rockstar.

I'm bored.
This has become a common occurance in the last week or so ( and shall continue to be so, probably). I get home from work at 4:30 and then from then until 6:30-till anytime towards 8 I wait around for Brett to get home.
I should PROBABLY find something really productive to do, but so far the only thing I do is cook dinner. Since my cooking dinner skills are not martha stewart by any means this doesnt take that long, bringing us back to bored. And since tonight I'm making waffles and bacon and eggs ( something you dont really pre-prepare for) I'm really bored.

Today I looked at all the pictures that I have been tagged in on Facebook...they span a good five to eight years of my life which is kinda weird to see all mixed together like that but here's a good one that wasnt taken very long ago...don't ask what I'm doing...who knows.-but that's definitely not productive.
So I made a comprehensive grocery list for Thanksgiving. I know its early-but I'm so excited about it, plus come next week Louise will be visiting (YAAAAAAAY!) and I definitely will not have time to make such lists....and then, low and behold it'll be the time to go shopping for thanksgiving and therefore now the list is done ( or almost...I am still missing a recipe from my mom.)

Anywho, my throat hurts. This is upsetting on several levels, one, I dont like sore throats-they hurt. Two, I have yet to have a week go by without SOME sort of ailment. *sigh*

This week is Halloween or the holiday which *I* dress up for-Reformation Day....on the way to Bible Study last night I constructed the easiest possible costumes for Brett and I....we will be....Luke and Loreli from the Gilmore Girls. This will either be funny or will fail drastically. I'll let you know.

And speaking of said Bible Study, apparently I am suppose to memorize TWELVE scriptures this week. Honestly. I've never been big on memorizing bible verses ( I am pretty good at paraphrasing them-and I had always felt that was good enough...) and NOW I'm suppose become a superstar at it in, like, five days. Christian growth, here I come.

oooo...I just got a text message from Brett saying he was going to be at work a "while longer"....its already 6:30.

Army Wife Tip of the Week: Do not calculate up how much your husband gets paid by the hour, you will only realize he is slave labor and that will only make you mad(er)...so just DONT DO IT...even if you ARE bored.

frustrating.

Pretty much nothing I wanted to do today happened.
I wanted to get the military stickers for the Prius ( FINALLY!)...and when through an two hour rigamaroll ( is that how you spell that? Is it even one word?!) that included a fire drill ( dont ask) to finally be told that because the car was in Brett's name I could not get the stupid stickers. BOO!!! I just need to go ahead with the inevitible and get power of attorney...of course who knows how long that'll take me to get done! :-( meh.

I wanted to talk to my sister. But i suppose busy lives on BOTH ends make this nearly impossible. I am currently using self control to not leave her more voice mails. ( after all I can leave a very long-winded voice mail when pressed).

However, while I didnt get the things on my short list accomplished I am making Kielbass soup-yay! Thanks to Stacy for the recipe...and I did visit Wes at his work at the evil empire of Starbucks where I got a FREE drink ( because I won a bet. yessssss. I am "vindicated" ) and I am making cookies....and Brett will be home from work...soon...hopefully....and then the weekend can finally start.
Boy, its been a long time coming. This week has been hard

How many words can one person make in italics?!

not fading into the clear blue yonder...just yet.

Some days I get scared that I have lost my creative side. As much as I love my job, it only uses my “relating to others” skills and my “coffee making” skills ( which are so newly acquired they’re hardly worth mentioning.)…so what if I’m becoming some sort of dimwit who is only capable writing in her journal to God, grocery lists and her name on debit card recites?
I honestly don’t know what I’ll do.
Yet, it seems to be happening. For one thing-I have a lot less time to blog…you see, I realized recently that while its possible for me to blog at work, this job is very different from my last two. Having a constant flow of customers, each different in personality, age, style, history-my mind is having to be a constant activity in composing communications with these people. Leaving little time to compose sentences for a blog post not yet written.
Its so sad! It is like a season is over, a season that was truly wonderful. A season I want back. You see, I didn’t just blog once ( often twice) a day…no… I blogged all the time-you only read a small fraction of what I was actually narrating. Yes, the truth has finally come out: I use to talk to myself and THAT was blogging.

