So, today was my first FULL shift of work. It was relatively painless, of course, I still have a constant babysitter to get me out of trouble if I get too overloaded, or I have a mind blank and somehow can't remember for the life of me how to do anything. But, never the less, I was still very proud when I sat down for my 15 minute break with a latte I'd made with my own two hands, and it wasnt half bad!!! SHOCKING!!!
I was so excited I texted Christa :-) This afternoon was extra nice because Brett got off work early. In fact, he tells me that he'll get off early for the next two weeks because his Unit is on mass leave or something of that nature ( I'm sure it has a technical name that alludes me at the moment). Of course, I will believe it when I see it ( Brett getting off early).
In fact, we bet on it.
I lost 500 dollars today since he did, infact, get off early.
I feel like its 500 dollars I'm happy to loose if it means I get to hang out with Brett.
Incidentally, in case you are wondering, Brett and I will often find ourselves differing in opinion on various things ( shocking, I know) but at times like that we will often bet on who is right. We always bet $500 because its a nice number. I am sure one day I'll call in my debts and Brett will owe me thousands but till then I'm happy to rest in the fact that I am right (sometimes). ;-)
Soooo, this afternoon was good. We went and saw Transformers. Brett had already seen it with his brothers, but I felt like I needed to experience the movie too. I am really glad I did. It gave me such a clear picture of what Brett was like as a little boy ;-)
We also got mail today. Really good mail ( not just circulars for Target and RiteAid). I got a REAL letter from Esther. Which, of course, made me miss her terribly. And we got two books from my parents!!! Yay!!!
Of course, two new books puts me in quite the moral quandary (ummm...not really). Since, just yesterday I realized I was currently reading four books at once-something I NEVER do!!!! I decided then and there I would focus on one until it was through and then move on to the next and so on...
but now, now I am EVER so tempted to start yet another one. Just a taste...
August 20, 2007
August 19, 2007
gah!!
I KNOW! I said I was going to post every day! And then I didn't.
Horrible.
But, I have excuses:
Brett finally returned to me ( in all his stinky-I-havent-showered-in-three-days glory) on Thursday night...and so I got to see him for a few hours before Friday happened and I spent ALLLLL DAAAAAAAY in the apartment by myself watching Lonely Girl 15 on Youtube-yes I am that lame. ( weather wasnt the best and brett took the car to work. boo.)
Once again, this whole being couped up with no life did wonders for my personality and I was an absolute DE-light when Brett got home from work ( sarcasm included). poor guy.
But, I had to pray hard because almost immediately after getting home from work we had to head to a work-FUNCTION. Meaning, *i* had to go and meet all sorts of people, people Brett works with, Brett's bosses....it wasnt a DREADFUL time by any means, but combine my already negative attitude + freezing weather+ forced to be outdoors at a "picnic" +food being an hour and a half late+ meeting new people and well....it was hard.
I am, however, glad that I got to put some faces with some names...and it was kind of interesting to be able to make some first impressions for myself about these people that Brett spends MOST of his time with.
Oh. And the Brigade gave me flowers to welcome me. awwwwwww.
In other news, yesterday Brett and I were absolute grown ups. We bought a car.
Yup, we sure did. And now, for better or for worse we are the proud owners of a 2007 Toyota Prius Hybrid. We got a pretty good deal since the car had already had one owner who had driven the car for a grand total of 2,000 miles. hehehe. So, that worked out. Of course, I always said I would NEVER EVER buy a white car ( since that is pretty much the only thing my parents drive and you know what they say about kids rebelling....) buuuut....you'd be surprised what the enticements of a good deal will do to change your opinion.
Ok! So now you're officially caught up on my ultra exciting life and times. I think Brett and I are going to see Transformers this afternoon ( I STILL havent seen it!) as part of a winding down process in preparation for next week. Tomorrow. First day of official work.
Horrible.
But, I have excuses:
Brett finally returned to me ( in all his stinky-I-havent-showered-in-three-days glory) on Thursday night...and so I got to see him for a few hours before Friday happened and I spent ALLLLL DAAAAAAAY in the apartment by myself watching Lonely Girl 15 on Youtube-yes I am that lame. ( weather wasnt the best and brett took the car to work. boo.)
Once again, this whole being couped up with no life did wonders for my personality and I was an absolute DE-light when Brett got home from work ( sarcasm included). poor guy.
