Prayer Request.

Please pray for my cousin Emily who is currently fighting for her life soon after giving birth to her fifth child ( Sarah is doing well as far as I know). This family is dear, and with five children under the age of seven...Honestly, I am without words....but my prayers are coming out loud and strong. PLEASE pray for Emily and her family...
If you would like to know more and up to date prayer requests...I just found this website ( oh, the power of the internet!) put up on behalf of Emily.

ten fingers!!!

Awww, this is going to be grand! For the first time in ten days, I'm blogging on a full fledged computer key board! And while the iphone was able to keep you all apprise while I was away, and for that I am very grateful...nothing replaces typing with all your fingers as opposed to ONE.

Now, I'm back to rapid fire writing. And I'm back in Kansas. Kansas is sunny and its beautiful ( because Fall is the best time of year anywhere!!!), and I'm going to just go ahead and be grateful that I'll most likely be spending the better part of the next two months in Texas, since, while Washington turned on the pretty weather while I was there...I was not fooled. It was cold and it got dark at ungodly hours...and I will definitely be happy to only have to experience six months of winter and rain instead of eight. hehehe.

And speaking of cold...I've made a decision about Brett leaving. I need a hot water bottle. I was thinking a long the lines of how I'd lived in a cold places before without a husband to put my icey feet on ( seriously, he's a saint)...and so SURELY I could do it again, right?! So, I thought back to those days of singledom and snow...and I remembered just WHAT had kept my toes roasty...HOT WATER BOTTLES!!! Of course, I then had to think about all the times I had huddled up with my "hottie" and a cup of tea ( and the layers of fat I put on as well...gee, I hope I don't do that again!) and how I'd gotten through quite a lot of cold that way! So, it went on my list of things I needed to try and find ( while you can find a hot water bottle just about anywhere-with cute covers to boot-in New Zealand, they are near impossible to find here in the states where people just turn their heaters up ( recession anyone?!)...
AND THEN...just to make me even MORE in need of a hot water bottle, I was reading "Eat, Pray, Love" on the plane yesterday and the author mentioned that when she went to live on her own for the very first time, her sister gave her a hot water bottle as a house warming gift!! THERE! Its settled! A hottie is the answer to all my current woes about my husband leaving.


Of course, we all know that's not true...but that is how my mind works. After the inevitable tears-I swing back into denial-tearless mode and I start to 'fix' things. I'm already obsessing over packing everything up here in Kansas, and how the cars are going to get away from Kansas, where I'm going to get a job and live in Washington when I eventually move there, and of course, what sort of weird diet can I go on to lower my cholesterol. Anyway, I realize this might be hard for Brett to be around once he gets back from California. So I'm going to try very very hard not to be all weird and obsess-y about weird things. The goal is to try to somehow enjoy our last few days together, try to not think about what's coming...but at the same time to think about it enough to prepare for it, and to think about it enough to fully enjoy each other and not take anything for granted....is that even POSSIBLE?!?

I'm not entirely sure I'm mentally mature enough for this.

But, who cares...I cannot wait till Brett gets back in town this evening. I cannot WAIT.

Meaning

not exactly sure when I blogged last but it's safe to say it was pitiful. Of course, I was pitiful, so it all makes sense... The past few days have lasted an eternity and I've felt a little like I was drowning. And while we're not out of the stormy waters yet I've had my moments where I come up for air.
Like last night when I went to Bible study and while it was amazing just HOW many people I didn't know, I WAS reminded just WHY Brett and I made the decision for me to move back here. I am passionate about womens ministry. After of a week of loneliness,sadness, ackwardness, and weirdness it was as if faded to the background, I almost felt physically hungry to get back into learning about teaching and loving on people. I saw some needs and girls that I missed and new girls that I thought were great and I could hardly wait to get back here to get involved....
Of course, all the details are not clear- such as the minor details of where to live and where to work* but those are minor details. I know that this Love is no accident and while I am truly humbled that I have TONS to learn, I feel once again that this is the place I should be to start learning.

