not necessarily because of my readers ( although I do feel a sense of obligation to some degree to keep you informed)...but more because lately I've been getting more...ME obsessed, and while you might think that me blogging is pretty much playing into that even more, you'd be wrong...
When I blog I read all my whining as I'm typing and then I start to realize, "hey, abigail, you're totally a me-monster right now!"
Like, earlier I was trying to buy my very first pot roast...and I didnt know which ones I was suppose to buy...and all I wanted right then was someone to ask, someone who'd know...I just wanted to cry, right there over the Beef deep freeze. And I think I'm getting like that more and more-little things are throwing me over the edge.
I dont feel like talking any more. Because if I tell someone just how rotten and despair-ish I feel all the time they'd probably ask me why and THEN what would I say?! "Ummm......uuhhh.....I dont knoooow..."
Not going to cut it. So whatever this is, I'm trying to at least be honest about it a little more. I'm going to go ahead and tell you that I'm tired and hungry no matter how much I eat and sleep and that it doesnt seem to matter what I do feel kinda empty and drained afterwards....and that the least little thing throws me over the edge into total self-critiquing in the worst possible way. And, WHHHHY?! Do you ask, WHHHHY?!
I have no idea.
But, seeeeeeee, if I BLOG about it I'll realize ( as well as you) that its really not SO horrible....and that, in fact, its humorous... because when I actually tell you about how I almost cried over big slabs of beef in the commissary , I'm pretty sure it wont be hard for any of us to not see the humor in that.
So here's to me trying to get over whatever this is that's bringing me down and doing my best to be to make fun of myself as much as possible from now on...because we all know, that's what I do best.