February 28, 2007

"Play it again..."

I know I've already quoted this song today...but I was serious when I said its been on repeat. And on my way home from church tonight, the last verse practically yelled at me-cementing the prayers I had prayed during the prayer meeting...

Every fear and accusation under my feet
when time and space are through
I'll be found in you...

I have realized, that somewhere along the way I have let my own insecurities and slight worries about aspects of my job ( specifically this matter of going out and asking for sponsorships) turn into something much much bigger than it is. It is now Bigger. It is a spiritual matter.
Because honestly, as a follower of the Lord, I should not be held captive to a fear like this...I should not be frozen in my steps, I should not be hindered in whatever has been set before me.

I have listened to Lies. I have believed them.

But, no more.

I choose to live in Hope, to live in Love, to live in Faith.

as good as gold

I got a grand total of four hours of sleep last night...and those four where not really the best. Curses to the Coke that I had at 4:30pm!

You could say I've been struggling to have a good day. By lunch time I had a plan. I sat in my car and listened to this song about five times...( I was only able to find the music video...watch it, this song is fabulous.) Honestly, how great are these lyrics?!

When the world has fallen out from under me, I'll be found in You, still standing...

Anywho, the other little glimmer of good was while I was listening to this song, I stuck my hand into this little cubby in my car, looking for a pen, and instead I pulled out....a Whittaker's Peanut Slab that Kristy had generously given me ( she and I both know just how MUCH these little bricks of chocolate are worth outside of NZ) when she visited...and I had consequently 'saved it for later'.

Today, it was as if God had re-gifted that little slab of chocolate...and it was perfect. We're never ever alone. Even in our car.Even on a very grey day.

February 27, 2007

Why this is perfect summer weather.

I totally believe that Texas is absolutely PERFECT on a few special days at the end of February and in the middle of March. I believe that perfect weather requires a light sweater, open windows, sun and no shoes. ever.

The irony is that I do loveshoes...I just dont like to wear them constantly that's all.

So I made it, my board meeting is over and done with for the second month of the year, and I am happy to announce that my job is still very securely mine.

I got in my car and praised God, because honestly, He is so faithful....I know I don't deserve this kinda support and down right ignoring of my various shortcomings.

Funny event of the day: I was "cordially invited" to join the Rotary Club. Let us all pause and think how in the world this 23 year-old girl would fit in with all the 50/60something year old Suits who gather to eat really dreadful food every Tuesday....

Although, the thought of being the YOUNGEST Rotarian ever does have its draws....

I just watched the movie A Good Year...it made me so very very much wish that I was in Europe sitting at a cafe with a lovely bottle of wine and an entire afternoon to waste. *sigh*

Back to my reading....( I will give you a review of my latest book find once I'm through...)

February 26, 2007

its that time again...

I am going to be fired.

ok, SUUUUURE last month I didnt get fired, even though I was sure I would be...but this month, THIS month I'm pretty positive they've got good reason.

I only have a SMALL PORTION of the money needed to reach last years fundraising efforts on the Scholarship Golf Tournament, which is in a month... ( itsallforthechildren..)

I know, I know...working for a nonprofit organization how do I think we get money? Did I really think I'd be able to get away with not having to come right out an ASK ( in person, because I do it in written form pretty much constantly..I like the written word so much better)?!

So, yes, I'm waiting to be burated at my boardmeeting tomorrow. Tears from Heaven. I deserve it.

(if you havent already noticed the pattern of me worrying about getting fired at the end of every month just in time for my board meeting...well, get with it, the pattern is obvious.)

And on the same note of this week not being the tiniest bit cool- you know that guy, Brett, the one that I gush about all the time? Well, he's taking some LAME-O ( not really) scuba diving certification class...which is totally manopolizing my talking on the phone time. I hate scuba diving, and I hate this whole "bettering ones self" thing. Don't worry, I've already decided to be a supportive girlfriend-but that doesnt mean that can't do it whilest whining, right? Right? ;-)

February 23, 2007

rules to live by.

