August 31, 2010

cue the music

So, wanna here something cool?!?

Exactly one year before Ransom was born ( actually it was three hundred and sixty FOUR days before...but whatever. it was close!) I wrote this verse in my journal.

"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward." Ps 127:3

CRAZY! I never would have GUESSED that exactly a year later I'd be in labor with my own little "heritage" :-)

We saw the sun

So today Ransom and I were terribly productive. Although he did have a silly way of waking up and demanding to be fed every time I was on the phone with a person ( twice). But, despite that..We had a good day.

I did some storing up of milk so that one day in the future Brett and I can have a date *sigh*. And this may seem very incidental but when you're already feeding your kid and then you're ALSO storing up milk for later...you feel like you are a NON-stop milk cow in a production line or something. Its tiring! So I'm only going to do that once a day...

I wrote some long overdue thank you cards

We went for a WALK ( this was seriously the best part of my day! Honestly it was awesome just to be OUTSIDE. And currently we're having remarkably cool weather here in Georgia. And by cool I mean it was in the 80s.

We worked on Ransom going to sleep for his nap without being held. ( this worked remarkably well...although I confess I WAS putting him down already half asleep pretty much every time).

I took a SHOWER. And I SHAVED MY LEGS and WASHED MY HAIR.

I did some laundry because Ransom peed on his changing table...twice. ( I need more changing table covers! haha!)

And I ate THREE meals all of which were well balanced ( thanks to my wonderfully full fridge of leftovers from all the great meals friends have brought me!)

So yes, these are all basic things but I feel remarkably proud of each and every one of them...And, just think! Only two more days and I'll have another visitor! And actually, I have to say I so felt the Lord's help the last two days as well...in fact, without even planning I've had a friend come over both Sunday and Monday evening-which, looking back, I think evenings are always the most lonely times of the day-at least for me- and without even a thought the Lord provided help before I even asked for it!

August 29, 2010

One week down!

Woo HOO! We've survived one week without Daddy!! Didn't think it was possible, it was the longest week EVER ( probably not as long as this coming week will be, but we'll see!!) and we survived a whole night by ourselves last night and so I'm optimistic that we'll live through this week ahead ( although you'd never guess from my dramatic facebook status last night...one should not get to have internet access at all hours of the night, its probably not good for the censors.)

It was soooo great having my mom here! Not just all the helpfulness with Ransom...but I don't think the two of us have had that much together time in YEARS! So bonus!


Somebody doesn't like to get baths...but there's nothing like a few fingers to sooth you from the stress!



And his hair is SO CUTE after his bath! It makes me want to brave the screams ALL THE TIME.



Maybe I'm just missing Ransom's Daddy a lot but I think he looks more like him every day!



Today Ransom slept with his head hanging off my lap...you'd think this would be uncomfortable...

August 28, 2010

A preemptive reminder

Before I could even begin to feel sorry for myself or for Ransom that we're about to spend the week alone together...I was reminded in a huge big fat way today that we're not even remotely alone.

Enter Women's Breakfast.

This was our first women's breakfast here at Fort Benning ( at least since I've been living here...which has ALMOST BEEN A YEAR! Where did the time go?! Has it seriously been that long?!?) and it was a smashing success! There were quite a few new faces that I had never met before plus I got to see a lot of ladies that I hadn't seen since I had a baby ( which was THREE WEEKS AGO! REALLY?! TIME! ITS OUT OF HAND!) and that's what reminded me that I have SO many lovely ladies who are just itching ( or so they say) to come over and hang out with me next week! Plus, my lovely neighbor Michelle actually offered to come hang out with Ransom so I could take a nap-which, lets be honest, is an EVEN BETTER offer at this point ;-) hehe!

And that's not even counting all the lovely people out there praying for our little family while we go through this separation! We are truly truly blessed. So even though I was TERRIBLY SAD to see my Mom go for so many reasons...I know that we'll be ok.

Oh, and that reminds me...One of my lady friends from the breakfast today was able to pass a message on to me from Brett!! Her husband works out at the Ranger Battalion and he was able to see Brett for a few minutes! I cannot tell you how much this means to me...almost more than the "I love you" message, just the fact that Brett got to talk to a friendly face for a few minutes...thats a blessing.

By day the Lord commands his steadfast love, and at night his song is with me. Ps 42:8

I'm really digging the verses about night these days...I see so much of it!

