( All from Romans 8 this morning...because, in the moment of despair-when you see no light at all, no hope at all...it is these Words of Truth that Promise more.)
There is NO CONDEMNATION for those who are in Christ Jesus.
We did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, "Abba, Father!"
We are ourselves who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. FOR IN THIS HOPE WE ARE SAVED. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
Who shall bring any charge against God's elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died-more than that, who was raised-who is at the right hand of God indeed is interceding for us.
Who shall separate us from the Love of Christ?
Shall tribulation or distress?
Persecution?
Famine?
Nakedness or danger?
NO, in all these things we are MORE THAN CONQUERORS through him who loved us.
For I am SURE, that neither death, nor life
nor angels
nor rulers
nor things present
nor things to come
nor powers
nor height nor depth
not ANYTHING ELSE IN ALL CREATING
will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
And so, when things look there bleakest and I am tempted to despair. I will instead choose to believe that the Lord WILL prevail. That Heaven will take the day.
February 26, 2010
February 25, 2010
Training in Housewifery
So, this afternoon I was doing some mindless projects ( mostly cutting out memory verse cards and coupons) and so I decided to watch a little "television" -online, of course.
I love how you can go on Hulu.com and watch all sorts of current shows, sometimes whole seasons worth without any commercials! But, today I'm having the greatest fun watching something a little more classic.
The old school television show Father Knows Best, which ran during the early 1950s. And BOY! How things have changed!!!
I absolutely love the nice wholesome values and the cute family life it portrays and I must say its a good reminder to see how far we've come in the past 50 years! So far these are the little gems I've enjoyed the most....
Scene: Teenage Daughter excited about "Girls Week".
"What's that?", her parents ask.
"Why its when girls take over government for a WHOLE WEEK! And I'm the transportation commissioner!"
Father: "I never thought I'd see the day when my daughter was any kind of commissioner!!" ( shaking his head and laughing)
Daughter: "What should I WEAR?!?!"
The rest of the episode is full of more "laughs" regarding the daughters worries about looking "pretty" for her new job and various men shaking their heads and laughing.
And now I'm on to a different episode where the mother is wearing "work" clothes ( paints, her hair up in a handkerchief) and she's trying to clean paint off her youngest daughter who's always getting into trouble. Accidently the daughter gets some paint on her mother's forehead. And right then you hear Father coming in the front door!
Teenage Daughter: "oh mother! You can't have father see you like this!!"
Younger Daughter: "You want us to let you hide in the basement while we distract him?!"
Seriously.
Anyway, if you'd like a little blast from the past check out these fabulous little episodes: here
I love how you can go on Hulu.com and watch all sorts of current shows, sometimes whole seasons worth without any commercials! But, today I'm having the greatest fun watching something a little more classic.
The old school television show Father Knows Best, which ran during the early 1950s. And BOY! How things have changed!!!
I absolutely love the nice wholesome values and the cute family life it portrays and I must say its a good reminder to see how far we've come in the past 50 years! So far these are the little gems I've enjoyed the most....
Scene: Teenage Daughter excited about "Girls Week".
"What's that?", her parents ask.
"Why its when girls take over government for a WHOLE WEEK! And I'm the transportation commissioner!"
Father: "I never thought I'd see the day when my daughter was any kind of commissioner!!" ( shaking his head and laughing)
Daughter: "What should I WEAR?!?!"
The rest of the episode is full of more "laughs" regarding the daughters worries about looking "pretty" for her new job and various men shaking their heads and laughing.
And now I'm on to a different episode where the mother is wearing "work" clothes ( paints, her hair up in a handkerchief) and she's trying to clean paint off her youngest daughter who's always getting into trouble. Accidently the daughter gets some paint on her mother's forehead. And right then you hear Father coming in the front door!
Teenage Daughter: "oh mother! You can't have father see you like this!!"
Younger Daughter: "You want us to let you hide in the basement while we distract him?!"
Seriously.
Anyway, if you'd like a little blast from the past check out these fabulous little episodes: here
February 23, 2010
Happily Ever...
So, if you're new to this blog or you need a refresher on things-I would highly recommend reading this post that I wrote a few weeks ago. There within I expounded up on the upcoming changes that the army was going to throw our way-and how things were not looking good.
In short, we were faced with several problems-One, that if Brett didn't take command of a company right away than it would affect any long term career goals he might have. Thus his plan of teaching at one of the schools here in Georgia wasn't such a good one anymore.
Two, that if Brett DID take command right away than it would mean we'd have to leave Georgia...meaning that he'd have to go into ranger school as SOON as he got out of the career course ( long story about why this is...just take my word for it), which lasts three months and since we can all count- that would mean he would miss the birth of our child.
Three, if Brett was take command of a company right away, it could not be guaranteed that he wouldn't be deployed again very soon.