I have these three inch heels that for some reason I keep insisting on wearing to work. Every time I wear them I resolve that they are NOT WORTH IT and that I will throw them away as soon as I get home ( they are waaay uncomfortable)...and then, without fail, some girlie-girl will walk past me in the store, or in the hall, or when I'm waiting for my coffee and they'll say, "awww...cute shoes!"

So, I always keep them. But, let me just tell you-if I EVER wear these shoes and go the WHOLE DAY without getting a single compliment I am THROWING THESE THINGS AWAY.

That's a warning to the shoes. ;-)

Wow. How vain am I?!

-It has come to my attention that I work much, much better in the afternoon. I end up wasting my whole morning and then having to stay late. But, to be honest, I'd rather have it this way...but, once again, I am NOT a morning person.

February 22, 2007

Season Three: The Life and Times

So, I'm feeling slightly nostalgic . Mostly because I realized that the very last of my close friends were graduating from university. We're talking the friends I made in my LAST year of college...so, yes, there is basically no one left to connect me with the cool kids of college....or wait...lets make that the cool cids of college. Yes, much better, who needs correct spelling when there is alliteration to be had?
Annnyway, add that to hearing a song that I hadnt heard since The Year of The Valley ( cerca 2005) that nearly sent me to crying yesterday...and you've got yourself some good old fashion "I'm sooo glad its 2007" action.

To be honest the future scares me like there's no tomorrow ( ironic word choice there, Abigail)...and yet, I can look back to a time when the future was equally scary ( as in: TOTALLY UNKNOWN) and think, yes, the Lord was very faithful. I'm totally doing an Ebenezer action on today ( check out the reference here)...because, I'm currently praying for a lot of overwhelmed people at the moment. I dont know how I get a prayer list of "common problems"...but I am encouraged to know that so many of us struggle with this overwhelmed with life feeling...I also do not think it is by sheer coincidence that I would hear of so many who need prayers in this department.
I really look forward to telling the stories of February 2007 as an example of how the Lord provided..the Lord helped...the Lord blessed...the Lord gave abundantly...

Your stories my dearest friends inspire me, your very lives bless me for He is mirrored in your very days.

February 20, 2007


First of all, I recommend that you go and rent the movie Mozart and the Whale whenever you get the chance. What a lovely breath of fresh air in the midst of a whole bunch of bad movies! :-)

Secondly, I just had to share Streams in the Desert with you tonight, it encouraged me...may it encourage you.

It is possible for believers who are completely willing to trust the power of the Lord for their safekeeing and victory to lead a life of readily taking HIs promises exactly as they are and finding them to be true.

It is possible to daily "cast all your anxiety on him" ( I Peter 5:7) and experience deep peace in the process.
It is possible to have our thoughts and desires of our hearts purified in the deepest sense of the word.
It is possible to see God's will in every circumstance and to accept it with singing instead of complaining.
It is possible to become strong through and through by completely taking refuge in the power of God and by realizing our greatest weakness and the things that upset our determination to be patient, pure, or humble provide an opportunity to make sin powerless over us. This opportunity comes from Him who loves us and who works to bring us into agreement with His will and theereby supplies a blessed sense of His presence and His power.

Oh that this might be true in my life. For it is possible!


So, I hardly ever speak of current events on this blog unless, of course, they pertain to me. hehehe But, I was reading about this article on Britney Spears latest antics and I just felt so incredibly sorry for her. Perfect example that this World in which we live, no matter how much money or fame you might have, it does not offer Happiness.

So sad.

February 19, 2007

A life's Calling

So, I living a small town. A small town where my father writes for the newspaper. A small town where my father also talks to every garden club or any other club for that matter that is in existence... a small town where everybody knows everybody. A small town where my parents "accidently" didnt put their number into the phonebook ( that's right, the excuse about "it being taken out while they lived in the hotel" doesnt stick anymore...because that was WELL over a year ago...and a new phonebook JUST came out and GUESS who was the ONLY "Abt" in the book?!).