August 25, 2010

Space time continuum

I think we're in some sort of time/space anomaly. Days seem to be flying by and yet theweek that seems to be going extra slowly! Brett hasn't even been gone four days yet! Unbelievable! Time has really gotta start speeding up!

And speaking of Brett, he has the 15 mile ruck march out to Camp Darby tomorrow, so if you'd like to be praying for something you can be praying for that....lots of blisters and sore backs ( they have to carry all their gear, and let me tell you...there is a LOT of it!) coming up!

Also, if you'd like to write Brett a letter while he's in Ranger School you can do that too! Here's the address you'll need for the first phase ( it'll change in about three weeks so I'll keep you updated).

Captain Brett Wilson, 324
4th Ranger Training Battalion
ATTN: Class,10-10 Company C
10850 Schneider Road
Fort Benning, GA 31905

And here's an interesting factoid about Brett and Abigail:
Our relationships basically began through letters to Ranger School! As I've mentioned before this is not Brett's first go around with Ranger School and the first time ( which was almost five years ago! CRAZY!), he and I were still just friends. We had tentatively started talking a lot more and I definitely had a HUGE OL' crush on him and so when I found out that he was going off to some "school" for months on end where his only communication was going to be letters by mail, I was pretty disappointed. I didn't want to write him unless he specifically asked me to-since I didn't want to appear desperate ( ha!) and as the days leading up to his departure slipped away and he had made no such request I figured any ideas of a Brett and Abigail union where, just that, ideas....but then! On the DAY that he left he sent me an email asking if I'd write him! I was SO HAPPY!
I even remember that the first letter I wrote him was me rambling on about Oceans12-which I think was the movie I was watching at the time....ahhh...how far we've come since then! I feel like in some ways our Ranger School/Relationship has come full circle since now my letters are not about silly movies but about our son and what God's been saying to me during my quiet times!

August 24, 2010

you got it!

So, I don't know who was praying, but AWESOME! Because, last night Ransom was an ANGEL! He hardly made a peep...just some little noises to wake me up to eat! Of course, just now he woke out of a dead sleep to scream for two minutes only to fall back into a deep sleep...so yeah, every moment is different! ( I would say every day is different, but that doesn't seem to cover it.) But, I will delight in all the good moments as much as I can...like these, for instance:




August 23, 2010

One Down

Today Brett had his physical training test for Ranger School. This test is used to weed out about 150 guys so the standards are pretty crazy. Brett was not feeling super confident going into the test since, unlike the last time he did Ranger School, he'd been doing a lot less running this past year and felt like his run time for the 5 miler was really close to the cut off...
But today came and I got a text from our friend Charlie ( who has inside information) that both Brett and Jaymon passed the test!
I obviously don't know any other details but one thing I did think was pretty cool was that this morning on our way to Ransom's two week doctors appt, I noticed that it was only 75 degrees! At 9:30!! It's usually already in the upper 80s by then!! This means that Brett got to do his test in much cooler weather than normal! How good is God to take care of even these little details?!
I thank you all for your continued prayers... I know the Lord is answering them!
As for Ransom and I... The child has developed some serious colic and spent the better part of last night and today screaming. Hopefully some Mylicon drops will begin to help the situation because I cried a good bit of last night with him... Praying tonight will be better.

Sent from my iPhone

August 22, 2010

Never changes

Its awful when Brett leaves. I hate it. And in has never gotten easier. In fact, this evening I went and read my blog posts on the days that Brett left for Afghanistan. Both times were awful. How could I forget?!

And this is no better.

In fact, its been kind of harder considering I've got Ransom here and I feel like my normal coping mechanisms are being cramped by this new little person who needs to eat all the time.

And right now, right now he's crying. Ransom has been crying for ten minutes. I want to cry too.

August 20, 2010

One More Day

Brett leaves for Ranger School on Sunday. In good Pollyanna style: I've been spending the last few days thinking of all the things I am thankful for...there is a lot.

And I'm going to mention one really important thing right now and then I probably won't mention it again and that is that I am very grateful that Brett is just going to Ranger School. He is not DEPLOYING on Sunday. As hard and as awful as it is to say goodbye to him and to imagine the next few months of Ransom's life without his Daddy around-I am terribly grateful that they will ( Lord willing!!) only BE a few months long-not a year.
AND on top of that, Brett will not be in quite as much life threatening danger as he would be deployed ( though they did make sure is life insurance was in order which was not at all comforting)....and so I am thankful. I am thankful that Brett was here for these first two weeks of Ransom's life-that we got to experience the excitement and mind-boggling life changing experience of having a baby together. I am so grateful...