But, I had to pray hard because almost immediately after getting home from work we had to head to a work-FUNCTION. Meaning, *i* had to go and meet all sorts of people, people Brett works with, Brett's bosses....it wasnt a DREADFUL time by any means, but combine my already negative attitude + freezing weather+ forced to be outdoors at a "picnic" +food being an hour and a half late+ meeting new people and well....it was hard.
I am, however, glad that I got to put some faces with some names...and it was kind of interesting to be able to make some first impressions for myself about these people that Brett spends MOST of his time with.
Oh. And the Brigade gave me flowers to welcome me. awwwwwww.
In other news, yesterday Brett and I were absolute grown ups. We bought a car.
Yup, we sure did. And now, for better or for worse we are the proud owners of a 2007 Toyota Prius Hybrid. We got a pretty good deal since the car had already had one owner who had driven the car for a grand total of 2,000 miles. hehehe. So, that worked out. Of course, I always said I would NEVER EVER buy a white car ( since that is pretty much the only thing my parents drive and you know what they say about kids rebelling....) buuuut....you'd be surprised what the enticements of a good deal will do to change your opinion.
Ok! So now you're officially caught up on my ultra exciting life and times. I think Brett and I are going to see Transformers this afternoon ( I STILL havent seen it!) as part of a winding down process in preparation for next week. Tomorrow. First day of official work.
August 15, 2007
another day, another post
So, I PROMISED I would post more, so here I am with nothing interesting to tell you, except that I successfully got vehicle registration from the Department of Defense....the ol' taurus can now frequent any military base it wants to. so there.
The other exciting things I did today include:
I bought a Brita filter....for the faucet. How UPSCALE is that!?! I know, I was shocked at the luxury too. But, I thought, what the heck it was 5 dollars off...
Ironically, I told a possible-friend-candidate ( as in, I like her...but will SHE like ME?! ) that I would help her sort out her budget.
I'm going with the mantra "what you can't do. teach."
Other than that, I am trying desparately to find season 5 of ER. I mean, I could buy it on Amazon but that would take a while to get. I need instant gratification. My husband is still gone.
I can't even talk to him. Apparently "the field" is in some sort of cell phone void. I'm not complaining. I promise. I realize that sometime very soon Brett will be gone for a LOT longer than 3 days...and I plan to really save up my crying time for then. So, yeah.
The other exciting things I did today include:
I bought a Brita filter....for the faucet. How UPSCALE is that!?! I know, I was shocked at the luxury too. But, I thought, what the heck it was 5 dollars off...
Ironically, I told a possible-friend-candidate ( as in, I like her...but will SHE like ME?! ) that I would help her sort out her budget.
I'm going with the mantra "what you can't do. teach."
Other than that, I am trying desparately to find season 5 of ER. I mean, I could buy it on Amazon but that would take a while to get. I need instant gratification. My husband is still gone.
I can't even talk to him. Apparently "the field" is in some sort of cell phone void. I'm not complaining. I promise. I realize that sometime very soon Brett will be gone for a LOT longer than 3 days...and I plan to really save up my crying time for then. So, yeah.
August 14, 2007
happy one month anniversary, love the army
So, today Brett and I have been married for one whole month. WOO.
The army gave us the special gift of taking away my husband for three whole days. Boo.
I think it hits me in weird waves that life is so incredibly different, and that my only real friend is my husband and he's not around very often at all...at times I get overwhelmed at the enormity of all the changes.
I want to make friends, I want to find a place in a church or something of that nature, I want to find where I fit with Brett's friends, with Brett's work, with my own work....there is so much that I feel completely at a loss about.
Last night I couldnt sleep so I was reading "Gold Cord" by Amy Carmichael and I was reminded ( strangely, because it was not in context) of a verse that God gave me when I first returned to the US from New Zealand and was faced with many of these same issues ( homesickness, friendlessness, a loss of where you fit...)
Jeremiah 17:7-8
But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.
He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit."
For some reason, I thought that just because I had done this homesickness/total newness/let's start life over business TWICE before that it would be easier this time. And maybe in some ways it is...yet, it still is incredibly real pain to miss you best friends, to want someone to watch movies with and eat pizza with, someone who knows all your back story, people who have seen you cry...
and I feel JUST as lost and directionless now as I ever did when I first arrived in New Zealand...or when I got back to Texas.
Oh, but it is easier, isnt it? It is because of verses like "He named it Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far has the LORD helped us."
How true that is...
In other news, I had my second day of coffee shop training today. It was actually way more fun than yesterday- I learned how to make drinks!!! I start my first REAL shift on monday...6:45 till 1pm. Whew! Talk about baptism by fire, huh?!