Four, if Brett had to go to ranger school after his current course, the Army would not recognize this as my "home" and therefore I wouldn't be able to get on post housing for those three months...and since our current living situation ends in June. I would be homeless. And about to give birth. Without my husband.
Ok. So I know that all of that was as clear as mudd. But basically the bottom line was, THINGS DIDN'T LOOK GOOD FOR ABIGAIL.
But, I was very calm ( which you can read about in that above mentioned post) and I have stayed calm. I have stayed calm because I had a sense of peace about the whole thing, a peace without any understanding....God would take care of it. I just had NO IDEA HOW.
Until yesterday, yesterday Brett came home with amazing news:
He has been assigned a command ( taking care of problem #1) here at Fort Benning, something we didn't think was possible because of Army technicalities that I won't bore you with, but after Brett had explained his situation, they made an exception! ( taking care of part of problem number #2. no moving!!). The Unit that he will be taking command in will be getting back from deployment in September ( taking care of problem #3-they won't deploy again for at least a year!). And Brett feels that since they don't get back till September and usually after a deployment everyone takes block leave-it wouldn't be TOO big of a deal for him to wait and do the August Ranger school ( taking care of the other part of problem number #2!! He'd be around for the birth of the baby!). And since we'd officially be stationed at Fort Benning again, I should easily be able to get on post housing when our time here is up ( taking care of problem #4).
People. I cannot express to you enough that when I wrote that post about our problems I saw NO solution to all of them. I could absolutely NOT see a way for absolutely every one of my worries to be addressed. And yet. The Lord knew even then! He knew even before we could foresee that there WAS issues, how He was going to solve them. How everything was going to work out for good! It is TRULY amazing to me and I am SO excited about this news. I think I am actually more excited than I would have been if I had not seen the direness of our situation and so I am even grateful for those several weeks of not knowing. For now I can truly reveal in the Lord's faithfulness.
Its an Army Miracle.
In short, we were faced with several problems-One, that if Brett didn't take command of a company right away than it would affect any long term career goals he might have. Thus his plan of teaching at one of the schools here in Georgia wasn't such a good one anymore.
Two, that if Brett DID take command right away than it would mean we'd have to leave Georgia...meaning that he'd have to go into ranger school as SOON as he got out of the career course ( long story about why this is...just take my word for it), which lasts three months and since we can all count- that would mean he would miss the birth of our child.
Three, if Brett was take command of a company right away, it could not be guaranteed that he wouldn't be deployed again very soon.
Four, if Brett had to go to ranger school after his current course, the Army would not recognize this as my "home" and therefore I wouldn't be able to get on post housing for those three months...and since our current living situation ends in June. I would be homeless. And about to give birth. Without my husband.
Ok. So I know that all of that was as clear as mudd. But basically the bottom line was, THINGS DIDN'T LOOK GOOD FOR ABIGAIL.
But, I was very calm ( which you can read about in that above mentioned post) and I have stayed calm. I have stayed calm because I had a sense of peace about the whole thing, a peace without any understanding....God would take care of it. I just had NO IDEA HOW.
Until yesterday, yesterday Brett came home with amazing news:
He has been assigned a command ( taking care of problem #1) here at Fort Benning, something we didn't think was possible because of Army technicalities that I won't bore you with, but after Brett had explained his situation, they made an exception! ( taking care of part of problem number #2. no moving!!). The Unit that he will be taking command in will be getting back from deployment in September ( taking care of problem #3-they won't deploy again for at least a year!). And Brett feels that since they don't get back till September and usually after a deployment everyone takes block leave-it wouldn't be TOO big of a deal for him to wait and do the August Ranger school ( taking care of the other part of problem number #2!! He'd be around for the birth of the baby!). And since we'd officially be stationed at Fort Benning again, I should easily be able to get on post housing when our time here is up ( taking care of problem #4).
People. I cannot express to you enough that when I wrote that post about our problems I saw NO solution to all of them. I could absolutely NOT see a way for absolutely every one of my worries to be addressed. And yet. The Lord knew even then! He knew even before we could foresee that there WAS issues, how He was going to solve them. How everything was going to work out for good! It is TRULY amazing to me and I am SO excited about this news. I think I am actually more excited than I would have been if I had not seen the direness of our situation and so I am even grateful for those several weeks of not knowing. For now I can truly reveal in the Lord's faithfulness.
Its an Army Miracle.
February 22, 2010
Inspiration
Since becoming pregnant my feelings about food have changed drastically. My first feelings of ambivalence turned quickly to solid distain which turned into something of a multiple personality disorder and now we've settled upon something I'd like to call "Easily Swayed".
