong over the last few days. But, you know what? I had already gotten the phone call from Charlie, and I ALREADY KNEW that each and every one of those mistakes that Brett had supposedly made had been covered up by Grace! And that's when I thought-I bet this is how God feels....I mean, don't get me wrong I am NOT equating myself to God, haha! But what I am saying is that how often am I bumming around, thinking how awful things are going ( for instance Ransom crying for days on end and me wondering if I was being a good Mom or if I was setting my child up for a life time of therapy) and God is shaking His head at me wondering when I'm going to remember that my life is covered by His Grace. That His mercy is FAR reaching...when am I going to have faith that He really DOES work all things for Good!?! And so it was kind of cool to have 20/20 vision of Brett's circumstances...to hear his perspective already knowing how it was going to end. But, maybe I need to have that kind of calm and peace going into ALL of our situations-since, its the same God working it all out-whether I know how or not!
So, in this instance it was nice knowing how the chapter ended, but I hope I have that same peace going into the Florida phase where I do NOT know the end result...

September 28, 2010

A baby and a bear's butt

So, it hasn't even been a WEEK yet of "sleep training" ( a.k.a torture for parents with ears) and things are already looking up for those who have to live with Ransom ( me).

Its actually pretty cute that I would say 65.9 percent of the time ( a percentage that I just made up because it sounded about right) when you put him down for his nap, all swaddled and with his pacifier, he immediately turns his little head and sticks it into the butt of his stuff bear and closes his eyes for about two seconds and then opens them up again as if to say, "nope! I'm not tired!! I won't be sleeping!" But, that two second snuggle with the bear butt is the dead give away that as soon as I walk away he's going to be out. And THAT'S SERIOUSLY WONDERFUL.

Incidentally, the bear butt thing...Ransom didn't come up with it on his own. I started sticking the stuffed bear up close to Ransom's face to "keep the pacifier in"-because that's what good mother's do....and now I think its actually part of our sleep ritual. hahaha!


Anyway, I wouldn't say we've got this sleeping thing down or this schedule thing down...but we're getting there and all the smiles and half laughs I'm getting from Ransom during his awake time is the sure sign that we're on the right track.

So, sigh....I'm sure I'm going to need another pep talk from one of you Mom's again in a few days when Ransom is screaming his head off for the fifty-millionth hour in a row...but I thought I'd take this moment  when Ransom DID go RIGHT DOWN for his nap with a sigh and a bear butt snuggle  to write a post...so I could look back at it and be reminded that while this whole parenting thing seems like a real shot in the dark most days- SOMETIMES it pays off.

Added Note: For those concerned, Ransom's bear is NOT cover his air passages..and it usually doesnt stay by his face for long ( he's a pretty active when he sleeps)-and don't worry I check on him and move it if it DOES seem to stay by his face longer than it should! :-)

September 25, 2010

A hard chocolate outer shell

An open letter:
I know it may seeeeem that I know what I'm doing, or strike that ( because it probably doesn't) or that I am confident in my parenting choices... But I'm not and I literally pray all the time that God would give me more wisdom and guidance, and shoot if He'd just send me a memo... Or even a status update would do... SOMETHING to assure me that I'm doing the right thing with my son....
This is all wrapped up in how much I miss Brett, at least then there would be two of us to blame for our bad parenting decisions. But, since it's just me, remember dear friends- I welcome your advice and comments, but tread lightly.... Under that hard outer shell I've got a layer that easily melts.

September 24, 2010

Fussy, Table for two

So, about a week ago I started to notice that Ransom was getting increasingly fussy when it came to going down for his nap or for bedtime. It seemed that no matter what I did he would fight sleep like it was going out of style and so he and I would spend most of the day struggling against each other in the hopes for him to catch a few winks.

Not a happy baby. Not a happy mommy.

And so we've begun "sleep training" basically the idea is that he'll learn how to go to sleep by himself and therefore he'll get MORE sleep and thus be a much happier baby and then I will be a much happier mommy.