The army gave us the special gift of taking away my husband for three whole days. Boo.
I think it hits me in weird waves that life is so incredibly different, and that my only real friend is my husband and he's not around very often at all...at times I get overwhelmed at the enormity of all the changes.
I want to make friends, I want to find a place in a church or something of that nature, I want to find where I fit with Brett's friends, with Brett's work, with my own work....there is so much that I feel completely at a loss about.
Last night I couldnt sleep so I was reading "Gold Cord" by Amy Carmichael and I was reminded ( strangely, because it was not in context) of a verse that God gave me when I first returned to the US from New Zealand and was faced with many of these same issues ( homesickness, friendlessness, a loss of where you fit...)
Jeremiah 17:7-8
But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.
He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit."
For some reason, I thought that just because I had done this homesickness/total newness/let's start life over business TWICE before that it would be easier this time. And maybe in some ways it is...yet, it still is incredibly real pain to miss you best friends, to want someone to watch movies with and eat pizza with, someone who knows all your back story, people who have seen you cry...
and I feel JUST as lost and directionless now as I ever did when I first arrived in New Zealand...or when I got back to Texas.
Oh, but it is easier, isnt it? It is because of verses like "He named it Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far has the LORD helped us."
How true that is...
In other news, I had my second day of coffee shop training today. It was actually way more fun than yesterday- I learned how to make drinks!!! I start my first REAL shift on monday...6:45 till 1pm. Whew! Talk about baptism by fire, huh?!
August 13, 2007
morning start
So, this morning as I was driving back from dropping Brett off at the gate ( we havent gotten my car registered yet because you cant just have the registration sticker on the car, you have to have some sort of paper too! Thanks for being difficult, Army, thanks.) at 5:45am I decided to become a morning person.
In fact, I was pretty sure I was 90% there as it was.
Criteria to being a morning person:
1. Be awake in early morning hours. ( check)
2. Speak in sentences during early morning hours, not including grunts or snarls ( check, check)
3. Actually get out of bed and do something worthwhile (check, I got up, had a quiet time and drove )
4. Be cheerful.
Yes. It was the last one that got me. I was definitely not cheerful. But, I DO think that 3 out of four isnt bad!!!
And I think I was mostly not cheerful because my stomach is upset. BOO!!! I'm blaming the chinese food, cupcakes and wine that I had last night
( dont judge, when pretty much the only person you know has been doing Arabic lessons for EIGHT HOURS STRAIGHT and you've watched TEN episodes of ER and written FIVE thank you notes...YOU'D make extra huge cupcakes and drink the last two glasses of wine while doing so, too!)
*ahem*
Today, I start my job at the coffee shop. I've been mildly surprised by some of the responses I've gotten from people about taking this job. Mostly, the ones that urge me not to take it unless I can move up to middle management really soon, and own the company by the end of the year.
HEEELLLOOOOO! Do you know me at all?! I dont WANT to own a coffee shop ( or even RUN one!!) . I want to work in one, I want to talk to the people without having to worry if the staff is getting their paychecks, or if someone paid the rent....its just like Carrie Weaver on ER. She got the head management job that she always wanted and then she hardly got to practice medicine anymore....
I cant believe I just used ER as my example...
In fact, I was pretty sure I was 90% there as it was.
Criteria to being a morning person:
1. Be awake in early morning hours. ( check)
2. Speak in sentences during early morning hours, not including grunts or snarls ( check, check)
3. Actually get out of bed and do something worthwhile (check, I got up, had a quiet time and drove )
4. Be cheerful.
Yes. It was the last one that got me. I was definitely not cheerful. But, I DO think that 3 out of four isnt bad!!!
And I think I was mostly not cheerful because my stomach is upset. BOO!!! I'm blaming the chinese food, cupcakes and wine that I had last night
( dont judge, when pretty much the only person you know has been doing Arabic lessons for EIGHT HOURS STRAIGHT and you've watched TEN episodes of ER and written FIVE thank you notes...YOU'D make extra huge cupcakes and drink the last two glasses of wine while doing so, too!)
*ahem*
Today, I start my job at the coffee shop. I've been mildly surprised by some of the responses I've gotten from people about taking this job. Mostly, the ones that urge me not to take it unless I can move up to middle management really soon, and own the company by the end of the year.