And we get one more day together. Tomorrow.

And then the praying goes into EXTREME mode. So get ready! :-)

August 17, 2010

Ransom Part 4: The Medical Drama

*Warning* This post may have some graphic medical stuff that might turn the stomach of the faint at heart-be wary!

So, like I mentioned in my last installment of Ransom's birth-the midwife said I had a lot of bleeding after the birth, but that she'd be back in a few hours to check on things- so after several hours, in which we got to introduce Ransom to my family and Brett got to change his first poopy diaper, the midwife returned with the Obstetrician who was on call to check on my stitches and see how my bleeding was doing. It didn't take the doctor long before she realized that the extensive bleeding was not coming from my stitches but that a piece of placenta was still inside me ( apparently I had an extra lobe of placenta so that when the original placenta was removed it didn't seem as though it wasn't completely intact and so the midwife had no idea there was any left inside me) ....

And so without further ado she starts pulling things out of me ( I'm not sure what, I wasn't looking...) and then things got intense. It seems that once she got the rogue piece of placenta out, my uterus started to freak out and the bleeding intensified and my uterus was not contracting. I was literally crying in pain and blacked out for a few seconds because of the lack of blood-but there were seriously two doctors, a midwife and about five nurses all running around the room, sticking me with needles, putting in an extra IV line and putting all sorts of drugs into my body-all while this doctor was going hardcore messaging of my uterus from the inside and out trying to get it to contract. They even started preparing the OR just incase things didn't go well-and it was then I realized that I might loose my uterus.

And that's also when I realized I didn't want Ransom to be an only child.


I looked over at Brett who was sitting in the corner holding Ransom, as the room filled up with people all working on me. Poor guy. That must have been overwhelming. And I know he and I were both praying pretty hard at this point- But it all happened so very fast, and it was-luckily-over relatively quickly.
Thankfully the doctor was able to finally get my uterus to corporate and the blood loss was slowed.

I ended up having to get a blood transfusion the next day, because I lost about triple the normal amount of blood for a birth-and let me tell you, that extra blood made ALL the difference in my recovery!!

All in all, I am able to say how GRATEFUL I am that we had the birth experience that we did-a combo of both a wonderful team of midwives who were with us every single step of the way, as well as medical doctors and nurses who also stepped in when they were really needed. God was very good to us, and I am happy to say that Ransom and I are both on the road to being normal human beings ;-)

August 16, 2010

Little things

I'm taking a tiny break from "Ransom Part _" posts for a moment because as of today I've been a mom for a whole week! We lived through it! Ransom lived through it! YAY!

When people ask how we're doing I say we're doing great, because-well, I feel like we are. I mean sure I'm sleep deprived and you never REALLY know what the next feeding time will bring, and I'm pretty sure the ONLY thing I got accomplished outside of feeding Ransom/starring at Ransom last week was the following:

I wrote four thank you cards.
I made one power point slide for the Army Leadership Team.
I wrote some blog posts.

That's it.

That's all I did. All week.

But, that's cool! And I am SO GRATEFUL that I have such a life, such friends and such a husband who have made that level of "relaxation" possible!!

The other sweet thing that last week brought was all sorts of lovely surprises in the mail...I got cupcakes delivered from Brett's old boss and his wife ( seriously, awesome. ) and I got the cutest box from my darling friend Kristy that included two of her wonderful greeting cards. I am so blessed to have such a talented friend who makes me smile with her creations. I've been looking at these cards all week...do you notice the little initials in the corner for the pram?! Perfect!




You can check out Kristy's wonderful creations at Mulberrymoment.com

We have also been receiving yummy homecooked meals every few days that are insuring that I will not be loosing too much "baby fat" any time soon-but, hey, we're well fed! And I am SO grateful that I don't have to think about food at all! Huge relief.


So, yes, week one is down. I think Ransom might be just as happy as I am that we've made it through....

August 15, 2010

Ransom Part 3: The grand entrance

So, just to sum up the last post: Epidurals..they are wonderful.

And finally after 36 hours we were ready to push that baby out! I remember looking at Brett and thinking, "Wow. We're going to have a baby!"

As though that were brand new information.