So, now that I’ve identified that lack, I am just going to have to change my strategy. This is part of growing up: I must now be disciplined. Make myself compose sentences in my head-find things that aren’t off limits for me to blog about….I must TAKE the time to write this dear little blog. Because, I will not be like everyone else who has neglected their blog, slowly dwindling away until the writer and its readers alike forget it ever existed. No, if this blog ever ends-It’ll have a strong ending…an ending on the scale of Henry V’s St. Crispin’s Day speech. So there.

Ok, so now that we’ve gotten that life crisis out of the way…

Last night, Brett and I watched Evan Almighty. What a delightful little movie! I totally laughed and it had some rather nice ways of looking at the relationship of God and man-nothing I’d look at under in theological microscope-but not bad nonetheless. Steve Carell is fast becoming my new favorite comedian.
I also made Peanut Sauce and Stirfry chicken.

I realized this morning that I actually had two complete “nights sleep”. The first went from 10:30pm-4:30am and the second went from 5am-9am. They are so scarily similar in length I feel dreadfully bad for Brett who missed out on that second one. The one that really made the difference.

it is time

So, sorry havent blogged in a while. meh. Saturday I worked and then vegged out on the couch followed by a small birthday gathering at the Drakes house. Sunday was church ( I am still really liking Fellowship Bible Church-and am really praying about how God might want us to fit there...) and then off to Seattle where the following happened:

-went to the Science Fiction Museum/Experience Music Museum
-talked to Penny on the phone in museum, therefore saw hardly any of it.
-decided it wasnt a great loss
-got lost three times
-got heckled by drunken Seahawk football fans
-ate a fabulous milkshake ( strawberry cheesecake? yes please.)
-stood in a long line of Emo Children ( and when I say children, I mean under the age of 21...) ranging in levels of annoying.
-played "Movies that start with the Letter *blank*" with Chuck, Wes, Bethany and Brett while we waited for our long line to move.
-pushed through crowds of Emo Children to stand for literally HOURS to see three sets of music ( some dude not worth mentioning, Augustana-who turned out to be really refreshing and good, Dashboard Confessionals-so tired of standingandwaiting I hardly noticed whether I was disappointed or not)
-drove home very late at night, worrying about Brett having to get up at 4 the next morning.

Thus my weekend.
It was actually pretty good, and besides the bullet points very entertaining and memorable. If you need pictures to better appreciate it, see them here


However, this week is already turning out to be....trying. For one thing Brett is having to leave for work at 5, not only does this cut into sleeping time-but we've also not been able to have our quiet times together...this morning consisted of a prayer time in bed ( me praying in bed at 4:45 is really not very inspiring)...so that's hard. I am also not feeling very well-I'm kicking myself for the extended period of time I spent out in the elements on Sunday-and with only a light jacket, then getting overheated at a concert and standing up for hours...ummmm...way to take care of yourself there Miss I-like-to-get-pheumonia-and-other-illnesses-regularly.
But, I came home from work an hour early and slept on the couch for an hour and a half. Hopefully that helped. MEEEH!
Seriously, this 23 year old body is totally whimping out on me!
Speaking of which. I'm ALMOST twenty-four as of yesterday the count down to my birthday officially started. November 22 here we come! :-P

fridays. much better.

So, I feel I must write after yesterdays venting action....turned out Brett felt pretty awful this morning ( I didnt gloat about this at all-since its not like I WANTED him to feel bad) and therefore decided to stay home afterall-for which I was very glad....I will pretty much take any excuse necessary for Brett to get rest. And now he's sitting at the dinningroom table playing with his new Magic cards he bought on Ebay...so I think he's doing much better.

Work was also not horrible-back to my usual routine of making customers happy... without my boss there to see it. *sigh*...but anyway, I figure my tips speak for themselves...and I'm just going to be prepared the next time he's in the shop to be even MORE awesome.

As for the car loan, I called and got it all sorted out this morning-I even made a long term payment decision which I think is a good one. I'm relying on the math skills I learned from Mrs. Clark in 12th grade so, meh, what can I say?
I turns out I DID know more than the "loan officer" at the bank-she put me on hold to figure out our interest, during which time I figured it out and then when she came back on the phone she told me "the equation I could use to figure out my interest" in which she said "multiply by 365 days" and I responded with, "dont you mean divide?!"
I felt totally vindicated for the trial they'd put me through....

So, ok, maybe I over reacted yesterday...or MAYBE it was just about time I had a breakdown....hahaha. Whatever the case, I'm reeeeeally glad its friday. We're going to see Dashboard Confessionals on Sunday and I'm TOTALLY dressing up as an emo chick. I even have skinny black pants JUST for the occasion! hahaha...

bad.