Because of these and many more facts I get messages on my answering machine. I get phone calls at 7 in the morning. I get phone calls at 5 in the evening. To be honest I get more phonecalls for my father than I do for myself.

And it's annoying.

But, tonight I had to step back and be thankful for the things that my father does a splendid job of preserving in this town. There is something about stopping and listening to someone's stories ( which is what I get to do at my job), or sharing in the beauty of nature ( which is what Papa speaks about continually) that is truly a blessing. And tonight when that little old lady called to "speak to Jeff Abt" because she had a "whole field of flowers back behind her house that she thought he might like to see" and then she went on to quote a Wordsworth poem to me that the flowers had inspired her to remember....to be honest, when this conversation happened I was annoyed. I had had to stop what I was doing and RUN to catch the phone and then it was about some ladies FLOWERS...and she took for AGES quoting poetry to me! GEEEZ.

However, just now I was reading some of my book on 17th century poets...and I was thinking....to be a part of that little old ladies day, to share in her inspiration on beauty and what beauty had meant to her. That is far more important. In a world of cell phones and emails and reality tv...and new episodes of Lost...and Fox news....and all the other things that are, well, let's face it "unbeautiful"...I am grateful for a generation that is fast departing from this world...a generation that still quotes Wordsworth and Coleridge...a generation who tells rambly stories to me on the phone about "when they were in high school"....a generation that wore hats to church ( and gloves)...who faught for this country and freedom-in a much "simpler" time.

So, I am glad for the phonecalls, I am glad for the interruptions at work...because I think it makes my life a little bit more meaningful. I just hope I can hold on to it all....because I think everyone's life deserves to be remembered and cherished in some way.

Just not at 7am when I'm trying to hold onto sleep. No. That's a bad time for LIfe to call...

if only...

I could write for a living...the ONE THING about my current job that I am ABSOLUTELY confident about, is the article that I write for the local newspaper each week...every week I talk about nothing in an entertainming way that is, in turn, a thinly veiled way of reminding people of the Alumni Association and the work that we do...and each week I try to entertain the masses ( which I think I do) and each week I think to myself how I WISH someone would offer me a writing job....or a book deal. Or SOMETHING...that would be great. thanks.

Reality 101

So, Kristy's flight should be taking off shortly. meh. It makes me sad that she had to leave so quickly. However, I KNOW she's going to have a wonderful time in NYC.
One things for certain, I have truly been blessed with the most wonderful friends. I know that I say it all the time, but it bares repeating...I am continually blessed by each individual one and how they TRULY make my life better. And Kristy has once again brightened my life with her positive attitude and playful nature and more importantly her desire to Seek God in her life-its convicting and encouraging and inspiring ALL at the same time!. It was wonderful to hear all about her friends in Hong Kong and about the missions trip that she's leading in the coming months. It was fabulous to drink coffee with a fellow coffee-snob....it was fun to go shopping at random antique stores with her, to experience "grass" at the park ( apparently HK isnt big on grass. hehe)-even if it WAS windy like nobodies business...it was a delight to sit next to her in church again, and afterwards to hear her thoughts on my "home church" -which reminded me yet again of how absolutely rockin Heaven is going to be! ( think of all the people we're going to get to meet! And the infinite ways that we can worship God!!! )...and then we headed to Houston with Anna and did some power shopping. (side note: I bought a cocktail dress that is just TO DIE FOR...and honestly, WHERE am I going to wear this dress?! But whenever you feel THAT happy in a dress...the rule is, you MUST buy it. So, in conclusion, if you know of a cocktail party, then invite me. I've already got the dress ready to go!). We finished up our shopping with a really amazing dinner at this really amazing place ( you know, the kind of place that has about five waiters per table...yeah, it was lovely)....
But, ultimately, I miss Kristy already. She is such a dear friend. Definitely one that I can immediately pick right up where we left off....

But, now, now I'm back at work. Back to the worry of reality. And yet, I some how feel more optimistic about it...surely a Lord that is faithful to give-without deserving-such wonderful wonderful friends...will some how help me to do this job well...