Before hormones were surging through my body, if you asked me what I wanted to eat, I'd come up with a list of meals that sounded interesting. But, as I mentioned a few days ago, now I draw a complete blank when faced with food questions. But, being a foodie at heart this is quite disturbing and so I am pretty much obsessed with food now.
This is why watching The Foodnetwork has become so interesting. It doesn't take much to influence my food mood and so I am now using this to my advantage.
Now, when faced with a grocery list that currently only has cereal and milk on it- I am turning to allrecipes.com and other recipe sites for inspiration.
Last night I made Roasted Chicken with Balsamic Bell Peppers and I definitely recommend it. Although, I though the Peppers were maybe a LITTLE too strong and next time I will probably cut the Balsamic Vinegar back a bit. However, the Chicken was awesome and I'll probably make that again very soon. The technique of cooking the chicken in a pan for a few minutes before putting it in the oven is SUCH an easy way to insure a super juice piece of chicken-fast and easy!
And now for my question...do you guys have any go to blogs or websites that give you foodie inspiration?! I'd love to hear about them!!
Before hormones were surging through my body, if you asked me what I wanted to eat, I'd come up with a list of meals that sounded interesting. But, as I mentioned a few days ago, now I draw a complete blank when faced with food questions. But, being a foodie at heart this is quite disturbing and so I am pretty much obsessed with food now.
This is why watching The Foodnetwork has become so interesting. It doesn't take much to influence my food mood and so I am now using this to my advantage.
Now, when faced with a grocery list that currently only has cereal and milk on it- I am turning to allrecipes.com and other recipe sites for inspiration.
Last night I made Roasted Chicken with Balsamic Bell Peppers and I definitely recommend it. Although, I though the Peppers were maybe a LITTLE too strong and next time I will probably cut the Balsamic Vinegar back a bit. However, the Chicken was awesome and I'll probably make that again very soon. The technique of cooking the chicken in a pan for a few minutes before putting it in the oven is SUCH an easy way to insure a super juice piece of chicken-fast and easy!
And now for my question...do you guys have any go to blogs or websites that give you foodie inspiration?! I'd love to hear about them!!
February 21, 2010
Whisperer
First of all, I do not have a dog. This should be stated up front because its key to this blog post. Its key, because I don't think my next admission would be as embarrassing if it wasn't for that fact. But, the truth is I don't have a dog, and I probably won't be getting one any time soon ( I'm getting a baby instead and I hear they are a bit time consuming too). But, these facts have not stopped me from becoming completely, totally and beyond a shadow of a doubt OBSESSED with the show The Dog Whisperer. I pretty much don't watch T.V. ( on the actual tv, that is) unless is a random rerun of Meet the Kardashians or some cooking show where people have to make something yummy out of a lime, a block of sugar cane and the hindquarter of a lamb ( its pretty much a dream come true for my pregnancy cravings).
Annnnyway, this was how life was until I discovered The Dog Whisperer and the genius of Cesar MIllan . I cannot get enough of his show. I mean, every fifteen minutes you're introduced to another biting, yapping, jumping, out of control dog and by the end of the fifteen minutes you've learned the dog was scared and unhappy or lazy or some other misunderstood personification trait and Ceasar has addressed the problem and BAM! You've got yourself a wonderful, happy dog.
Its addictive.
Anyway, after watching a ton of episodes in a short amount of time ( he's on both Discovery AND Animal Planet. excellent) I'm pretty much an expert on dogs and people.
And then I found out that Cesar's own dog, Daddy passed away this past week...and FOR SERIOUS I almost cried.
People. This is my life.
Annnnyway, this was how life was until I discovered The Dog Whisperer and the genius of Cesar MIllan . I cannot get enough of his show. I mean, every fifteen minutes you're introduced to another biting, yapping, jumping, out of control dog and by the end of the fifteen minutes you've learned the dog was scared and unhappy or lazy or some other misunderstood personification trait and Ceasar has addressed the problem and BAM! You've got yourself a wonderful, happy dog.
Its addictive.
Anyway, after watching a ton of episodes in a short amount of time ( he's on both Discovery AND Animal Planet. excellent) I'm pretty much an expert on dogs and people.
And then I found out that Cesar's own dog, Daddy passed away this past week...and FOR SERIOUS I almost cried.
People. This is my life.
February 18, 2010
I "Roux" the day I had that idea
So, a few weeks ago Brett was perusing facebook and someone had posted pictures of some homemade etouffe they had made in honor of...something Louisiana related-it could be any number of things this time of year ;-)
Anyway, Brett was all,
"Yum! That looks good! I want some etouffe!"
And I was all,
"YAY! Finally Brett gives me some guidance when it comes to the dinner menu!"