But, anyway, luckily it didn't take too long to bring Ransom into the world ( haha! At least from THIS POINT), which was a blessing since it became apparent pretty quickly that things weren't going super well with Ransom once I started pushing. The midwife and nurse were super calm about it, but nothing could cover up the truth of the heart monitor- Ransom's heart rate had gone waaay down and became very sporadic and so between contractions I started praying pretty hard that God would help me to push him out quickly.

Not to be too graphic, but first came the top of Ransom's head and Brett told me later he was afraid I was going to have a baby Klingon ( too much startrek for him!) but one that was definitely true: We were going to have a hairy baby! This I was not surprised about, I have been looking forward to having a baby with a full head of hair from the beginning of my pregnancy. It was pretty much the one thing I felt like I could know for sure about a kid that was a combo of Brett and I...we have a LOT of hair. Surely we'd pass that on.

And pass it on we did.

Anyway, 20 minutes after beginning to push, Ransom entered the world. The culprit of his distress was clear, the umbilical cord had been wrapped around his neck! But, God had answered my prayers, and we got him out quickly! The nurse announced the time: "14:21"

And Brett and I both looked at each other both immediately knowing what the other was thinking...one of the verses that we have memorized and love is John 14:21. And right then I knew that this was yet another promise on Ransom's life. I will most definitely be telling him that his "Life verse" is:

He who has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me. And he who loves me is loved by the Father and I too will love him and show myself to him."


And I pray that this will be true of Ransom's life.


So, there he was-our little baby boy. The nurse and midwife started placing wagers on how much he was going to weigh, but none of them got close! He was much bigger than they thought! ( And I must admit I was pretty well satisfied since I'd been dealing with all those people telling me he was going to be "tiny") Coming in at a nice 8 lbs, 1 oz and 20 inches long-he was perfectly adorable. I spent the next however long staring at Ransom trying to take him in while the midwife "finished me up."

Once again I'll spare you the details, but it should be noted that I was apparently bleeding a lot and the midwife told me she would be bringing in an obstetrician to check my stitches and my bleeding a little later on. I didn't think anything of this...

And so Ransom was introduced to my parents and my sister who had gotten on a flight to Georgia the night before and had been waiting patiently all day for his arrival ( they hadn't eaten ANYTHING for most of the day just in case they missed anything....Ransom should know he's loved. hehe!)

Stay tuned for the last installment of Ransom's Birth...the Medical Emergency Drama Segment.



August 13, 2010

Ransom Part 2: Labor is an understatement

So, before I get started Brett wants me to tell you that I was not 2cm dilated the first time I went to the hospital...I was a three. But I MIGHT HAVE WELL HAVE BEEN A TWO.

Because back home we went where I dealt with closer and closer together contractions-but this time from the "comfort" of my bathtub. Someone once told me that laboring in water was like "hardly laboring at all"...and honestly, I don't know what they're talking about. I mean, maybe it was TINY bit better in the water...but saying that it was a relaxing bath would be leading all my dear readers astray.

At around 3am I was pretty well discouraged again. Because if you're keep track ( WHICH I SURE WAS), I had now been in labor for twenty four hours. TWENTY FOUR HOURS OF NO SLEEPING FOR ABIGAIL.

I told Brett I wanted an Epidural. And I wanted it now.

Brett being the calm and loving husband that he was, took me back to the hospital so that I could at least be admitted.

And that's when the wonderful midwives entered the picture. They were so calm, they were so supportive and they seriously were a godsend to Brett and I both over the next 12 hours. We started off with Colonel Franklin who Brett said had a calming affect almost immediately. She was with us until the morning shift started, when Captain Nuter took over. ( incidentally Captin Nuter also delivered the babies of my three other friends who've had babies in the past 4 months. She has literally been the Navigator Baby Midwife extreme! haha!!)- Anyway, at around 7am Colonel Franklin suggested that I try some narcotics to help me relax and hopefully get some sleep ( I ended up getting about an hour of sleep) This I was all for, however, it is the decision that I made that I am least happy with now. While it did keep me from getting an epidural at least for a while, the drugs made me drowsy and out of it, and also slowed down my contractions so much that I then had to be put on pitocin. Basically my labor went from being natural to being drug driven.
But, anyway, that's where we were when the morning shift took over and Captin Nuter entered the scene. Colonel Franklin had also taken care of Brett, allowing him to get about an hour of sleep and a break to go grab some breakfast. And so we started the morning still laboring on...
At 10:30 the midwife broke my water and BOY HOWDY things got more intense. I spent the next hour and a half in the shower and on the birth ball. I was at 8 cm when I started and the HOPE was that by the end of it I would be ready to push.