February 17, 2007

tired. but happy.

I had a delightfully full day today-full of great friends...old and older ( and I'm NOT talking about age here. hehehehe geeez you people are sensitive.)

And I'm too tired to write more, but read this to know one of the reasons I can't stop smiling.

February 16, 2007

through the window...

Its totally gorgeous outside, which is really an answer to prayer since I like to give visitors good weather when they come to see me. ;-)

So, maybe its the sun. Or maybe its the really encouraging blogs I just read. ( It helps to see your friends fighting the Battle hard, and winning.). Maybe its the coffee. But, I'm really a lot more optimistic about life than I was yesterday. This can only be discribed as an answer to prayer. The Lord is ever faithful my dear friends.

Have a wonderful wonderful weekend. I know I will :-)


I got a $290 speeding ticket....but other than that we're home safe and sound. And....KRISTY'S HERE!!!!! :-)

February 15, 2007

pooooor meeeeee

A smallish complaint:

So, Poor Kristy's flight has been delayed until 11pm ( at least) because of the dreadful weather in NYC. Which means the earliest I'm getting to bed tonight is 2. And that's a POSITIVE outlook. meeeeh. Pray I can stay awake, wont you?

And to be honest, I'm really stressed about work at the moment. I feel very very much over my head with this fundraiser golf tournament. I do NOT like asking for money ( for sponsorships) . But, yeah, I have to. And I havent YET. And it's hanging over my head like a really really nasty something or another. :-( Sometimes working for a nonprofit orginization isnt cool.

But, you know what is good? The cake that I got from Brett for valentine's day...ohmygoodness....we all know how much I love cake....but I'm thinking even someone who DOESNT love cake would dig this one. We're talking chocolate goodness beyond belief.
Yup, I have the bestest boyfriend ever.

I think I'm going to splurge and go to the video store and rent a movie....I mean, I might as well...I've got hours and hours before I have to leave for houston. Poor Kristy. Stuck in the airport.

I think we could both use some prayer tonight.

February 14, 2007

All in the name of looooove...

Man, you should SEE the kids here at the high school today. Talk about overthetop... no wonder I hated Valentine's Day back in the day ( it got a lot more bareable once I left school)....I have been tempted more than once to stop one of these kiddos and ask them just HOW MUCH they spent on giant-impractical-stuffed-bears. Ahhh well, it has actually brought back many a good memory of my friends and I having giant chocolate/java jack-fests to cover up the fact that we didnt follow your social norms and have silly high school BFs...I know I've got pictures from my senior year in highschool somewhere...that was really the best one, if I remember correctly Katie actually ditched her boyfriend to come hang out with us girls instead! hahaha.


Yesterday I got a fabulous book of 17th Century poetry in the mail...its out of print, but I'd tracked down the last published edition ( cerca 1952, yeah baby! It even had teeny tiny hand printed notes in the margins! OH! I love old books!!) ...and so I spent a good portion of last night, blissfully researching the life of John Donne...and I have to confess that I had secret satisfaction that I could still quote a good portion of this** poem from when I studied it in college/Uni! Yesssss...some of that education really did stick!

It could be argued that I do not actually USE the English part of my major-but I beg to differ. Life is not worth living if you can't appreciate the Beauty of art every so often....And HONESTLY, isnt this beautiful?!

**SWEETEST love, I do not go,
For weariness of thee,
Nor in hope the world can show
A fitter love for me ;
But since that I
At the last must part, 'tis best,
Thus to use myself in jest
By feigned deaths to die.

Yesternight the sun went hence,
And yet is here to-day ;
He hath no desire nor sense,
Nor half so short a way ;
Then fear not me,
But believe that I shall make
Speedier journeys, since I take
More wings and spurs than he.

O how feeble is man's power,
That if good fortune fall,
Cannot add another hour,
Nor a lost hour recall ;
But come bad chance,
And we join to it our strength,
And we teach it art and length,
Itself o'er us to advance.