( normally this is not an issue, but since I currently range between not having an appetite and wanting to eat mustard right out of the jar...make a grocery list/dinner menu for the week has become an excruciating task. ) and so I went about finding a good/reputable recipe for Etouffe. I finally settled upon this one and I went to the store and bought all the ingredients ( except the fish stock, which I could not find-and so instead I substituted vegetable stock and 1 Tbs of fish sauce-found in your oriental section...this worked well. )
Anyway, so yesterday at around 4:30 I decided to begin my process of making this brand new recipe-something I normal love.
I mean, I read all those reviews that said this recipe was hard because of the "roux making" but I scoffed. How hard could it be to stir nonstop for 15 minutes?!?! BIG DEAL! I can do it!!!
So, go ahead, ask me how many rouxs I had to make before I got it right?!?
THREEEE!
That's right! ARG! The first one was because the pan I was using had little bits of the teflon stuff coming off into my roux ( the dangers of not having your own kitchen and using very old pots and pans), and then after changing over to a pot, I ruined another roux because I think my arm was at a weird angle ( and already tired from having now mixed for a solid twenty minutes) and I was using too small of a spoon....third times the charm. I switched to a wisk and all was well. Roux success!!!
And after that the recipe was a breeze and super yummy ( if I do say so myself!)...
But, I'm not going to lie. I may have thrown some pots and pans around and I may have grumbled some noncoherent words under my breath. And Brett may have gotten worried and asked me to sit down more than once, and I may or may not have hated life for about forty-five minutes.
However, at the end of the day ( 6pm) we finally had dinner on the table and all was well...although I totally needed a nap at this point, and I had to watch Brett eat his second helping from a horizontal position on the couch.
Anyway, Brett was all,
"Yum! That looks good! I want some etouffe!"
And I was all,
"YAY! Finally Brett gives me some guidance when it comes to the dinner menu!"
( normally this is not an issue, but since I currently range between not having an appetite and wanting to eat mustard right out of the jar...make a grocery list/dinner menu for the week has become an excruciating task. ) and so I went about finding a good/reputable recipe for Etouffe. I finally settled upon this one and I went to the store and bought all the ingredients ( except the fish stock, which I could not find-and so instead I substituted vegetable stock and 1 Tbs of fish sauce-found in your oriental section...this worked well. )
Anyway, so yesterday at around 4:30 I decided to begin my process of making this brand new recipe-something I normal love.
I mean, I read all those reviews that said this recipe was hard because of the "roux making" but I scoffed. How hard could it be to stir nonstop for 15 minutes?!?! BIG DEAL! I can do it!!!
So, go ahead, ask me how many rouxs I had to make before I got it right?!?
THREEEE!
That's right! ARG! The first one was because the pan I was using had little bits of the teflon stuff coming off into my roux ( the dangers of not having your own kitchen and using very old pots and pans), and then after changing over to a pot, I ruined another roux because I think my arm was at a weird angle ( and already tired from having now mixed for a solid twenty minutes) and I was using too small of a spoon....third times the charm. I switched to a wisk and all was well. Roux success!!!
And after that the recipe was a breeze and super yummy ( if I do say so myself!)...
But, I'm not going to lie. I may have thrown some pots and pans around and I may have grumbled some noncoherent words under my breath. And Brett may have gotten worried and asked me to sit down more than once, and I may or may not have hated life for about forty-five minutes.
However, at the end of the day ( 6pm) we finally had dinner on the table and all was well...although I totally needed a nap at this point, and I had to watch Brett eat his second helping from a horizontal position on the couch.
February 17, 2010
Sharing the wealth
So, "the boss man", aka Chuck Wood ( you should really check out his blog posts/mini devotionals if you get the chance, you won't be sorry) sent me this little youtube video that I thought was excellent!
Check it out:
Check it out:
February 15, 2010
Surprise!!!
Surprise!!! We didn't get to go to Maryland.
Surprise!!! It snowed in Georgia. It snowed at our house!! It snowed everywhere ( according to facebook status updates)
Surprise!! The movie Valentine's Day was actually good and not a royal disappointment! I was actually delighted with how much I actually liked it.
Surprise!! ( not really, but I have a theme that I don't want to ruin) the restaurant Cheddar's is royally disguising...I would rather go to APPLEBEE'S.
Surprise!! I had my first real latte in almost four months, and I didn't throw up! Take that, Baby Hiphopapotmus-hope you enjoyed that little boost of decaf!
Surprise!! My sister sent me cupcakes from Crumbs Bakery for V-day, and they were as tasty as they were adorable. Seriously...I think they must use black magic to make them that good AND shippable. ( totally worth it).
Surprise!! Brett got me adorable Gilmore Girl coffee mugs for Valentine's Day....how well he knows me.
Surprise!!! We ended up going for Atlanta for the night.