And so, at noon she checked me again to see how I'd progressed and the answer was: none.

I was still at an 8.

And so that's when I got the epidural.

Now, on my last post Amy insinuated that I was a weeny for getting an epidural. And I'm sorry, I've got to disagree. I mean, sure, easy for me to say...but I'd gone for a Really REALLY long time without the drugs and I think, in a lot of ways, that epidural helped my body relax enough to go the rest of the way. Anyway, weeny or not...I finally got about two hours of sleep and then woke up around 2pm, fully dialated and ready to push!

YAY!

I was so SO happy that we'd finally reached this point. And was way excited to meet Ransom....

Stay tuned for the continued story of Ransom

August 12, 2010

Ransom, Part 1: The beginnings

So, lets start with how much I love sleep and how much I secretly asked God that I would not be in labor during the night...and how God did not deem that a necessary prayer to answer...and so it was that I started having contractions around 3am on Sunday morning.

Luckily the contractions were not terrible, just not particularly conducive to sleep either and so I entertained myself by listening to several "What You Missed in History Class" podcasts and tried hard to rest. And so that's how we spent Sunday...me having contractions about every 8 to 10 minutes and spending the rest of the time reading ( Brett read Harry Potter: Book 4 out loud to me) and basically trying to stay comfortable. I wouldn't say the contractions were terrible but they were definitely the kind you had to stop whatever you were doing to get through and so I figured we couldn't be too far away from things progressing..however, by Sunday evening I had given up hope of having a baby that day..it just didn't seem possible since my contractions were just NOT getting closer together.

By Sunday evening I was super de duper cranky and I finally just had a really good cry were I told Brett and God that I didn't want to do this anymore. I mean, it was like having a giant screw in my stomach that got turned every few minutes but never actually GOT ANYWHERE. And then my contractions bumped up to every 5 minutes. WOO HOO! That's what when they told me I could go to the hospital! Surely they would tell me that I was SUPER CLOSE to having this baby!! After all...I'd been doing this whole "contraction business" for 17 hours or so that should be worth something!
And so Brett made himself a cup of coffee and I timed my contractions and got really annoyed that he was taking so long.

Of course, now I know that Brett could have made lattes for half of Fort Benning and we would STILL have had plenty of time to get to the hospital.

But, side note...you know what is NOT FUN!?! Having contractions in the car. Yeah. Sitting or lying was pretty much the LAST position I wanted to be in.

So Hospital arrival number one: The bad sign was probably the fact that I was able to smile and be civil with the doctor who checked me out. Yeah...now I know that when you're really in labor there is no time for civil.

We were sent home only 2 cm dilated and super deflated spirits. Here it was 11pm and I was having contractions every three minutes and it looked like I had another sleepless night ahead....

Stay tuned for more...Part 2: The Second Night

August 11, 2010

Bonus Baby Post

So, Brett and I were very blessed to have my parents and sister jump on a plane and come for Ransom's birth. They arrived in plenty of time ( since he was so polite and waited for everyone to get nice and comfortable in georgia before being born) and were incredibly helpful to Brett and I during those first 48 hours...plus it was just fun getting to share in the joy of Ransom's birth.

And this has to be one of my favorite moments...Brett and Papa changing Ransom's first really intense diaper....I cannot BELIEVE I caught this picture but it is CLASSIC.

Introductions:

Well, here he is, Ransom Nathaniel Wilson in all his glory... he finally arrived on Monday, August 9th 2010 ( 8, 9, 10...awesome date!) and when I say finally I'm talking 36 hours of hard laboring. WHEW! Did I earn that epideral! But, I'm getting ahead of myself! I'll tell you the full labor/delivery story shortly but for now, here's a picture of Mr. Ransom in his 8 lbs 1 oz, 20 inches long glory...

August 06, 2010

Meditating...

So in honor of my "due date"...( what a joke that is!!) here is what I've meditated on this morning...you know, just in case it helps move things along ;-)


Is 35: 9 No lion will be there,
       nor will any ferocious beast get up on it;
       they will not be found there.
       But only the redeemed will walk there,

 10 and the RANSOMED of the Lord will return.
       They will enter Zion with singing;
       everlasting joy will crown their heads.
       Gladness and joy will overtake them,
       and sorrow and sighing will flee away.