When thou sigh'st, thou sigh'st not wind,
But sigh'st my soul away ;
When thou weep'st, unkindly kind,
My life's blood doth decay.
It cannot be
That thou lovest me as thou say'st,
If in thine my life thou waste,
That art the best of me.

Let not thy divining heart
Forethink me any ill ;
Destiny may take thy part,
And may thy fears fulfil.
But think that we
Are but turn'd aside to sleep.
They who one another keep
Alive, ne'er parted be.

The kids today and their giant bears...I bet they have NO IDEA about this kind of romance.

February 13, 2007


Dear Brett,
I know you've been cheating and reading my blog when you arent suppose to.
That isnt fair. I am now going to pout all the way until tomorrow.

Your favorite girlfriend,

talking points:

1. You would have thought that the "Hershey's Kisses" company would have realized the relative goldmine that is the carmel kiss years ago. So why did it take them this long to create them?!

2. At the same time, it should be noted who came up with the cherry kisses?! Bad idea.

3. I'm currently watching the high school PALS ( Peer Assistant Leadership Subgroup...can you tell that I made that up? Its sad that I can't remember what it stands for considering I was a PAL...hahaha) do some sort of dance across from my office window. Have I mentioned how glad I am, not in high school anymore?!

4.I finished Season One of ER last night. I feel a great sense of loss. Luckily I've got well over ten seasons more to watch in the future. Of course, I am a cheapy and do not want to buy season two for anything more than ten dollars. Cheapest I've found: 17.00 plus shipping. Boo. Looks like I'll be waiting.

5. The weather in texas is beyond stupid. I can never plan what I'm going to wear even an HOUR ahead of time. I pretty much have stay in my PJs until the last minute in the morning.

6. Speaking of my PJs. I rediscovered my I *heart* NYC shirt from high school last night...its all faded and has a hole in the armpit. But, man its comfy. I have a hard time letting go.

7. Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God, honor the king. I Peter 2:17....this verse will keep me busy all day.

8. I find this idea really fascinating, as you know I am absolutely a fan of the blog being an account of our days. It keeps me focused on the IMPORTANT things, helps me number my days, helps me see what God has done in my life...you can read archives and see just how far you've come... But, honestly, a picture every day? That'd be hard.

9. I wore cute shoes yesterday. But I got a blister. If I hadnt gotten three compliments on them they would be history. Unfortunate they are just so darn cute. What I will do for beauty *rolls eyes*

10. March cannot get here fast enough.

February 12, 2007


So, I was on my way into the supermarket to pick up valentines candy for my bible study girls ( and some breakfast bars for me! woo) and there parked on the sidewalk RIGHT in front of the door was...a hearse.
That's right, a funeral hearse....and it had dry ice smoke pouring out the back....and big sign with hearts around it, saying something to the effect of "for your Valentine choose Vampire champagne"

and to really drive home the affect, next to the hearse was a headless body with a box containing said alcohol propped up next to it.


I may not be a marketing genius, but does DEATH really say LOVE to you?!

Yeah, I'm just going to go ahead and give you the answer to this one: No.
The answer is no.

I will not be buying hearse-champagne to celebrate anything

Someone should be fired.

February 11, 2007

A small tip for the future.

So, you really shouldnt listen to the song, Far Away when you're hormonal and your boyfriend lives on the other side of the country...
and did I mention that I was hormonal and the song has the line, "I miss you,
(you've) Been far away for far too long..."?!


You'll cry. And feel really sorry for yourself.

So, take my word for it....wait and listen to that particular song when you AREN'T hormonal...and your boyfriend lives next door ( or something).

The End.

February 10, 2007

and that's what I'm talking about!

So, I finally left my apartment at ten till seven this evening. And I'd had the most lovely relaxing day at home! its just WONDERFUL when you dont have to leave for anything!!!