Surprise!! Even though I'm four months along in this pregnancy I still get sick if I don't eat IMMEDIATELY in the morning time. Thus the dry heaving in an Atlanta parking lot.
Surprise!!! Happened upon a wonderful little joint called The Flying Biscuit....Breakfast all day, if you go to Atlanta. Eat there.
Surprise!! I'm very much considering having a natural birth. I am now prepared for all your comments to go buckwild. Go.
Surprise!!! It snowed in Georgia. It snowed at our house!! It snowed everywhere ( according to facebook status updates)
Surprise!! The movie Valentine's Day was actually good and not a royal disappointment! I was actually delighted with how much I actually liked it.
Surprise!! ( not really, but I have a theme that I don't want to ruin) the restaurant Cheddar's is royally disguising...I would rather go to APPLEBEE'S.
Surprise!! I had my first real latte in almost four months, and I didn't throw up! Take that, Baby Hiphopapotmus-hope you enjoyed that little boost of decaf!
Surprise!! My sister sent me cupcakes from Crumbs Bakery for V-day, and they were as tasty as they were adorable. Seriously...I think they must use black magic to make them that good AND shippable. ( totally worth it).
Surprise!! Brett got me adorable Gilmore Girl coffee mugs for Valentine's Day....how well he knows me.
Surprise!!! We ended up going for Atlanta for the night.
Surprise!! Even though I'm four months along in this pregnancy I still get sick if I don't eat IMMEDIATELY in the morning time. Thus the dry heaving in an Atlanta parking lot.
Surprise!!! Happened upon a wonderful little joint called The Flying Biscuit....Breakfast all day, if you go to Atlanta. Eat there.
Surprise!! I'm very much considering having a natural birth. I am now prepared for all your comments to go buckwild. Go.
February 11, 2010
In short
Today's events should not have bothered me, but they DID:
1. During my OB appointment, PA in training couldnt find babies heartbeat, leaves me for twenty minutes laying on my back fretting before coming back with SOMEONE WITH SKILLS so that I could stop freaking out about my baby. 20 longest minutes EVER.
2. Sat in Hospital Lab waiting to get blood work done: watching four Lab workers play on their phones and talk to one another while only one worker works. I HAD LOW BLOOD SUGAR. I NEEDED A MUFFIN PRONTO. But no. Instead I had to wait another 20 min. before being "served".
3. Dentist appointment. Had a temporary filling put in. I have a tiny mouth. Having a MILLION HANDS in said mouth makes it ache and hurt. It took hours it seemed. My mouth currently aches.
4. Got the wrong drink from starbucks. I pouted. Brett bought me a new one. I felt guilty for pouting.
5. Its snowing everywhere. And THIS is the weekend we decide to visit the Northeast. ( I don't think its gonna happen.)
6. oh, and F.Y.I, throwing up stretches your mouth involuntarily. Even if one side of your face is in serious distress...it will still open super wide during that dreadful moment. Leaving you with more pain for later. AWESOME.
And yes. Throwing up here in week 16. ALSO AWESOME.
1. During my OB appointment, PA in training couldnt find babies heartbeat, leaves me for twenty minutes laying on my back fretting before coming back with SOMEONE WITH SKILLS so that I could stop freaking out about my baby. 20 longest minutes EVER.
2. Sat in Hospital Lab waiting to get blood work done: watching four Lab workers play on their phones and talk to one another while only one worker works. I HAD LOW BLOOD SUGAR. I NEEDED A MUFFIN PRONTO. But no. Instead I had to wait another 20 min. before being "served".
3. Dentist appointment. Had a temporary filling put in. I have a tiny mouth. Having a MILLION HANDS in said mouth makes it ache and hurt. It took hours it seemed. My mouth currently aches.
4. Got the wrong drink from starbucks. I pouted. Brett bought me a new one. I felt guilty for pouting.
5. Its snowing everywhere. And THIS is the weekend we decide to visit the Northeast. ( I don't think its gonna happen.)
6. oh, and F.Y.I, throwing up stretches your mouth involuntarily. Even if one side of your face is in serious distress...it will still open super wide during that dreadful moment. Leaving you with more pain for later. AWESOME.
And yes. Throwing up here in week 16. ALSO AWESOME.
February 10, 2010
our two laptops.
We're trying something new tonight. Instead of covering the kitchen table with his work, Brett is currently covering the bed. I must admit I like this better, because at least now we're laying next to each other-me watching Gilmore Girls, season 4 on my laptop, him typing some sort of Army Document on his. Its all very 1950s single beds like. But at least i can look at him this way...