At least that is the hopes. Things were really going well last night and up until this afternoon. In fact, he was doing so well that I noticed a marked difference in Ransom's attitude...he was a down right smiley baby! That's what I'm talking about! I don't think I've ever seen him smile so much! It was great fun!

And so as I listen to my little boy cry in the other room...with my phone on timer so that I can run in there as SOON as the timer says enough time has passed ( believe me this is HARD!), I believe that I am doing the right thing for him..he will ultimately be a happier baby and I so want that for him!

But this is hard, and its especially hard when I don't have my hubby around to help me through it-so it was nice that God reminded me of a verse last night to help me through...actually, Brett reminded me of the verse first-its actually the verse that he's memorizing while in Ranger School-so its kinda cool that its helping us BOTH.

Prov 3:12
because the LORD disciplines those he loves, 
       as a father  the son he delights in.

September 23, 2010

This post is brought to you by the letter A

A is for adrenaline. The adrenaline that comes from only getting 5 hours of sleep ( spread out in 1 hour and half hour increments) and then the adrenaline that comes from running around trying to get as MANY errands done as I possibly could while Ransom was chillin' with my friend Marie. 

This is the same Adrenaline that is now causing me to not be able to sleep during this precious "nap time". Darn it. But I guess that's ok because it means I'm able to write you this wonderful post, RIIIIIGHT?!?

A is for Aden & Anais who make the GREATEST swaddle blankets in the world. Seriously. I was given a set of these babies as a gift before Ransom was born and I recently ordered some more because I literally used all three of the ones I had EVER. SINGLE. DAY. 

They are light weight-perfect for living in the south. They are huge-perfect for covering up the carseat at a spur of the moment, perfect for covering up mommy when feeding and PERFECT for swaddling-because somehow these blankets can stretch tighter than any other blanket I've found and not leave Ransom strangled or overly hot. 



A is for Aunt Donnave who's coming to visit on Saturday. I'm so excited to see her! I know we're going to have great fun with my spoiled son who refuses to fall asleep unless he is held. This habit must end. So Aunt Donnave should get ready for a sound track of screaming. ;-) 


September 22, 2010

Ordering of the day

I remember when I was young and my parents would pray over breakfast and they would often say, "Lord, order the day for us."
I immediately envisioned me at a fast food restaurant menu and then Jesus jumping in front of me and ordering me something I hadn't thought to ask for...

Well, that's pretty much what I think it means, even now...and I'm often delighted when my "perfectly planned" day turns out to be waaay different. Like today, for instance, today I was starting the morning off slow, Ransom was eating and I got a phone call from my wonderful Mother-in-law, Mary. We ended up talking for about 45 minutes and even praying together at the end. It was SO encouraging to me to hear how she's been praying for Brett and it reminded me how the Holy Spirit has given so many different people, in completely different places some of the same specific prayers for B. Pretty awe inspiring! She also shared some stories about Brett from his childhood and she mentioned how his heart was "tender" for the Lord even back then. It was an interesting word choice, but one that Brett and I have actually used in our prayers for Ransom-even before he was born. I think one of my greatest hopes is that Ransom's heart will be soft and malleable towards the Lord and from an early age he will see his great need for Christ....essentially I hope he's like his Daddy!
Anyway, my conversation with Mary was like a big gulp of cool refreshing water-and after getting off the phone I remember that the previous night I had been feeling rather lonely and down...and here I was getting an encouraging phone call the very next morning!
It was also great to hear from Mary, because I've definitely missed her-she came to visit only two weeks ago but it seems like AGES! It was such a blessing having her here and getting to share a little bit of Brett and my life with her! It was pretty amazing how God once again "ordered" things so that Mary was even here when Brett had his 8 hour pass so she got to see her son! And of course, I had tons of fun staring at Ransom and discussing all the various ways in which he is superior to all other babies. Nanas are good for things like that ;-)