Things I did today:
"deep" cleaned my kitchen. Now its all spotless and we'll see how long that lasts....I suppose I could just NOT cook...that would probably keep it nice for a while. ;-)

cleaned out my closet...this was actually QUITE the task, since, apparently I've lost various amounts of weight over the last six months or so, and so I've got about three different sizes in my closet at once. This meant that I had to go through every single item. try it on...look at myself in the mirror and decide whether it was actually WORTH wearing...or if I was just kidding myself, because I had spent money on said item and didnt want to give it up just because it was all baggy and gross looking. hehe.
Thus the pile of clothes on my bedroom floor that need a new home. meh.

I watched many many episodes of ER. which were made a good ten million times better by the bouquet of red roses that now live next to the TV ( have I mentioned lately that I have the bestest boyfriend in all the world? Well, I do, I just try not to rub it in...) that I get to look at every so often.

I got Kristy's bed all clean and ready for her. The single bed sheets had been living on top of the washing machine since Emma left but today they finally WENT into the washing machine! And now her bed looks very inviting....so inviting in fact that its going to be difficult not to take a nap on it or something in the next few days. ;-)

So, there you have it.....Saturday's like this do not happen often enough anymore and so I have fully delighted in this one.

Tomorrow's Sunday. Brilliant.

February 09, 2007

Sweeeeet Friday.

Yessss....I couldnt be HAPPIER that its Friday! Honestly, long week. Nasty. I've got a seriously hardout headache happening at the moment too...which isnt making todays coldish and greyish weather any easier to take. But, its Friday...and the week will be over soon enough...

This weekend I've got some serious cleaning and orginizing to do. Which I'm excited about. Why?

Because KRISTY'S COMING TO VISIT!!!!! yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!

I haven't seen Kristy since December 2004 when we graduated from University together and began seriously one of the scariest journeys of our lives. We both returned to our "the home lands"...where we spent the next four to six months writing emails back and forth and having emergency breakdowns on the phone as we tried our hardest to find jobs, get friends and make a go of it in the "real world."

I'd have to say that here in February 2007 we've both officially made it. We're grown ups. And we make big girl decisions on a daily basis. A lot has changed in both our lives. And honestly, being reunited with this dear sister makes me feel like celebration is in order. We've come a long way since our last meeting...and yet, I feel sure we'll be able to drink coffee and eat chocolate together just like the good old days...because, the truth is: Some things NEVER change.

February 08, 2007

back to the present.

So, the future is a dangerous place to be. I was just reading a dear friends blog and she went on a good old fashion tangent ( which I applaude, because I'm a personal fan of the tangent) about her future...and I just HAD to giggle to myself, because I had been through what she is going through now ( college! real world! grown up jobs!), and I can say with absolute certainty that she's going to get through it...and not only that, it'll be more fun than she can possibly imagine.....
At the same time, I havent grown up that much at all. I am very much in the same boat ( granted, just a tad farther down the river).

I had a good old fashion freak out myself today.

But, then it hit. I'm not ready or even prepared for the future, because duh I'm not THERE YET. God, wants me here and in the now...and that's totally something I can handle, because surprise, surprise He'll give me the tools to handle today. But, He hasnt given me tomorrow yet. And I need to be ok with that ( I'm secretly/not-so-secretly relieved), I need to not think about it so darn much, I need to not plan the future out so very very much, and I definitely need to NOT freak out about it.

Because it's going to be great. And the key word there is going...that's future tense if I'm not mistaken. ;-)
And right now, I am just happy to be here in the now.
Because now is really not half bad.

In other news, aren't you impressed with how many words I made italic in this post?! Talk about talking with emphasis!

after that,

My presentation is over. It was realitively painless. Lucky for me, I live in a town where everyone knows my father ( and loves him)....so as long as I dont TOTALLY loose it, than people will smile and let you off easy.

Now I'm watching ER season one, eating Life cereal, wearing my New Zealand hoodie ( as always its the greatest wearable security blanket)...
The weather went back to being all February-ish again. I cant really say I missed it.

February 07, 2007

What you have to do...

So, sometimes the only thing you can really do is buy yourself some flowers, eat some chocolate...drink water and just buckle down and do your work.

I should probably just go ahead and warn you, I'm going to be stressed until after tomorrow's presentation is over.