* today I went to a lame-o interview at State Farm. It was lame because it was just was just a preliminary interview with some HR chick and also because the job I thought I was applying for was closed to interviews on Friday. Also I felt bumbly and stupid. I hate job interviews, because even though I was not even that attached to the job- Its still like a bad date, YOU want to be the hot, desirable one who breaks it off. Blah. But no harm done, back to my original plan of not worrying about this until I actually move back.

And I am, I am moving back. It goes against all reasoning to come back to this cold, dark state for a year without a husband to put my ice feet on, but I'm sure of this- more sure than all the other stuff... Which doesn't say much, but it does say a little. And a little will keep me from drowning.

old news

well today, was interesting... Started well with a coffee catch up with a friend followed by a call back for an interview for the job I applied for last week- I'll be going for a test and an interview on Wednesday, so we will see how that goes.
As the day continued I spent a goodly amount of time waiting in the army hospital vortex waiting to see an overly talkative yet unhelpful doctor who in the end did give me medicine to combat my migraines but did not give me any helpful advice on how to prevent them ( I guess he'd be out of a job then, heaven forbid). And as an added bonus he told me that my blood work that I had done in June said I had high cholestrol. Awesome. I already eat pretty healthy and exercise!!! What more can I do?!? Luckily my trusty ( overweight) doctor didn't seem that worried... " it's probably hereditary"
So I guess my parents have been holding out on me! But even if my doctor is unconcerned I'm considering going on a crazy go nuts diet after Brett leaves.... What else do I have to do?!

just kidding

turns out that Brett will now only have four days of leave instead of six. Now not only am I crying about my husband but I must figure out how two get two cars out of Kansas- one of which has to get all the way to Washington. Carmi told me to take one day at a time when I was using up six tissues one right after the other on the phone with her- good advice but doesn't stop me from wondering how I'm going to get through the month of november .

lean on... Lead on

Well, after a call from my sisterinlaw I realized my blog is more of a ramble than a reliable source of information. Of course, I would love to say that things are going to change- but let's be honest that probably isn't even possible for me these days ( I hardly know what's happening myself). But for the sake of keeping facts alive.... Last night Brett told me that he'll be leaving for the big A on the fifth of November and with that sentence came a whole wave of emotion that I THOUGHT I was ready but apparently I was wrong. The fact that we literally have ten days left to see each other total ( including days he will still be doing training....) makes me want to scream, " it's not enough time!"
More than anything I am surprised by the tears- they keep squeezing out all the time even when I am talking to someone about something totally different, I feel so horrible and weak thinking of all the countless women and families going through far worse than I. Where is my strength? Where is my resolve?
In Christ. He is our strength, our resolve.

I have applied for an ungettable job at State Farm Headquarters, that with the help of my friend katies inside connections I might get an interview for next week... But honestly, being back here I am struck at how I had hoped God would give me some big " purpose" while Brett was gone so that I would feel some sort of comfort or drive to this coming year without him... But now I know that will not happen. There is no quick bandaid for this. Day by day we must walk, hoping for a strength not of ourselves.

How I know

So first of all this is a test to see just how annoying and slow it is to blog with on finger. ( via my iphone) so far I'd go with "really really annoying , but surprisingly fast" . In other news, I am in the great state of washington and I know this for several reasons:
1. I went to three different coffee places as a matter of course in just one day.
2. I had to get up and put socks on so I could sleep last night.
3. I actually see people other than Brett who have known me longer than a month.
4. I woke up at 6am and have not been able to back to sleep even though I am way tired. Stupid time zones!
5. I miss Brett terribly and it's not even like I won't get to see him again in two weeks! A year here, heck a year anywhere, without him is gonna be awful.

How 'bout them Apples?!?

So, as I may have mentioned before, Brett and I spent the weekend in KC...doing some much needed R&R ( well, for Brett anyway...my LIFE is R&R!).