And so my morning whizzed by, and I was just sitting down to feed Ransom again before heading off to a Doctors appointment when the door bell rang and then rang again...and then I heard the door OPEN! So I unattached myself from my child and hurried to see who was there...and it was my downstairs neighbors!! We have seriously lived in this house for HOW many months now and we've been TERRIBLE about getting to know our neighbors...but TODAY of ALL DAYS they decide to break the trend and drop by! They were terribly sweet and even brought diapers and baby wipes for Ransom and so there in that moment I had to just toss my plans of having a perfectly fed and calm baby for my Doctors appointment out the window. I also had to toss my plans of going to the post office to mail Brett's box ( we'll just have to pray that one day doesn't make a difference!) and instead enjoy getting to meet my sweet neighbors. Sometimes I need to learn to be more flexible....

September 21, 2010

Tv and fire

So, did you know you could stream movies and TV shows to your iPhone with Netflex?! 
Well, I didn't until about a month ago... And now my middle of the night  feedings are a lot more interesting.... So far this week ( starting on Saturday because that's how I start my weeks, ok?)
I've watched the Veggie Tales Movie: Johan, which I watched to recover from watching the show The Riches which turned out to be too dark for my taste.. And now I'm having a Prison Break revival starting with season one. Gosh I loved this show when it first came out... I distinctly remember watching it late at night on DVD waiting for Brett to call me from Washington when he'd get off work, back when we were dating... Gotta love long distance relationships ;-) 

In other news I went shopping today to buy things on Bretts wishlist to send in his care package ( incidentally, I think ive more than covered all his wishes and I feel sure that he won't be able to remotely finish all the food in the time try given him- you don't get to keep your packages and they only give you so long to eat the content...BUT if any of you are heartset on sending him a package, feel free to fill a box with yummy treats and I'm sure Brett will share with other starved ( I almost typed "half starved" just then... But that wasn't accurate) Rangers. After buying all his treats and calming my screaming child ( Ransom does NOT like the car seat) I then made more of my totally awesome White Chocolate Cranberry cookies for Bretts box... I also, because I am now the queen of multitasking ( see: the time I opened the mail while peeing)  I was also cooking black eyed peas for dinner... And SOMEHOW I caught a dish towel on fire on the blackeyed pea burner while taking the cookies out of the oven. It was very dramatic. But, the smoke alarms did not go off which I was torn over... On one hand... We could all die because of lack of alarm, but on the other hand it had take me forever to get my kid to sleep and SO HELP ME if an alarm woke him up...



September 20, 2010

Once again, with feeling

So, it was an odd sort of day here. For one thing Ransom was dealing with some serious gas issues and he "dealt" with his issues by declaring loudly how upset he was for most of the night and day. And I will admit that I didn't handle it super well... I'd say my lowest point was around 4:30am when I went growling into his room to retrieve him yet. again. Lack of sleep makes me embarrassingly short on patience. It is in fact true that being a parent reveals sooo many more things about myself that I need to work on. But, along with my shortcomings and R's sad tummy- a friend brought over some rice crispy treats ( apparently no one wants me to be skinny when Brett gets back!) and the mail brought with it a cute outfit for Ransom from his Aunt Anna and a gorgeous homemade garland from my friend Elaine- she also included a super encouraging verse as well... Plus another letter from Brett!! Two in a week!!! I feel so blessed!
So many prayers are being answered! Brett said he was dealing with the Instructors horrible treatment by remembering his memory verse ( the reference escapes me at the moment) that talks about the lord disciplining those He loves- it encourages me to know that the Word is ministering to Brett even in his sleep deprived state. Brett also mentioned he'd gotten several more letters from you wonderful friends and family! He said he is continually reminded that he is getting through ranger school because of your prayers.
Once again I am humbled by His faithfulness to us. And so with many pleading prayers that tonight will be better... I'm off to feed Ransom and then hopefully to sleep for a little while at least!