February 06, 2007

what's going on, actually.

So, in my quiet time tonight, I read this gorgeous poem in Streams in the Desert and I just had to share it, because it was perfect. And sometimes things are written and you think, wow, that was written just for me...

And tonight I share it with you, for afterall, it might just be for you too!

He will silently plan for you.
His object of omniscient care;
God Himselve undertakes to be
Your Pilot through ever subtle snare.

He WILL silently plan for you.
So certainly, He cannot fail!
Rest on the faithfulness of God,
In Him you surely will prevail

He will SILENTLY plan for you
Some wonderful surprise of love.
No eye has seen, no ear has heard,
But it is kept for you above.

He will silently PLAN for you,
His purposes will all unfold;
Your tangled life will shine at last,
A masterpiece of skill untold

He will silently plan for YOU
Happy child of a Father's care,
As if no other claimed His love,
But you alone to Him were dear.

E. Mary Grimes


Man! The weather has been so gorgeous the past two days! If I didnt know better I'd say that the weather is going to be good for the rest of the season.

But, I do know better.

However, I'm enjoying the sun. I just wish it was sunny in my office. It is SO crazy cold in here. Meh. I'm wearing my puffy coat INSIDE..and then I take it off to go OUTSIDE. That's just weird.

In other news as long as the weather stays this nice I'm going to be in totally awesome shape! I've been running every day that its been sunny. That's my new rule. Only do it when its sunny...otherwise what's the point? I mean, I'm not training for anything...I'm just running for the sake of running...therefore there should be SOME sort of joy to be gotten from it. And since I notsosecretly hate running...I'll do it for the weather.

I got ER season one in the mail today. I was so excited. Its such a delight to start at the very beginning of a show...hehehe.

So, I've decided I need a new camera...my pictures are coming out all foggy. And no matter WHAT setting, the picture comes out with something wrong with it. It makes me sad because I use to take such good pictures. Obviously my skills were lost somewhere between 2002 and 2007. ;-)

Did I tell you I'm speaking to the Kiwantis club on Thursday? Did I tell you that I'm oddly calm about it? And that the reason is probably some serious denial action? Did I also tell you that I dont like public speaking? Did I tell you that I dont really know what I'm going to say yet? And did I mention that I think waiting till the last minute is better for the overall affect, but that I'll probably die young because of the added stress that waiting to the last minute causes? And did I also mention that I've decided to just go ahead and die young...preferably before Thursday?

February 05, 2007

people get married every day. apparently.

First of all, it should be noted that my cousin, Ryan, is engaged...this is exciting, but also totally mindblowing. ( I dont think he reads my blog, so I think I can say anything i want)...Of all my cousins, I have always had this special "mind connection" thing with Ryan-and the thought that he'd go get engaged (to the most adorable Maggie I've ever ever seen, by the way)...well, its just so cool. And YET, with that being said: I can remember Ryan and I, playing with legos, and all sorts of weird imagination games that only we could possible understand... Like it was yesterday...and a part of me thinks that we havent changed THAT much... So, I just feel kinda old all of a sudden.

It'll pass.

In fact, it already has... Because, I just looked at all the work-important-stuff I've got to do this week, and I feel "meh"...

Also, I am discouraged about the pain again. I mean, honestly now...I thought it was suppose to be getting better? Or something? Yesterday was NOT better.
But, Steve's sermon last night was really great...pain just reminds me that this is all temporary. That this body is not meant to last. Heaven is gonna rock. But, until then I'm going to try and live better.