Jer. 31:  11 For the Lord will RANSOM Jacob
       and redeem them from the hand of those stronger than they.

Hosea 13:14 "I will RANSOM them from the power of the grave ;
       I will redeem them from death.
       Where, O death, are your plagues?
       Where, O grave, is your destruction?
      

August 05, 2010

It must be a pillow

So, I am currently torn between two conflicting emotions-one is that I am annoyed/afraid by all the comments from everyone that my stomach is looking so small ( he measures pretty small too..but this COULD be because he's moved down so low into my pelvis..) and it makes me feel somehow guilty or bad that he isn't bigger, like maybe I didn't eat enough carrots ( gross!) or something during my pregnancy. And I can't STOP myself from comparing my stomach size to other women and it DOES seem like I look smaller than most women who's due date is TOMORROW.

The other part of me is really really tired of being giant. And that's right. I feel giant and I look giant. How can I say this while I just said I looked smaller than other women...eh. I blame hormones. But, believe me...ITS POSSIBLE TO BE BOTH.

I'm also really starting to pray hard that Ransom will come on his own. I so do not want to be induced!!! And yet, I'm already feeling discouraged that he'll never EVER come out if left to his own devices! He just seems to DARN HAPPY to continue kicking my ribs and causing heartburn forever and ever.

August 03, 2010

August...the scary month

So here we are! Its August!!! (!!!)

I'm using extra exclamation marks because seriously that's how it has been written in my mind for months and months. August is the month of Baby and the month of Ranger School.

The two scariest things in Brett and Abigail's lives.

Now, just to be clear, one of them is a good kinda scary the kind of scary that you're like, "Hey, it would be super duper awesome if this scary-awesome thing would just go ahead and COME ALREADY." ( And that would be Baby Ransom).

But the other scary thing, Ranger School...well, I suppose it some ways even though its not a good kind of scary, I think we're pretty ready for it to come too.

You see, Ranger School , has been a part of Brett and my life together from the beginning. In fact, in some ways it PUNCTUATED the beginning. Brett went to Ranger School when he was a 2nd Lieutenant and he and I had just renewed a friendship. Before he left for this super scary ( yet I really had NO IDEA what it was) school he asked me if I'd write him letters while he was there...and so I did...and thus began our Romance of Sorts.

However, Brett did not make it through in one go ( if go to the link that I left you above, you'll find out that Ranger School is divided into sections and you can be recycled at any of those section) in fact, he did not make it through in TWO goes...and while he, in the end, he passed each section-there was a caveat that said if you had more "no goes" ( which is what they say when you get recycled) than "goes"-than you get kicked out.

And so there Brett was...he'd put in many grueling months of basic torture ( and that's NOT an exaggeration) only to be told he'd failed.

Now, I'm starting to get into Brett's story here...which is not fair, since this blog is called "Abigail's Day" not "Brett's Day"...but I'm just telling you this little bit of information so that you'll understand that Ranger School has hung over the heads of Brett and Abigail our whole marriage. Its the thing that didn't get completed, its the thing that defines so many Infantry officers and yet, here we were...lacking.

Or so we thought. I think God has done a lot of work in both our lives in the last few years and neither of us is the same person we were when Brett first went through Ranger School. And yet there is always a little part of you that fears that you HAVEN'T changed that much and that it WILL be just as awful this time around...WORSE even!! (!!)

There are parts of me that wonder just HOW we will go on if Brett doesn't make it through again, or what I'll say as encouragement when things get rough ( which I'm sure they will), or just how I'm going to cope with a brand new baby while my husband is off facing this "mountain". But those are all fears too. And so that's what I've been doing lately. Trying to identify fear.

Fear is a nasty little sucker who likes to lie and cheat you out of life ( or at least the living of it in true abundant form) and often times fear is what absolutely keeps us from the Joy that we have in Christ.

My dear blogger friends I'm going ahead and airing my fears to you today so that you'll know...so that you'll be praying for myself and for Brett as we face August ( and several months after...) that we'll be able to face our fears with not our own strength but with the Grace and Faith that comes from above.

And hopefully at the end of it all, we'll be able to rejoice together when these fears are officially conquered...

But, for now, we wait...we wait on a baby who's still happily chillin in my tummy...and for August 22nd which is when Brett reports to Ranger School...