You'd think I was a certain 3 year old who keeps 'forgetting' to flush the toliet....JUST FLUSH THE TOLIET FOR THE LOVE OF ALL, ITS NOT THAT HARD!!!! *ahem*
Basically, I'm a little like that.
So, lets recap. I wrote a book. It took me years to write it and one of its major themes was:
"Look and see what the Lord can do when our own hands our tied and we can't do anything!"
I'd written all kinds of cool stories illustrating just how this was true and so you'd THINK I would have it drilled through my little bitty brain by now that I really should be able to trust the Lord with what He has directed. That if He's put something on my heart that I should probably go ahead and do it and trust that He will do exactly what He wants to do and nothing will get in the way of His plan.
But this week, I had to hit "Start" on my crowd funding project for my book. And I wanted to throw up. I really just wanted to beg God to let Brett and I do this ourselves, for the Lord to just magically fill up a Savings Account labeled "Book fund" or maybe just let me go the traditional publishing route and let some big publishing company foot the editing bill....but nope. That was not the Plan.
And so on Monday night I went "live" with my crowd funding and then I basically didn't sleep for three days.... I felt so humbled, so helpless....
But what I learned in those three days is that I have beautiful, and generous people in my life. Friends shared the link, they gave from their hearts and they sent me kind words and I heard beautiful stories of generosity and sacrifice that made me bawl my eyes out and within three days we got past the 60 percent funded mark! The coolest part is that even if I had imagined who was going to give, or how much the book would raise in the first three days, it would NOT have looked like that!
It was TRULY incredible! And for the briefest of moments I learned the lesson. I was confident in the Lord! I thought YES! THIS BOOK IS GOING TO BE PUBLISHED HOORAY!!!! I was singing God's praises! YESSSSSS!!! THIS IS HAPPENING!!!! YAY GOD!!!!
And then two days went by and I didn't get a single supporter.
Are you laughing yet?!
Because you already probably know the punch line, right?!
That Abigail is back doubting.
But really how can I?!? How can I doubt that the rest of the money we need for this book to hit shelves will somehow come, and not just arrive, but it'll probably arrive from unlooked for source? I'll have more sweet stories to share of how this book went from being, "my baby" to the baby of a whole bunch of people who believed in it and loved it too. People who identified with our story, who knew that it could bring hope and help to others who find themselves in hard times. In fact, every time, I look at the stationary ( but really BIG NUMBER) on my Indiegogo site, I hear this almost audible whisper.
This book is bigger than you.
And in reality not only is this book bigger than me, this story is bigger than me! All of this: the truth about who Jesus is- what He did for all of us- it was written before we even drew breath and its being written over and over again in all our lives. I put down on paper just one of those stories, but as I have thought about the sweet souls who have supported my book this past week, I see that same story written and reflected in their lives too.
In fact, I believe this so very much, that I can only think about the story of those 3 guys in the Old Testament who were about to be thrown into a fiery furnace and they said that they believed their God could save them, but even if He doesn't.....
I feel that even if this book DOESN'T get all the way funded, that somehow, someway, I will be able to see this book come to life- and I will be able to honor all those who have already given and we will all be able to celebrate this story of miracles together.
So, if you haven't already, head on over to our books site and watch a miracle happen!! Won't you watch with me, to see how in some mysterious and miraculous ways, this book reaches print?!?
(and if you haven't already supported this project- even if its just sharing it with your own social media network- pleeeeeeease give us a shout out, won't you?!)