September 19, 2010

A major sell out

So, the other day I got a check in the mail...a check for 25 dollars. All because I went shopping. That's right, friends. I'm a major fan of online shopping and sending people presents straight from online stores-and so I was DE-LIGHTED when my friend Amy B. told me about ebates.com

Here's how it works. Think up a store that you'd like to visit...( there are hundreds to choose from so more than likely its there), saaaaay gap.com or 1-800flowers or diapers.com or nordstroms.com or boden.com or Ann Taylor Loft...those are just some of MY favorites, but I bet YOUR favorites are there too!
Anyway, just click on the link to your online store of choice and BAM! You've just earned back a percentage of whatever you're about to purchase!

Honestly, its some sort of magic, because I don't even KNOW how ebates tracks this stuff!

Anywho...for the most part I'm really lazy and that's why I hardly ever get behind cash back incentives ( for instance I tried to do the whole swag bucks thing but you're constantly having to jump through hoops to get any significant "bucks"...but EBATES...that's something I'm already doing! I'm ALREADY buying things! So I'm ALL ABOUT getting extra discounts!

So, if you too would like to save a little monies while shopping go sign-up for ebates RIGHT NOW:

And if you wouldn't mind terribly, use this little referral link so I could possibly win an ipad ( that is, if fifty of my readers click on it....so that would be AWESOME!)

Click here to get Abigail a ipad and also to save yourself some cash-o-la

What I learned...

So, first night of Ransom in his own room-done. It went pretty well, actually. I did, however, have to make sure he was pretty much fully asleep before leaving him in his crib. Otherwise it was a lovely back and forth and at 3:30am NOOOOBODY wants to be walking to and fro.

So, I learned one interesting fact-one of my downstairs neighbors snores so loudly that I can hear it in Ransom's room-he/she snored ALL NIGHT LONG and I must admit I was really jealous. It is odd that I can here it in Ransom's room and not mine. You would THINK that the snorer would be in the master bedroom and therefore directly under my room. Odd.

And those are my incredibly deep thoughts for the day.

This week I'm trying to cut down on sweets. Its near impossible considering the GIANT packages of Twizzlers Pull N' Peel that Amy B. sent me in the mail. *sigh*

September 18, 2010

Updates

So, dropped Carmi off at the shuttle to take her back to the airport and back to her grand adventure around the USA...I cannot tell you how lucky I feel that she spent a whole week with me. It was an absolute delight just to hang out with her day in and day out-with no plans or agenda hanging over us...it was awesome and I am sad to see the time end.

And now, now to another week with just me and Ransom. WOO! To review, the last time it was just Ransom and I for a week I was reduced to tears several times-and most of those times it was because of my great overwhelming gratitude to all those who came around me and supported me during that time. It was truly an incredible testimony of God's goodness to me. Of course, some of those times I was crying it was because I was totally and completely overwhelmed-but hopefully ( HA!) Ransom and I have both grown up a tad in the past two weeks and we'll now be much more capable of hanging out just the two of us....and just to add an element of surprise and suspense to the week I've decided to take this opportunity to move Ransom into his own room. DUH-DUH-DOOOOON.
I've noticed over this last week how much BETTER he sleeps when he's all alone in a room without anyone else in there-even breathing seems to bother him to some degree....and since he's also started to get waaay more vocal in his sleep I think that we'll both sleep better..or at least we will once I get over the extreme sense of anxiety I feel having him ALL THE WAY IN THE OTHER ROOM.

We'll see how it goes. I will like having all the baby stuff confined to its own room instead of half in my room, half in his room...that will be really nice.

And now to the really important part of this post:

I got a letter from Brett today! YAY! First of all, his address has changed-so take note of that ( I've decided to post Brett's address over in the side bar for easy access...), but don't worry he's gotten several of the letters that I and others have already sent so I don't think its a HUGE deal if you use the previously posted address...