Here are some scattered thoughts ( the best I can do this morning) about our weekend:

The Apple Store is evil, it sucks you in and you end up at the end of your weekend with an ipod touch ( for Brett) and an iphone ( for me). hahaha! Just kidding, I'm incredibly happy with our purchases, but I do feel like an incredible consumer having dropped so much money in one weekend...

Avocado Eggrolls are A-maaaazing! If there is any possible way you can get yourself some of these babies ( they're usually served as an appetizer) than GET THEM. They were positively heavenly.

The weather this weekend was beautiful! It was probably in the mid-70s and sunny up until we left! Yay, for Walking!

Brett and I like "hippy coffee"...the best coffee we found was where the ultra hippies hung out ( literally, in rows of chairs out front)-luckily, we drive a Prius so we showed them our hippy ways...

God gave us a Half Price Book store. We had found a Half Price using our GPS and were headed across town to find it, when we took a different turn next to our hotel and spied one less than two blocks from where we were staying! Stupid GPS! YAY! for taking a random road!

Of course, I now have THREE new books I want to read...which is always exciting! Especially since I'm going on a trip tomorrow, and trips need books! Maybe the library will have them...

We watched the movie "Body of Lies". I had to shut my eyes during an incredibly intense scene towards the end and I left the movie theatre feeling sick to my stomach. Of course, we should know better than to go see a movie before the election-every bodies got an agenda.

The next night we watched Wall-e in our hotel room. I was on the verge of tears the whole movie because Wall-e was not just cute, he was HEARTBREAKINGLY cute. He was like a puppydog and a lonely little man all wrapped into one. But, its a great movie. Just bring tissues if you're sensitive.


Our hotel was pretty flashy, we got drinks every evening from 5:30 to 7:30 and a giant breakfast every morning...oh, and we had two TVs in our room(s)...that's right. TWO. Because one isnt enough anymore. *rolls eyes*


Brett and I had lots of interestingly nerdy conversations-like when we argued ( or "talked passionately") about which was better fiction or nonfiction...or when we discussed where the TV show Heroes was going this season, for almost an hour. It was fun.


Buuuut, now its on to the real world...and tomorrow Brett leaves for California for ten days and I leave for Washington. I know my trip will be good, but its definitely hard to separate from Brett so close to the end of his time here in the states. Wasteful. Stupid army.

Time is flying by and I feel like we're holding on too tight. Lord help us to be graceful here at the end.....

One more thing...

If youMy Life Lessons From Meals on Wheels haven't already read my first post today , then go do that now...and if you have, here's something I forgot to say about volunteering and being neighborly...
From my observations, it is those who do nice things for other people that are the happiest. I've noticed that if someone isn't being productive and they end up sitting around moping the nice things that other people do for them never seem to cut it. That's because when you're being self-centered there is always room for more, more people could call you, more people could love you, more people could give you nice things...but if instead, you are focused on others and doing nice things for people maybe even less fortunate for you, I promise you'll have a better outlook on your OWN friends and family...you'll start to see all the nice things they do for YOU.

*end sermonizing*

Life Lessons from Meals on Wheels

In honor of my possible last week of doing meals on wheels I thought I'd share some of the important lessons I've learned from driving around delivering meals to elderly people 2/3 times a week...

1. People who make an effort to engage with other humans at least once a day are healthier.
Kids, this is STRAIGHT UP the truth!!! I could tell a drastic difference between the people I delivered to who sat and watched tv all day and those who not only chatted with me when I gave them their meal but seemed to be involved with friends, neighbors and family members on a regular basis....I also happen to know this from personal experience. Its not good for Abigail to be all alone with her thoughts ( and the tv) for days on end.