So did I mention how we're spending the weekend? Well, I didn't because its still undecided. Not because we didn't decide, but because the skies decided to open up and dump large amounts of snow on the Northeast. Now, we are just waiting to find out if those tickets we bought to visit Brett's dad and family up in Maryland will actually take us anywhere. Ultimately I'm praying that if the weather is terrible that they cancel the flights...that way at least we won't loose the money and can live to fly again another day. I still can't believe we haven't visited Brett's Northeasterly family since we've been married!! I'm very excited about meeting his aunt and uncles who, so far, I've only had an internet relationship with plus any stories I can muster out of Brett....that's no way to be! So hopefully the skies will close in time for a weekend whirlwind of a trip.
Seriously, who knew this year was going to be so busy?!
F.Y.I. If you want to see something funny you should seriously go watch Gilmore Girls season 4, episode 7-"The Festival of Living Art"....Suki's freakout about giving birth is fantastic.
So did I mention how we're spending the weekend? Well, I didn't because its still undecided. Not because we didn't decide, but because the skies decided to open up and dump large amounts of snow on the Northeast. Now, we are just waiting to find out if those tickets we bought to visit Brett's dad and family up in Maryland will actually take us anywhere. Ultimately I'm praying that if the weather is terrible that they cancel the flights...that way at least we won't loose the money and can live to fly again another day. I still can't believe we haven't visited Brett's Northeasterly family since we've been married!! I'm very excited about meeting his aunt and uncles who, so far, I've only had an internet relationship with plus any stories I can muster out of Brett....that's no way to be! So hopefully the skies will close in time for a weekend whirlwind of a trip.
Seriously, who knew this year was going to be so busy?!
F.Y.I. If you want to see something funny you should seriously go watch Gilmore Girls season 4, episode 7-"The Festival of Living Art"....Suki's freakout about giving birth is fantastic.
February 08, 2010
Check it out:
Also, for your reading enjoyment, you can now read the newly formed blog of my favorite Housemate ever: Lindsay.
She has just been sent to Alaska by the army, so that should be fun to read about !!!
She has just been sent to Alaska by the army, so that should be fun to read about !!!
The Outer Circle
So, I've been living in Georgia for....about 3 months now ( that's not counting the time that we spent in Texas for the holidays). Which, in the mega scheme of things, is not a terribly long time. But it has seemed like AGES. One reason time is crawling: No matter where the move is to, one of the hardest parts of changing location is trying to rebuild the friendship base.
And while, for the most part, I think I'm making progress on this front-I was starkly reminded several times this weekend that I'm not quite in the inner circle yet. Being "left out" is one of the nastiest feelings one can feel, but when you move to a new place it is GOING to happen to you. I promise.
But, the really good thing about all this, is that its left me pondering my priorities. I don't think I told you this, but right before I left Washington-I was taken out to lunch by a girl in the ministry there and then flatly told how I had made her feel left out for a year and a half. It was an awful slap in the face and I can't even tell you how much I cried about it. But, even though I was terribly hurt by the accusation, I felt strongly, at the time, that I was not completely in the wrong. I mean, it goes both ways, right?!? I cannot be held responsible for every single person feeling like they're accepted and wanted at every single party and social engagement, right?! I mean, who made me queen of the social scene?!?
However, here I am feeling very much like she apparently did for a year or so-and I see very clearly how she felt the way she felt. When those around you are comfortable with each other, comfortable with their routines, their coffee dates, their friends, their date nights...when all of that seems relatively stable and set in stone, it can be difficult for the outsider to get up enough gumption to force themselves into the picture. And we are left fighting a inner battle where part of you feels hurt and bitter towards those people leaving you out, and the other part of you realizes that part of YOUR job is to be friendly and kind to everyone-no matter how you're treated back.
Which brings me to your homework: I need you to go read this post written by my friend Tabitha ( ignore the part where she talks about me...that's not why I'm asking you to read it-focus on the end part)
Tabitha's sentiment is that while she herself is trying to get out there and make friends, she's going to instead focus on OTHER people who might be just as lonely, or maybe lonelier than herself! I love it!
And she put so beautifully into words what I had been mulling over all weekend! I never want to forget the feelings of loneliness and outofplaceness that I have felt every time I have moved-I don't want to forget, because I want to be the champion of others who are out of place themselves. Because, such people are everywhere. They are NOT just in the military environment ( although, they abound here.), but there are people feeling wallflower-esque at every church, school, club, gym, social event, and workplace. And so, even though I feel shy and uncertain right now, I will remember the principal that my Grandmother always lived by....
My Grandmother was pretty shy, but you never would have guessed it-she always had people around her, and she was the champion of the wallflowers-Why? Because, when she showed up somewhere, feeling as insecure as ever, she'd look around the room and find the person standing by themselves, the person who looked the most uncomfortable, and she'd go talk to them. I know that's probably not a new concept, but its something I've remembered since I was small, and I have used it more times than I can count-and it ALWAYS works. You end up stop thinking about your own comfort and start worrying about someone elses!