Once again Brett is terribly sleep deprived and the letter was written over several days because he continued to fall asleep as he wrote it-at one point he had completely lost track of what day it was ( they had made him take his watch off). Also apparently the instructors in this phase have treated them much worse than they did in the previous phase. He said they enjoy doing "Ranger Games" which is apparently finding new and interesting ways to make the Ranger Students lives hell. It did seem like Brett was struggling to remain positive with this development but he was doing pretty well for the moment.
On a positive note, he had passed all of his tests so far and said that some of the things they were doing might even be considered "fun" if they weren't in Ranger School. Also, he had had an opportunity to talk to some of the guys in his squad about spiritual things even though Brett said he felt like he himself was not doing a very good job praying for opportunities...although, I personally feel like he should cut himself a break since he IS sleep and food deprived! But, that's why I love Brett he is constantly evaluating and trying to do better and I know that the Lord will continue to honor his heart for people. Please continue to pray for Brett and those around him! I KNOW the Lord is already answering those prayers that have already been lifted up! And I am continually encouraged when I think how the Lord has blessed us thus far. :-)

September 15, 2010

The joys of friendship

So, this week Carmi has been visiting me. Timing was delightful in that she is currently en route back to New Zealand from Europe and is taking the loooong way home by traveling around the USA on the way. And lucky for me she has a jam packed schedule and so having a week in the middle of her jam packed schedule where she does nothing was actually RIGHT UP her alley.

Thank goodness since we do nothing around here.

And so she's spent a goodly amount of time in my bed with Ransom and I, watching The Office and reading. We've slept late and taken walks in the evening and had prayer time. And today we celebrated Carmi's birthday ( which is tomorrow) by going out for the morning without Ransom. My wonderful friends Keri and Marie watched him for us and so I was able to indulge in a CAFFEINATED Latte...it was sooo goooood. **

And can I just say that it takes a special friendship that even after having not seen each other in THREE YEARS it has been terribly normal to see her again. Its just perfectly natural having her here. I am so blessed to have her as my friend.


** incidentally, I'm finishing this post at 1am because the fates are seriously laughing at me and that caffiene is keeping me wide awake when...1. My baby is sleeping and SO SHOULD I!! and 2. I'm exhausted.
awesome.

September 10, 2010

The shortest 8 hours EVER

So, I've gotta start this post off with a big thank you to my son who allowed me to sleep for FOUR HOURS IN A ROW last night. That's right. It was GLORIOUS.

Anyway, I hope we repeat that again tonight because Mommy had a BIG DAY today! Because, TODAY we got to see Brett!!! YAY!!

He got leave from noon to 8pm....Our dear dear friend Marie offered to do Brett's laundry for him which was a WONDERFUL blessing since he had a LOT of REALLY NASTY laundry to be done, and so instead of spending our day wrangling that- Brett was able to take a two and a half hour nap ( the poor guy had only gotten two hours of sleep the night before and not much more the previous few nights...seriously they are trying to kill him!) and eat pizza, cookies, peanut m&ms, an avacado ( random, but he wanted it!) and several cups of coffee, plus a roast beef dinner right before he had to go back. This did my heart good since he's already lost seven pounds in just these first three weeks... Of course, he also had to do annoying Ranger School related tasks like get another haircut ( aka shave his head) and buy EVEN MORE expensive Ranger School related gear ( honestly, if you want to make money go into the Ranger School gear selling business). But, it was ultimately a wonderful blessing to be able to spend any time with him. I have missed him so very very much.

Of course, it was also wonderful to see Brett with Ransom, it hurts my heart to think how much Brett is going to miss over the next two months but then again, there is still so much of Brett in Ransom even without Brett around...check out this gorgeous picture. Its seriously my favorite I've taken so far...because look how they are sleeping exactly the same!!! AWWW




And so I tried not to think about the hardships that Brett is about to face over these next weeks, or how much I'm going to miss him-instead I tried to soak up the goodness of these few moments together! I also have to admit I am soaking in the goodness of God that He got Brett through this first phase without a recycle (aka him having to do the phase again) or getting kicked out-no, He got us through and not just by the skin of our teeth! No, instead the Lord has shown us countless mercies these last three weeks and I know that He will not stop there.
I asked Brett if it was just as hard going back to Ranger School now as it was being dropped off three weeks ago, he said no. He said it was easier because now he knows the people he's working with-he says he generally likes his squad, he has now gotten through some of the toughest challenges ( that are in those first few days of ranger school) and he has also seen how faithful the Lord has been thus far and he knows that the Lord will continue to be faithful.