February 04, 2007

3 tramadol +3 aleve=finally. relief

So, sure...I didnt take those all at once, but over the course of about 8 hours. But, meh. Its been a bad day for the pain :-(

I am back in Nacogdoches after a really wonderful weekend in Houston, here are some highlights:

1. Conversation with Uncle Jim and Aunt Donnave. Always wonderful.
2. Hotel rooms with great pillows.
3. Getting lost with Anna, many, many times.
4. Not dying. Even though Anna doesnt "merge well" in traffic.
5. TLC "What not to wear"-three episodes in a row....
6. Central Market, humus, olives, cheese, scones
7.Cupcakes, chocolate, coffee
8. Swimming. Races that really took me back to when swimming was everything.
9. Brett's family. ( unfortunately, they also have the side affect of making me miss him EVEN MORE-if that's possible)
10. Overboard-Goldie Hawn's only good movie
11. Pizza at 10:30pm
12. "Anna summerizes Melrose Place"
13. Ryan's excitment over barbeque sauce and the six week count down ( can you believe it?! )

February 02, 2007

don't judge.

So, I just cried. Over the Valentine episode of The O.C.
I know! And it wasnt even that good! And I dont even really like Valentine's Day that much, its so cheesy! Honestly, I'm such a dork sometimes.
I also wanted to cry when my landlord called to make excuses and apologize again for making me so uncomfortable. You know, why is it that when people apologize like that I always feel so guilty?! And *I* end up apologizing?!

Anyway, I'm going to just go ahead and blame hormones or something. Because that's always a good fallback.

In other news, Papa and I had a really hilarious coffee date this morning. We were talking about first impressions-and how you can instantly make decisions about what type of person someone is just by that first moment of seeing them.
( Papa was trying to decide if he could continue to pull off the no shaving look...without being shunned by society)
So, after Papa had told me that he'd discribe me as a "slightly dishevelled" yet "stylish and creative" but a person who "doesnt like mornings but who's making the best of it, by drinking coffee" we went on to make up things about all the people that came into Java Jacks. ( although I'm a little offended by the dishevelled comment...I dont care how accurate that is, just because i dont brush my hair...does that really put me into that category?!)
Dont answer that.

Ok, so anyway, a tip for those of you who are going to go out and people watch this weekend. The best way to judge what type of person someone is, is by there shoes.
Believe me. They dont lie.

February 01, 2007

Just so you know...

I'm not in a good mood...not at all. Mostly because my landlords keep invading my personal space like nobodies business, and by nobodies, I mean nobody that i havent INVITED in!! I mean, good grief, if you're going to use my toliet at least put the seat down, and if you're going to walk around in my bedroom for, what seems to be, no good reason than at LEAST don't rearrange my decorations. Because, now I actually know you've been in here.
Which if you think about it, its pretty nice of you, otherwise I WOULDNT have known that you'd been in my house, and then I would have this very violated feeling that I have now...because...I know that someone-besides me-has seen the bras hanging on the door knobs. And that's not cool. Not cool at ALL. I don't care if you are extremely elderly and give off grandparent vibes....its still NOT RIGHT.

In other news, I'm in pain....which also makes me slightly irritible on the fifth day in a row....

I am trying to calm myself by reading ( starting in the archives and working forwards) this totally fabulous travel blog that is a wonderful story of traveling from New York City all the way through South America for an entire year......

It makes me wish I was a better writer...or the things I wrote about where worth reading. :-)


Ok, so besides the two years in junior high when I listened to Country music (because its what my sister listened to, and pretty much every younger sister in the world aspires to be like their big sister in ALL areas of life..) I pretty much get annoyed when I have to listen too much country. BUT, in saying that, I secretly loooove Rascal Flatts' song What Hurts the Most

There. I said it.

In other news, its February. Which bodes the question, WHAT happened the January?! I mean, honestly...was that the shortest January ever?!

I'm ok with time going by so fast ( to some extent)..for one thing I've got some totally exciting things to look forward to-for instance, in 15 days I will be seeing KRISTY!!!! Yay! I can't tell you how excited this makes me. Also, to be honest, the faster time goes by, the faster March comes. And March is going to be a good month...I can just tell. ;-)

This weekend is Celebrating Anna's Unemployment Weekend. Yes, my sister has finally quit the job that has made us ALL crazy for months on end. To be honest, I feel like I just quit, which shows just how bad it got! So in honor of her freedom, we're heading to Houston and then on to Beaumont...swim meets, family time, hopefully some Central Market-action...it's going to be goooood!