Brett has decided to go back to work tomorrow even though he got his wisdom teeth taken out today. Reason? Because his boss wouldnt like it if he missed work.

I realized that the bank financing our car charged us a $200 fee for paying more than our monthly balance. 200 dollars. This was not part of the agreement. Or so I thought.

I also got reprimanded by my boss for: toasting the panini's so that the grill lines go vertical rather than horizontal. for not "finding busy work to do when you dont have customers". Not making a particular drink exactly to his specifications ( which I couldnt remember at the time)...


I feel incredibly like everything is out of my control. That no matter how hard I try. things arent working out as I would have hoped.

the land of the living

I promise I'm trying to take it slow...but I am just SO HAPPY to be back at work, back in the land of the living. I really do love my job-all my regulars asking where I'd been-the fun of juggling a bunch of orders all at once-the smell of coffee-the warm lighting that makes the rainy gray day outside look a little less gray-arranging the pastries so they look their yummiest...

My toes are currently painted a sparkly red that looks remarkably like Dorothy's ruby slippers from the Wizard of Oz, its a pitty I am constantly having to put socks on because my feet are cold-otherwise I'd be tempted to look at my feet all the time. Did I mention that its officially cold outside?! *sigh* I have already forgotten what "hot" is like....what I do enjoy is all the colors of the trees...gorgeous oranges, reds, yellows...I really need to start taking pictures-but I usually just notice them when I'm driving ( not the best time to take pictures-not that I havent tried).

I'm making homemade Chili when I get off work-one of Brett's friends from Ranger School is in town for a day so we're having him and Charlie over for dinner ( Charlie just got back from Iraq and we still havent had him over yet!)...my first attempt at really cooking since the pheumonia. blah. Hope all goes well, I think I'm actually TIRED of take out.

sleepin with the fishes

So, Sunday morning we woke up to a very awful smell coming from the kitchen....after a small amount of investigating ( "what's that brown puddle by the fridge?!" ) it turns out an entire bottle of fish sauce exploded in the fridge....much cleaning later and the smell is STILL HERE!!!

It is literally driving me crazy, I dont know if you've ever smelled fish sauce ( used in many Thai dishes and other asian foods) but it smells exactly like its name. FISHY. NASTY. NO GOOD. NOT FRESH.
Anyway, I cleaned the fridge AGAIN this morning, have three candles lite, and one Bath & Bodyworks plug in, plugged in in the kitchen and stillllll I smell it.

I'm wonder if its still hiding somewhere? I'm wondering if it'll ever go away? I'm wondering if life will ever be the same???

In other news, I'm going back to work tomorrow...I'm really looking forward to it, although, I'm a tad nervous that I wont be able to make it or something....that I'll have a coughing fit ON a customer, or I'll faint from standing up longer than I have in weeks...buuuut, I'm sure its going to be fine. Yesterday Brett and I went shopping ( Brett looks soooo hooooot in the clothes I picked out for him. hehe) and I made it through that relatively unscathed. So, back to work I go!

Did I tell you we tried out a new church yesterday? Well, we did. And I am happy to say there was NOTHING I disliked about it! Seriously! Good Bible TEACHING ( who knew this was so hard to find) and the worship was not dead and the people were extremely friendly and warm!! So, I am excited about future church-going....
I am also excited about Andrew's Bible study that he's leading on Thursday nights-and I'm actually enjoying the "40 days of Community" ( circa purpose driven life guy) bible study we're going to on Wednesday nights ( which is shocking...I had such a bad attitude about this particular endeavor...). So, the week is offically full and I'm also trying to be all healthy ( went to health food store today just to prove it.) and sleeping lots etc....so yes. That's me.

Oh, and Brett is getting two of his wisdom teeth taken out on Thursday...this means he gets Thursday and Friday off from work...this does not make up for the fact that he has to leave for work at 5am every day next week ( proving my theory that Army is sloooowly pushing their mornings earlier and earlier and their evenings later and later until one day Brett will not come home at all)....or the fact that he as 24 hr. duty the day after Thanksgiving ( meaning he wont even be home for DINNER that night! BOO!). I'm saying all this here because I know I need to be more encouraging and support of Brett and Evil Army-because I am continually impressed at his positive attitude, when he DOES have even the inkling of a bad attitude he's immediately all over it, putting an end to it some how ( with God's help)....so I must continually pray for help in this area too. This is life.

things to do while you're sick.