And so...While I have not yet made it into the "inner circle" here at Fort Benning, I have come to realize that the "outer circle" is much bigger and has room for many more friends-so here I am.
And while, for the most part, I think I'm making progress on this front-I was starkly reminded several times this weekend that I'm not quite in the inner circle yet. Being "left out" is one of the nastiest feelings one can feel, but when you move to a new place it is GOING to happen to you. I promise.
But, the really good thing about all this, is that its left me pondering my priorities. I don't think I told you this, but right before I left Washington-I was taken out to lunch by a girl in the ministry there and then flatly told how I had made her feel left out for a year and a half. It was an awful slap in the face and I can't even tell you how much I cried about it. But, even though I was terribly hurt by the accusation, I felt strongly, at the time, that I was not completely in the wrong. I mean, it goes both ways, right?!? I cannot be held responsible for every single person feeling like they're accepted and wanted at every single party and social engagement, right?! I mean, who made me queen of the social scene?!?
However, here I am feeling very much like she apparently did for a year or so-and I see very clearly how she felt the way she felt. When those around you are comfortable with each other, comfortable with their routines, their coffee dates, their friends, their date nights...when all of that seems relatively stable and set in stone, it can be difficult for the outsider to get up enough gumption to force themselves into the picture. And we are left fighting a inner battle where part of you feels hurt and bitter towards those people leaving you out, and the other part of you realizes that part of YOUR job is to be friendly and kind to everyone-no matter how you're treated back.
Which brings me to your homework: I need you to go read this post written by my friend Tabitha ( ignore the part where she talks about me...that's not why I'm asking you to read it-focus on the end part)
Tabitha's sentiment is that while she herself is trying to get out there and make friends, she's going to instead focus on OTHER people who might be just as lonely, or maybe lonelier than herself! I love it!
And she put so beautifully into words what I had been mulling over all weekend! I never want to forget the feelings of loneliness and outofplaceness that I have felt every time I have moved-I don't want to forget, because I want to be the champion of others who are out of place themselves. Because, such people are everywhere. They are NOT just in the military environment ( although, they abound here.), but there are people feeling wallflower-esque at every church, school, club, gym, social event, and workplace. And so, even though I feel shy and uncertain right now, I will remember the principal that my Grandmother always lived by....
My Grandmother was pretty shy, but you never would have guessed it-she always had people around her, and she was the champion of the wallflowers-Why? Because, when she showed up somewhere, feeling as insecure as ever, she'd look around the room and find the person standing by themselves, the person who looked the most uncomfortable, and she'd go talk to them. I know that's probably not a new concept, but its something I've remembered since I was small, and I have used it more times than I can count-and it ALWAYS works. You end up stop thinking about your own comfort and start worrying about someone elses!
And so...While I have not yet made it into the "inner circle" here at Fort Benning, I have come to realize that the "outer circle" is much bigger and has room for many more friends-so here I am.
February 03, 2010
slightly nauseated
So, the question is....am I nauseated because of this BABY that is growing inside me and who hasn't gotten the MEMO about me being in the "TOTALLY AWESOME" second trimester that everyone has told me was "SO GREAT"....oooooooor is the nausea from all of the UNKNOWN life-changing decisions that are coming up today?!?!
Its a toss up.
I realize its been a few days since I've last blog....annnnd really the only relatively good excuse for that, is that Brett has been using my computer's video camera to practice the presentation that he's giving today and that he's been working 24/7 on for the past...two weeks. Seriously. I mean, I've seen Brett...but talking or carrying on a normal life has been out of the question. However, I have not complained ( I promise), because he's here in the kitchen.....and the fact that he just got back from Afghanistan three months ago has not escaped my notices just yet. Nope. I still remember. And I am still utterly grateful for any time that I can see him and breath the same air.
Ok, so right. Yes. Brett's been busy with his Captain's Schooling and I've been busy staring at him while he's working and then...BAM! Saturday happened.
Saturday, Brett and I are driving down the road and he's like, " Soooo, we should decide what posts we'd like to move to in June if I end up not working here at Fort Benning, because I have to tell them what I want on Wednesday."
And in my mind I'm like, "WHAT?!?!?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE AREN'T GOING TO STAY HERE AT FORT BENNING?!?! WHY WOULDN'T WE?!?!"
And out loud, I was like, " Well, I guess..." and then I started listing posts in order of where I'd "want" to go according to people that we know there, established Navigator ministries that I know of, and of course, location ( i.e. Hawaii).
So, yes, I was very calm.
