mustering of the mind

So, today I met up with Andrew and Cindy-something I haven't done in a month...and we discussed the past four weeks and the conclusion was actually a relief: its been rough. And that's not even on a PERSONAL level...thats just ministry-wise! Yet somehow just acknowledging that things were tough was really great. It reminded me that the Lord KNOWS all this! He knows how I've been discouraged and a little hopeless and that on top of all that its been the hardest month to date as far as this silly deployment goes. I heard someone talking about running a marathon recently and how the middle part always brought about a horrible hump that had to be gotten over to continue and I think that's what I'm feeling...I feel misunderstood and yet at the same time I feel zero inclination to try and explain what's really going on with me. I'm basically in the 'keep your head down and try to get through it' mindset...Its much easier to say things are fine then to have to find words and energy to explain this feeling...and yet, is that really the best response to a few tough times?


This morning I read this in my quiet time:

"Whenever a woman is in labor she has pain, because her hour has come; but when she gives birth to the child, she no longer remembers the anguish because of the joy that a child has been born into the world. Therefore you too have grief now, but I will see you again and your heart will rejoice and no one will take your joy away from you." John 16: 21-22

I was really stuck by this, because of what that promises in the greater sense...the disciples were about to give the rest of their lives to all sorts of hardships for christ's sake. They would eventually even give their lives for Him...yet, the promise is that it would ALL be worth it! That seeing Christ will be WORTH IT!

( This section also has special significants today since my friend Amy is currently at the hospital getting ready to give birth! hahaha! for her sake i hope these verses are true!)

Anyway, I'm going to rest in the Truth that all of this will be worth it in the end, and I will pray for myself that i do not give up hope, and that I do not give up on this life...no matter how tough it might get....this ministry that i feel called to do, my marriage...these things may not be easy, but they are ever worth it.