2. Don't be afraid to dress-up and look nice even if you've got no where to go.
I've got to say that the over 75 set puts the youth of america ( aka. university students) to SHAME. I'll drive down a street, nearly hitting five or six college kids walking to class, all wearing some variation of sweats and a T-shirt and then deliver a meal to a home bound lady who's seriously wearing the cutest costume jewelry ever. And while I didn't take a poll, I bet that lady felt better about herself for wearing those cute earrings and matching necklace....or the man in the wheel chair with a very nice blue stripped button down shirt that brought out his eyes...I am definitely convinced that making the effort on your appearance can make the difference on how you view life.

3. Open up your curtains!!!! For HEAVEN SAKE!
This is sadly, what I would say about 75% of the people I deliver meals fail to do. It'll seriously be the most beautiful fall day known to man, and I'll open a door into a musty and dark cave to deliver a meal. I quite literally want to drag the person out into the sun!!! Alternately, those who have their curtains open( maybe just in preparation for my arrival...who cares!) seem to be in much better moods and much more aware of the goings on of the day. Also, I might as well add, since its so popular these days, that its BETTER FOR THE ENVIRONMENT and saves MONEY, since you won't have to turn on as many lights!
Now, many of you may be wondering who I am talking to, since a lot of you probably DO open your curtains or shades every day, well, I've noticed that a LOT of single guys seem to sit around with all the lights in the house on and no windows open. I dont know why this is...Brett has not answer for me, although he fit into this category at one time. hmm.

4. Talk to your grandparents.
Now, I've always been a fan of grandparents, but it just reiterated it in my mind how important it is to hang out with them if you can, and call them if you can't. OR,novel thought, send them a birthday card on their birthday, a valentine's day card on valentine's day...seriously, any opportunity to send something in the mail, use it. I say this because, sadly, a lot of the people I visit with have been pretty well deserted by their families. But, you better believe that those who have, even the most minimal interaction with children or grandchildren, tell me about it. I see them for literally two minutes and I hear about the very minor ( in the grand scheme of things) thing their family member did for them....Now, wouldn't YOU like to be talked about, bragged about? And one day, wouldn't you like for people to remember to call you and send you birthday cards?! Heck! I bet you like it when people do that for you NOW! So, don't forget about your grandparents...they probably have some good stories to tell, and of all the people you talk to today, they will appreciate it more than everyone else. Stop being selfish with your time and do something nice!

5. Be neighborly.
Now, I didn't just learn this from Meals on Wheels, but from my whole time here in Kansas. I have met some of the nicest neighbors! People who cut grass, give rides to the grocery store, baby-sit, change light bulbs, fix running toilets, cook dinners, pet-sit, pick up mail, take out the garbage cans, visit people in the hospital and all in all are involved in the lives of those who live around them! Now, I'm the first to admit that I've not been the best neighbor in the past ( and I've also HAD the most evil neighbor in the world...so there's that.), but what a wonderful example of loving others! And it has made me smile so much to see some of the random acts of kindness shown towards Army Wives left alone with their kids, Elderly who are sick or home bound, or just busy people who need a helping hand! It is truly inspirational....and hey, you might make some new friends!

6. Eat Desert.
I find it really wonderful that meals on wheels, which probably states somewhere that they deliver "well balanced meals", also provides a small desert. Heck yes! I mean, come on! Sometimes eating desert is the best part of the day, so why hold back?! Now, I'm definitely not saying that you should eat a dozen cookies in one sitting, or that you should even eat something incredibly sugar...some yummy fruit might be nice, or a little "dab of ice cream" ( as my grandmother always said)....but I think if you can cut it, let yourself have a little "luxury" in the desert department, life really IS too short to be without chocolate.

7. Volunteer if at all possible.
Today on my way back to the Senior Center I started calculating in my mind when the next time I could be involved with the Meals on Wheels program, and I realized that it probably won't be until I'm without a job again ( aka. I have kids or I'm once again off somewhere for a shortish amount of time)-but believe me, if I have a chance to help teach a night class at a senior center, or do Big Brother, Big Sisters, or if I can once again spare ONE HOUR ( at the most) of my mid-morning ( usually most senior centers do meals on wheels any time between 10:30 and 12-and its up to their volunteers of when they go out.) then you better believe I'm doing it. I promise it will be rewarding and you'll meet new and interesting people.