So, with that being said! Here's to the next three weeks! aka The Mountain Phase

You can write Brett letters at the following address:

Captain Brett Wilson
Roster #324
5th Ranger Training Battalion
3rd Sqd, 1st Plt Company C
ATTN: Class 10-10
1 Camp Merrill
Dahlonega, GA 30533-1802

Also, at the end of this phase he'll be able to receive packages so if you want to send a care package I'll give you some more details on that in a few weeks :-)
Brett has already received and enjoyed many of your letters and he mentioned many of them to me today. I cannot tell you how grateful I am to know that he's being reminded of all our love while he's dealing with so many harsh conditions. We are blessed!



September 08, 2010

With one hand tied behind my back...

I am going to attempt typing this with one hand...the other is occupied with patting my screaming baby...no one can accuse me of neglect! He gets my left hand! And since Im left handed, he's getting my very best!!

Anywho, today I got a letter from Brett!!!!! While it was not dated, I can semis that it was written over a week and a half! It was fairly informative, sounds like its more physically taxing than he remembers the first ( course, just like child birth, most pain is quickly forgotten!) And is having trouble with swelling in his hands and feet plus he is recovering from a fall where he injured a rib...
But, in all this I sensed a lightness in spirit, something that I also noticed when I got to see him on Saturday*...I can only attest this to all those who have been praying for him! He said he's gotten quite a few of your letters and that even though he doesn't get much time to "think" that when he does he is strengthened by the thought of all the support that we both have...and indeed we do! We are so very blessed!

Tomorrow we should find out if he passed his "peer review" ( think getting voted off the island...but even more brutal) and I believe that if he passes that then he'll officially have passed the first phase! PRAISE THE LORD!!! WOOOOO!

* So, on Friday I got a call from one of our friends who works at the Ranger Battalion and he said that he had been thinking and praying for Brett on his way home from work and that it struck him that Brett would be doing his Jump on Saturday and that if I just went out to the airfield on Saturday then I would be able to see him for a minute!! He gave me a good little lecture about how I shouldn't draw attention to Brett or really even call out his name ( you don't want to draw undo attention to oneself in Ranger School...) but that at least we might be able to wave at each other. So, Saturday morning Amy ( Amy was visiting me...and thus had the "privilege of sitting in the hot sun with me), Ransom and I packed up and sat in the sun for about an hour and half...watching feverishly as tiny dots being dropped from the sky turned into men in uniform...FINALLY one of those dots turned into Brett and we waved and smiled at each other...and then Brett came over to me!! I pleaded with him to not talk to me since I didnt want him to get in trouble, but he would have none of it! And so we talked for several minutes...and he got to look at Ransom and see how much he's grown! It was glorious!
Of course, all good things in Ranger School must come to an end...because he was then found out and yelled at. I, of course, felt sick to my stomach...if I had some how gotten Brett in trouble and therefore hurt his chances of passing then I would be physically ILL! But, after a phone call to our Ranger Instructor friend I found that the worse Brett would recieve was a slap on the wrist! WHEW!!! So back to being happy about getting to see him!!

September 06, 2010

Promise

I read this in my time with the Lord tonight, and I'm taking it as a promise for Brett this week...please continue to be praying! He's currently in the last week of the first phase and we'll be finding out soon enough if he passed this first phase! I'm nervous about it-but above all I know that the Lord WILL be glorified in this...