And I was calm all the way up until Monday, because up until Monday it was really just a backup plan. That little list that I'd rattled off in the car, it wouldn't really happen. NOoooOOOoo.....I mean, me having to move somewhere right before or right after having a BABY...and Brett probably missing that Baby's birth because he'd most likely have to go to Ranger School before taking command...oooooh, that wouldn't HAPPEN! (!!!!)
But, then, Monday happened. The day that Brett found out that if he ever wanted to teach at West Point ( which he kinda did) than he really WOULD have to take command of a company right away. As in RIGHT. AFTER. THE. CAPTAIN'S COURSE. Which ends in....ooooooh. June.
So, that brings us to yesterday. The day that I thought. Geez. Wow. Army. It really does like to surprise you and turn your little world upside down over and over again, doesn't it?! So, I started praying like crazy and that brought me to my Bible reading for the day, which started out like this:
Unless the LORD builds the house,
its builders labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city,
the watchmen stand guard in vain....( Ps 127)
And you know what? That was just what I needed to hear! And sure, by the end of yesterday Brett had decided that he should stay on the path that he was already on, the path he'd already semi-decided on...which is to try and get a job here at Fort Benning. And while that would still have to be decided on by the army and so forth and so on...
I just went back to that verse. Because it doesn't really MATTER what we decide or what the Army might decide....THIS HOUSE is being built by the Lord. Our LIVES are being watched over by the Lord.
And yes, I'm scared at what just might happen...I'm scared Brett might miss the birth of our child, that we'll have to move to some new state in six months, that Brett will take Command and immediately be deployed again...these are all things that scare me, and yet I KNOW....with out a SHADOW OF A DOUBT that whatever happens, it will only happen because its come through the Lord's hands first. He will have decided. He will have prepared us.
Ok...the nausea is definitely coming from this Baby. NICE.
Its a toss up.
I realize its been a few days since I've last blog....annnnd really the only relatively good excuse for that, is that Brett has been using my computer's video camera to practice the presentation that he's giving today and that he's been working 24/7 on for the past...two weeks. Seriously. I mean, I've seen Brett...but talking or carrying on a normal life has been out of the question. However, I have not complained ( I promise), because he's here in the kitchen.....and the fact that he just got back from Afghanistan three months ago has not escaped my notices just yet. Nope. I still remember. And I am still utterly grateful for any time that I can see him and breath the same air.
Ok, so right. Yes. Brett's been busy with his Captain's Schooling and I've been busy staring at him while he's working and then...BAM! Saturday happened.
Saturday, Brett and I are driving down the road and he's like, " Soooo, we should decide what posts we'd like to move to in June if I end up not working here at Fort Benning, because I have to tell them what I want on Wednesday."
And in my mind I'm like, "WHAT?!?!?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE AREN'T GOING TO STAY HERE AT FORT BENNING?!?! WHY WOULDN'T WE?!?!"
And out loud, I was like, " Well, I guess..." and then I started listing posts in order of where I'd "want" to go according to people that we know there, established Navigator ministries that I know of, and of course, location ( i.e. Hawaii).
So, yes, I was very calm.
And I was calm all the way up until Monday, because up until Monday it was really just a backup plan. That little list that I'd rattled off in the car, it wouldn't really happen. NOoooOOOoo.....I mean, me having to move somewhere right before or right after having a BABY...and Brett probably missing that Baby's birth because he'd most likely have to go to Ranger School before taking command...oooooh, that wouldn't HAPPEN! (!!!!)
But, then, Monday happened. The day that Brett found out that if he ever wanted to teach at West Point ( which he kinda did) than he really WOULD have to take command of a company right away. As in RIGHT. AFTER. THE. CAPTAIN'S COURSE. Which ends in....ooooooh. June.
So, that brings us to yesterday. The day that I thought. Geez. Wow. Army. It really does like to surprise you and turn your little world upside down over and over again, doesn't it?! So, I started praying like crazy and that brought me to my Bible reading for the day, which started out like this:
Unless the LORD builds the house,
its builders labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city,
the watchmen stand guard in vain....( Ps 127)
And you know what? That was just what I needed to hear! And sure, by the end of yesterday Brett had decided that he should stay on the path that he was already on, the path he'd already semi-decided on...which is to try and get a job here at Fort Benning. And while that would still have to be decided on by the army and so forth and so on...
I just went back to that verse. Because it doesn't really MATTER what we decide or what the Army might decide....THIS HOUSE is being built by the Lord. Our LIVES are being watched over by the Lord.
And yes, I'm scared at what just might happen...I'm scared Brett might miss the birth of our child, that we'll have to move to some new state in six months, that Brett will take Command and immediately be deployed again...these are all things that scare me, and yet I KNOW....with out a SHADOW OF A DOUBT that whatever happens, it will only happen because its come through the Lord's hands first. He will have decided. He will have prepared us.
Ok...the nausea is definitely coming from this Baby. NICE.
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