Well, here it is 2015! I'm currently sitting on my fireplace hearth getting as hot as possible without bursting into flames. Cold and rainy days like this make me remember why I love Texas. Texas in the winter. Not Texas in the summer. I reserve the right to complain come August.
So, here I sit, scrolling through social media as a way to distract me from the moaning coming from my 4 year olds room. He's clearly sleepy. He only does this when he's so tired he's tempted to actually go to sleep during rest time. And instead of just going with that urge he starts yelling that he's done with rest time. WOULD IT BE SO BAD TO JUST TAKE A NAP?!?!
I swear this kid has been afraid of "missing something" since he was born!
Anyway, social media is a flurry with people being introspective and optimistic about 2015. It's hard not to be isn't it? Looking back at the past 365 days and marveling at all that has happened: all the scars, all the victories, all the disappointment, all the tears, all the laughter...it's hard not to wonder what in the WORLD this next year will hold!
At the end of 2014 some coolish plans went into motion with some of our family members. The plans were so surprising, so completely crazy to us ( I haven't actually asked the people involved in the actual crazy plans if they had an inkling of what was going to happen in 2014...but for us, on the outside it was surprising and crazy and totally cool ) that it has gotten me thinking of ALL the crazy and surprising things that have happened to us over the years.
Here are some things I've most definitely said:
WOW. I can not believe this is happening.... That I live here. That I moved back here. How unfair this is. That this hurts so much. That I am marrying you. That I work here. That I am standing here. That I am doing this. That I'm having a baby. That we live here. That you are my friend. That I am doing this. That you are doing that. That I am a part of this. That we are having twins. That this is happening to us. That we are going through this. That they are going through that. That we survived this. That she is here. That we live here! That we met you. That this might happen. That THAT happened. That we've seen this.
I'm pretty sure that is the makeup of our lives...the sentence "I can't believe..."
Because life is a beautiful and complicated surprise. Sometimes the surprises are scary and awful sometimes they are the most amazing, beautiful things we've ever seen. Bottom line, you may think you know what this next year holds, but friends...I promise there will be surprises.
In 2015 we're doing some pretty crazy monumental things in the Wilson House. Because we always say, "Go big or go home." Actually...I've never said that, but roll with it. Because as it seems right now we're gonna rock "Change" this year. And not the Obama kind... Like REAL change.
That's right. My scariest word. The word that I try to avoid at ALL COSTS. It is my "word of the year". Change.
I hate change because it is so unpredictable. And I love predictable, especially if that leads to control. I looooove control.
And so, of course, this year seems really hard to me. Looking at all new and unpredictable things that are staring me down. BUT, if I just remember how truly wonderful a good surprise can be. And especially a God-shaped surprise. Well, then I get a little bit excited. And it makes me pray harder because I would really hate to ruin a perfectly good God-shaped-surprise with my very controlling-shaped-brain.
And just as a little reminder of how true this is: Let's just do a little case study SHALL WE!?! Read this post. Which is what I wrote at the beginning of 2012. I thought the year was going to include a deployment for my husband and a lot of single parenting. That year turned out to hold no deployment, a very scary complicated pregnancy and a period of 4 months where I didn't parent AT. ALL. So there. January 2012 Abigail was not thinking about the right things! haha! The cool part though is that God DID provide a verse ( noted in that blog post) that turned out to be truly important and helpful through the difficult year ahead. So. there you go.
So, to start off 2015 with as much craziness and proof that I have no idea what this year will bring:
Surprise number one: We bought a car yesterday. It's a minivan. It seats EIGHT PEOPLE. And no. I'm not pregnant.