I know your works. Behold, I have set before you an open door, which no one is able to shut. I know that you have but little power, and yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name. Behold, I will make those of the synagogue of Satan bow down before your feet and they will learn that I have loved you. Because you have kept my word about patient endurance, I will keep you from the hour of trial that is coming on the whole world, to try those who dwell on the earth." Rev 3:8-10

September 02, 2010

Perspective

For a little perspective I'll start this post off with a picture of the past two days...



And now to more positive things...So around 11:30 I was pacing the living room with my screaming baby, crying myself. While I'd made it practically the whole previous day without crying-until the very end. I was not as "mentally sound" the second day of the screaming and so *I* started in on my crying at 11:30. But, before I could get well and truly beside myself.. my dear friend Marie stopped by to drop off milk ( seriously, such good friends), she took one look at me and took Ransom away to her house.

And so I took a shower and a nap...in silence. I then brought my little screaming baby home and my friend and neighbor Michelle dropped off more groceries and stayed to work her baby whisperer magic on Ransom for a while.

Thus I got through yet another screaming day. To be honest I do not know if I would be as grateful, as reflective as I am now about the wonderful help that God has blessed me with this week if Ransom hadn't decided to do his version of the exorcist...So, haha, I'd like to think I've learned my lesson and that I am properly thankful now so that we can STOP these awful crying spells...but just incase I hadn't gotten the full and complete message from God, I also received a package in the mail today from my dear friend Katie M.
And so I took my package into the bathroom and opened her letter while I was peeing...I tell you this because seriously that's the kind of multi-tasking I've been reduced to...I now open the mail on the toliet because I only have time for ONE activity between screaming fits...but I digress...
Katie's letter explained that she'd been inspired ( I think by the holy spirit) to make me a absolutely incredible encouragement pillow based off of a blog post that I wrote back in 2009 about a missionary couple, the Boardmans. Little did Katie know, but I actually have, more than once, gone back and read that blog post to remind myself of the Big Picture, for the Boardmans, while I only met them twice before they both passed away, have been some of the most lasting influential people in my spiritual life...and Katie had done for me what I couldn't do for myself ( in the post I actually said: "If there was ever anything worthy of being embroidered on a pillow, if I knew how, THAT would be something worth embroidering!" ) and put their life motto on a pillow for me!!



And so there I was crying in the bathroom...but this time because I was so grateful that the Lord has blessed me SO MUCH this week. Beyond what I could have imagined. He has showed me just how very MUCH in need of His grace I really am! And let me tell you. that can be awfully humbling! And so now I am renewed in my prayers for both myself and especially for Brett, that we would live out these next few months for His glory ( and its very clear that it'll only be through His grace that that will be possible!)

So THANK YOU Katie for the wonderful reminder that I can look at all the time!

September 01, 2010

Fairs fair

So, it seems only natural and right that after yesterdays upbeatness I would have a completely difficult day today...but really, to be fair it didn't get "difficult" until around 5pm. At five pm the fact that Ransom had literally cried every minute that he was not sleeping or eating all day had finally worn on my nerves to the point of fed-up-ness.
In the end my friend Marie came over and helped me rule out my milk supply being low as a source of Ransom's woes...but seriously...now we're back to square one, and I'm just going to pray that he was just "having a bad day" and that that bad day does not translate over into nights.

On the upside I have wonderful friends. One friend called to see if I needed anything from the store and then brought me batteries for my swing ( I take it back, Ransom was quiet for about 5 minutes in the swing...until the novelty wore off. haha) , another friend came over to my house to bake cupcakes for another friend of ours...she seriously took the time and trouble to bring over all the ingredients so that she could make them at my house instead of hers so that I'd get some adult company ( while my child screamed). Seriously sweet. And then, Marie also came to my aid this evening with help trying to figure out just WHAT is the matter with my crying child. All in all I know I am blessed.

Oh. And Brett had his first big patrol ( that's basically graded) today and I didn't really know about it until after the fact, then I felt guilty for not spending more of my day praying for him....

Ok. Its officially today needs to just be over.