I went shopping today. Not that Old Navy counts as shopping...but the fact that I stood up and walked around for over ten minutes was a major feat....and then I "rested" in the movie The Jane Austen Bookclub, which I actually really enjoyed...it was so much nicer than that "other stupid Jane Austen movie" that came out recently...this one was present-day, not even pretending to be ALL UPONS Jane...and since I just finished reading "Persuasion" this morning it was timely....and on the way home I picked up Little Caesar's Pizza ( which JUST OPENED DOWN THE ROAD FROM OUR HOUSE!!!!!! YESSSSSS)...because cooking is still way difficult-and besides, I loooove LC.
In other news, Andrew Stroud-one of the Navigator leader dudes-called and his family is making Brett and I dinner tomorrow because I've been sick. How incredibly sweet is that?!
So, its been a nice day. And I'm officially going back to work on Tuesday. So more naps are in my future-all very healthy and recover-y of me.

healthy living...

So, I've gotten so many emails from friends over the last few days commenting on how I get sick so often! Boy, I agree. And last night, when I couldnt sleep I vowed that I was going to start taking a multi-vitamin.
I know. lame, right? Like a multi-vitamin is going to stop the pheumonia. But, SERIOUSLY, here people, I'm getting a bit desparate! I mean, I exercise, get good sleep, eat healthy-ish, I dont smoke, I dont drink....what more can we ask?!
So, multi-vitamin it is.

As for the pheumonia. I am officially, "out of the woods"....or something.
I went and saw the pulmonlogist (spelling? meh.) today and he was like, "looks good, very important that you got on antibiotics right away, you'll be good as new...oooooh.....around christmas."

Yup, long recovery period. Of course, this sucks because if you could see my bathroom floor right now, you'd know that I need to be doing more than watching Gilmore Girls and naping all day.... I hate making Brett clean things he doesnt even notice, but bathroom floors and bathtubs are pretty much not on his radar at all, bless him...they are on mine, unfortunately ( not for any one than visits us, however).
And speaking of visitors, this is SUCH a bad time for me to be "recovering" for 8 weeks....I reeeeally wanted to go to some of the fall festivals around the area, I wanted to go shopping to buy Brett a winter coat that ISNT a jersey hoodie ( how he's lived without me is beyond my comprehension...of course, I have three coats, two jackets and a million sweaters and look which one of us has pheumonia...), I wanted to go to the Dashboard Confessionals Concert at the end of this month ( but would it be RIGHT?! to be out so late, at a concert when you're "recovering"???), plus I've got to do some serious scouting work for the preparation of the visitors who are taking up the month of November ( yay! Louise, The Parents, Josh, Anna and Ryan....), oh, and did I mention I'd like to be feeling all recovered for my BIRTHDAY and THANKSGIVING?!
*sigh*
I'm bummed, being sick stinks.

In other news, my doctor ( can't pronounce his russian name) was very cool and felt like it was crazy that anyone even MENTIONED that I had TB....he also showed me my awesome chest x-ray, which showed my pheumonia ALL over my right lung! It looked incredibly cool, and also really explained why I cant breath well...

modern medicine.

It is amazing to finally take drugs that are specifically for what you have and are not just over the counter "feel a little better for an hour" drugs.

Today I feel moderately better than yesterday. Of course, yesterday was record low with me on the bathroom crying about how I couldnt breath followed shortly by projectile tomatoe soup....honestly. Poor Brett. I dont know how many stars he got in his crown in heaven, I lost count after about fifty....Anyway, so today I'm feeling mildly better, breathing a lot easier although my throat hurts-which is a new symptom. nice.

In other news, Brett bought me the sixth season of Gilmore Girls, and has even suffered through many episodes with me-only making snide comments after several hours. Honestly, what a great show. And I think it's teaching him even more about women-kind than he'd ever want to know.