Consequence

Today, I realized this might be my last week of doing Meals on Wheels. This actually made me realy really sad. This proves how quickly I get into a grove and how much I hate change.

Then again, I'm leaving Kansas for all sorts of interesting adventures...
Yet you tell me how anything possibly compete with today?!

Today I chatted with Florence. Last week we talked about her roses and how they were still blooming in October, this week we talked about her cat and the next door neighbor's dogs, Buddy and Boss and their ball ( I swear I did not make up this alliteration!) . I know it sounds inconsequential but the whole interaction made me think of my Memaw back when I was in elementary school and how she'd come pick me up from school and she and I would talk about the same sort of things. It was one of those happy/sad moments.

And on the note of grandparents...today is my PawPaw's birthday! I sent him a chocolate cake that I saw on Rachel Ray ( which is incidentally his favorite show...so hopefully I'll get extra points for that) I almost ordered one for myself too, but I had great restraint.

Pretender

Right now Brett and I are pretending to watching the Presidential debate. I feel ok about the fact that I've spent the past hour ( an hour I should have been watching politics in action) reading my old blog posts. Laughing. I use to be really funny. Or maybe its just that I blogged more. I need to blog more.
*sigh*
Evil Neighbor? COMIC GOLD.

Anyway, while I was reading about myself ( *cough* self-centered*cough*), Brett was reading a book written by one of our friends from high school ( yeah, he got it published. rock on.).

So yes, we aren't watching the debate like we should. But I already know who I'm gonna vote for. So there.


Oh, and today I found out that someone in London, England pretended to be me on October 3rd. That's right! And not only that, they bought over $500 in Train Passes with my debit card.

Luckily my bank is taking care of it for me, but I wonder which one of the presidential candidates is going to take care of bank fraud for me?! Its a problem.

love, love..

I love sleeping with the windows open. Tell me where I could move where I could have my windows open 365 and I'd totally move there.( well, actually no, but I'd WANT to move there...)

I love the movie Akeelah and the Bee, and I've decided movies about Spelling Bees are particularly enjoyable unless they have Richard Gere ( that horrible movie Bee Season deserves to be shot.) in them.

I love Leona Lewis. Here CD is worthy of a look-see, but her song "Better in Time" is worthy of an immediate download/listen. Do it.

I love the fact that the movie Fireproof is a really good look at not giving up on marriage and the need for Christ's love...and I am happy to say I was not embarrassed by the production value of the movie, which is nice....


I love that Brett and I are spending three nights in a suite in Kansas City this weekend. Pampering is always a good idea.

clarification for my readers:

Ah readers! Why do you put up with me at all?!

I'm sorry to just drop information on you all so casually and expect you to take it with a grain of salt...so here are some more details for you...

I was asked to be a substitute teacher for the Pre-AP/AP English teacher at the high school where my mother works. At first, it seemed like a dream come true-since it fit perfectly into the time I would probably be in Nacogdoches anyway for the holidays.

I started to get stressed out when I realized that my trip to China AND the substituting gig would not BOTH fit into the time allotted. So, after some praying I decided to give up the substituting job, since I'd already made plans to go to China, and family always comes first.

Then I was told that the teachers and administrators who'd wanted me to substitute teach, didnt care if I wasn't there for the whole six weeks...they wanted me anyway ( this shows how desperate they must be!!). And then I got an email directly from the teacher thanking me for taking on the gig and giving me some insight into her classes...so all of a sudden both my China trip and my teaching gig were back on.

