June 01, 2006

picture perfect

I'm a mess!! I just cried at work! Dont worry, nothing bad...in fact, if you rank them as tears go...they were the "pretty" kind...you know, knot in your throat....tears tickling your eyes..nothing more.

But, I'm telling you, if I'd been at home I would have TOTALLY let them flow. There is no shame in THAT game.

So, the question is whhhhhy the tears so early in the morning?!

Well, its three fold.
And it began with a "Kodak Gallery" email from Kristy. 176 pictures of her holiday in Bali ( how GRAND is the internet?!) . Everything from airport pictures and plane pictures...grand scenery pictures, to locals at their outdoor market, to Kristy's sister's wedding at a GORGEOUS resort.

My thoughts on the matter, in my favorite writing style ( stream of thought):

-I LOVE to travel....I WANT to travel. WHEEEEEN will I get to travel again?! WHERE can I go?! I want to go EVERYwhere!! I want to experience new cultures and see new people....
WHHHHHY was I made this way!? Other people seem so CONTENT to have "normal" lives! And I'm not even saying THIS life is THAT normal...my life is great...but I WANT TO TRAVEL. Some might shake their heads...call me spoiled ( I am!)...I've gone to more places than MOST people! I really have! I'm lucky, I'm grateful. Its been almost exactly a year since the last time I went overseas. Most of the time I feel like I'm fine with that.
But, time and time again I get restless...

-Pictures of Kristy, ooooh! I miss my Kristy! She really is so special! Oh course, we arent as close as we once were, I havent talked to her in ages...that's just natural when you live continents away...but that doesnt take away the Spiritual bond that will always be there. I want the best for her, I want to cheer her on in whatever she undertakes...from the very depths of my soul I want her to not just be HAPPY! But walk RIGHTLY! ( because, that's more important!)And really, deep down, I wonder...will I ever be able to give her a HUG again!?

-Pictures of weddings...ummm....I admit, this is when the tears came. And I was a bit shocked with myself! "Abigail? Are you CRYING?!," I said in my head.
"Ummm...yeah...I think so!"
Who knows why...i dont even KNOW Kristy's sister...never met her, wouldnt know her if she ran into me on the street ( wouldnt THAT be insane?!). Whatever the case...I cried. Because weddings make me cry.

OK, back to work...

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