Anyway, just didnt want to leave everyone hanging with yesterdays bad news....I think I'm going to live.

pneumonia

After a fun filled day at the hospital, one chest x-ray, one chest CT, blood taken from my veins and the promise of a TB test in the coming week at has been decided that I have...pneumonia.
Oh, and possibly Tuberculosis. WHAT?! How do you just throw that in at the end like that?! Because that's exactly what the good PA did.
She was like, "you have pheumonia, here's what we're gonna do to make you better, off you go now...."
and then.
"wait, hold on...."
and then 15 minutes later...
"and there is this other legend ( maybe like the Legend in the bible, I dont know) over here on your lungs that the radiologist didnt see before...it maybe TB...have you been out of the country recently?!"

So, yes, I'm not really worried about the possible TB.
I am a bit worried about the pneumonia and just how much longer I'm going to think I'm choking to death slowly.

Anyway. if you think about it. pray for me. Pray for Brett. Bless his heart, he did not sign on to be a nurse.

so then I ran into a poll...

I've been on a LOT of flu/cold meds of late...as in my whole mind is a foggy mess. So, that is my only "good" excuse for scrapping one of the two polls that is annoyingly two inchs from our assigned parking spot at the apartments. It left some blue paint on the front bumper of the Prius. I'm so upset with myself. And the worst part is having to tell Brett. Not that I think he'll be mean about it or anything...its just so awful to ruin something that's been all pretty and perfect up until now.

I'm coughing a lot in strange intervals. Last night, I would wake up, *bing* and be like, "why am I awake?" and then it would hit and I would realize I was choking and I'd cough and cough...finally I'd fall back into my "nyquil induced" sleep only to have the process repeat itself in the not so distant future of the night.
uggg.

hey, arent these blog posts fabulous to read?! I just realized that it may not be that interesting to read about my symptoms. So that's all for today.

weak coffee isnt work it ( I mean, worth it)

I am so weak. I stand up for a few minutes and then I really want to sit down. So far work as been ok. Slow enough. But, usually Tuesday mornings do not afford this much sitting-but I can hope for a miracle, right?

I was just told that people on the West coast get the flu earlier in the year because they are the closest port to asia which is where the flu comes from. whatever. I bet someone is putting my leg.

totally hot stuff!

So, soon after my last post on Thursday ( was that when that was?!) I had a very near breakdown at work...I had no idea just how HARD my job actually is, until I was using all of my strength to continue standing up right and not passing out-and then I realized that my job requires a lot of patience ( didnt have any of that), multitasking ( none), and a LOT of fast moving ( definitely not) ....it started slowly enough, a few customers trickled in, I was freezing and wearing three layers of clothing, but waiting on them wasnt too much for me...but then the line behind them started to get longer and longer, and people with screaming babies demanding toasted pizza-bagels arrived and I went from freezing to sweating profusely relatively quickly...
I'll leave out the details of me crying a few tears into my apron behind the counter, but lets just say I prayed for a solid two hours that I would be able to make it till 4:30.
I did.
I made it, and then I "lived" in bed or on the couch for the next three days....make that four, because today this is really the first time I've been up in the vertical position and I'm not really liking it that much, to be honest. My head is way stuffy and I'm coughing continually and while the fevers have subsided-I've felt way better....but I'm testing the waters of "living" again, just to see if its possible to maybe spread some of these flu germs other than on my husband, but maaaaybe on some customers, hmmm?
( but seriously, every time I was whimpering in a shivering/sweating ball I was also praying really really hard that Brett didnt catch whatever evil early-flu I had...and you can continue to help me pray this prayer, because as HORRIBLE HELL as it was for me, at least I could take the day off today...its way harder to tell Army that. ( I watched a lot of Arrested Development this weekend).

So, while I continue to push myself to stay in the upright position I must tell you that one good thing has come from this sickness ( not really, I stretch)...Brett bought a themometer. Holy Cow! In the Abt family that was possibly one of the greatest weapons of sickness a child could use-of course it was a gamble. I mean, no one ever ever argued with a fever ( even a teeny tiny one...my mother delighted in fevers) but then again, if you didnt have one your sickness just might be questioned and that could lead down a road you didnt really want to go down...buuuut, nonetheless...as a child who very rarely had fevers I always felt a little bit triumphant when I did produce a few decimal points more than your typical 98.6.
And, to tell you the truth I was a bit relieved that it wasnt all in my head and that my feelings of impending death were being brought on by the 102.7, 103.5 tempature action my body was producing...however the relief was short lived and followed by tears.
And speaking of short lived if this post seems to be ending abruptly that's because it is....my head feels like its going to explode. Apparently 45 minutes is my maximum time frame.
Back to bed and Season Two of The Office....