And just to keep going with details...it turned out that Aunty D. and I could no longer go to China at the same time. So I emailed my cousin directly last night to see if that still wanted me to come at all and when would be best for them. So far, all I've gotten was "before January". So, I suppose from that response I could go any time...in the next two months after Brett leaves, so now its all about trying to figure out when the best time would actually BE.

~~~

So, there you have it, Friends! Hopefully that helps you be in the total-Abigail-loop. As you can see-my life is now about "doing it all". If it doesn't kill me-it'll make me stronger ( as in, I'll have lots of fun.)

All that Jazz

So, I just registered for an absentee ballot so that I can vote in November. Sweet. That's right. I'm going to participate in democracy. I was inspired by Leonardo DiCaprio and his advertisement with all those other politically correct actors ( I'm so being sarcastic right now). I mean, I take all my advice on big things like the presidential election from people that are fake for a living.

In other news, this morning after my meals on wheels route I sat outside for ages enjoying the beautiful beautiful weather. I am SO digging this fall weather! I am especially enjoying the fact that its sunny and the high is in the low 70s, both are things that I would probably not be enjoying in Washington on a consistent basis. I no longer take weather for granted. But anyway, while I was sitting outside I was also drinking my usual double tall soy latte, but with the added adjective of 'decaf' at the beginning. I know, its official I've sworn off of caffeine. Of course, its much easier to swear off of something like caffeine when you're getting, like, 11 hours of sleep on average. But, nonetheless, I decided to let go of my darling caffeine as part of my "trying not to have headaches" plan. I mean, it couldn't hurt, right? I also tried to get a doctors appointment for the week that I could possibly be in Washington but no such luck. I'll have to pray over my phone ( something that has totally worked in the past) and call again. Whatever the case, life is about to get busier and I think it might be hard for me to adjust. In some ways it is SCARY how easily I did NOTHING AT ALL for six weeks without too much drama. Of course, I would normally say something self-depreciating like "I'm lazy" but luckily my dear Aunty D, said it best with this statement "Not easily bored"...hahaha...so much more positive!

And on that note, it seems like the right time to bring up my current worry....it looks like the wonderful people at the high school where my mother works did not take "no" for an answer and they still want me to substitute teach for an English teacher who's going on maternity leave. So, I got an email from the teacher last night and I was totally scared. Apparently everyone is expecting a "mini" version of my mother to show up and rock their socks off with amazing teaching skills. Ummm....negatatory. In fact, being a small town and everything, the news has already spread among the students that the daughter of Wonderful Mrs. Abt is coming to teach Pre-AP and AP English. Uh-oh. There is a limit to how long I can keep up a charade of awesome-ness and I'm pretty sure a school day is going to exceed that time constraint. Looks like I have some studying to do.

Dude, its October!

I realized with a sudden feeling of panic, that its officially October! This basically means "get ready for the crazy!"

This weekend trying to hit up the OZ Museum (because if you don't go to a wizard of oz museum when you're in Kansas, when ELSE are you gonna go!?!), next weekend spending the long weekend ( yes, ironically Brett did not get Labor Day off, but Columbus Day?! heck yes! That's something worth celebrating...*rolls eyes*) in Kansas City bumming around. Then Brett leaves sometime around the next weekend to go to California for the end of his training, and I either, A. stay in Kansas to 'save money'. B. go to Texas for a visit. or C. go to Washington for a visit and a visit to the doctor for my migraine-action.
And then...we're already at the last weekend in October, which is officially the end of Brett's training-and after that....well....he'll be ready to leave whenever they want him to leave, and that fact is REALLY hard to sink through my little head.

I think going to PWOC bible study has been really good for me, though. I am literally surrounded by women who's husbands are deployed, who's husbands have been deployed and who's husbands are about to be deployed...and they're all amazingly well-held-together...oh, and did I mention that on average they have three children all under the age of 9!? Yup. So, its been very inspiring to be around these women, to see that my situation is not new, or different, or even that special ( I have zero children, much to everyones dismay.)-good preparation for the future!

Now I'm off to do meals on wheels. I got a new day, so now I do it THREE days a week instead of TWO! Woo Hoo!