HEEELLLOOOOO! Do you know me at all?! I dont WANT to own a coffee shop ( or even RUN one!!) . I want to work in one, I want to talk to the people without having to worry if the staff is getting their paychecks, or if someone paid the rent....its just like Carrie Weaver on ER. She got the head management job that she always wanted and then she hardly got to practice medicine anymore....
I cant believe I just used ER as my example...
August 12, 2007
next week=devotion to blogging.
On Friday afternoon God took very good care of my mental health by sending me two phone calls from Carmi and Thida...both a surprise. It a miracle they called when they did because Brett didnt get home until 8:30 on Friday night...and...well....that's sad.
So, anyway, this weekend has been busy and difficult at times-Brett will be gone for three days next week, out on the field ( I'm actually not even sure what this means, except that I suspect its like glorified camping and I dont get to see Brett....but who knows, my perception might be off a tad. ;-) And Brett had to spend most of yesterday working on his Arabic lessons that he needed to catch up on.
Yes, the army is taking a lot of getting use to...I mean, I guess I KNEW that it would be pretty all consuming, but I didnt really GRASP that fact fully until now.
SooOOooo...I decided to take the job at the coffee shop. I prayed about it, Brett prayed about it...and finally I just decided that the only negatives were very much on the "what if" side of things, and therefore if things DO end up not working out, I'll just quit. After all, its not like me quiting would hurt my career options. ;-)
So, I'm starting my training on Monday. I'm pretty excited about it. Hopefully, I wont be a TOTAL dork on my first day and drop too many things. ;-)
Last night, I made waffles for four boys. I even made HOMEMADE BLACKBERRY SYRUP.
It was fun to have people over, and I realized I get extreme satisfaction from feeding people. Its odd.
So, next week I've decided to make it a point to blog every day...I mean, sure, its not the same when you dont have constant internet access and therefore can blog when the mood strikes you, but I feel a great need to keep in contact with my blog readers. I've neglected you, but I will try my best to change my ways.
So, anyway, this weekend has been busy and difficult at times-Brett will be gone for three days next week, out on the field ( I'm actually not even sure what this means, except that I suspect its like glorified camping and I dont get to see Brett....but who knows, my perception might be off a tad. ;-) And Brett had to spend most of yesterday working on his Arabic lessons that he needed to catch up on.
Yes, the army is taking a lot of getting use to...I mean, I guess I KNEW that it would be pretty all consuming, but I didnt really GRASP that fact fully until now.
SooOOooo...I decided to take the job at the coffee shop. I prayed about it, Brett prayed about it...and finally I just decided that the only negatives were very much on the "what if" side of things, and therefore if things DO end up not working out, I'll just quit. After all, its not like me quiting would hurt my career options. ;-)
So, I'm starting my training on Monday. I'm pretty excited about it. Hopefully, I wont be a TOTAL dork on my first day and drop too many things. ;-)
Last night, I made waffles for four boys. I even made HOMEMADE BLACKBERRY SYRUP.
It was fun to have people over, and I realized I get extreme satisfaction from feeding people. Its odd.
So, next week I've decided to make it a point to blog every day...I mean, sure, its not the same when you dont have constant internet access and therefore can blog when the mood strikes you, but I feel a great need to keep in contact with my blog readers. I've neglected you, but I will try my best to change my ways.
August 08, 2007
the gift ( card).
My parents left early this morning. I was definitely sad to see them go! I really had so much fun hanging out with them, and I better not say any more about how much I will miss getting to do that on a weekly basis, or I will definitely cry.
But, it was good to show them around my "small sphere" of my life thus far...and I look forward to a "proper" visit in the future where we'll actually DO stuff! Instead I spent a goodly part of the past two days sorting out all the wedding presents that brought in my car! whew!
After the parents left, I went to Target and Pier1 to drown my homesick sorrows in some good old fashion shopping. And boy did I buy stuff! But, you know how much it ALL cost me?! $5.25
That's right. Gift Cards are my new favorite thing.
Anywho. I've saved the juiciest piece of news till now...
An hour or so ago I got a call from the coffee house owner offering me a job ( after a short painless interview over the phone where I waxed eloquent about myself).
I'm kinda in shock about it, to be honest. Like I said in my previous post, in a lot of ways I had not "started" my life in earnest here in Washington...but I felt that after my parents left, with nothing else to look forward to from my "comfortable old life", I might as well put my head down and get at it.
But so soon!?!
The only problem with the coffee house job ( it seems pretty sweet so far. did you know that minimum wage in Washington is $7.92?! hahaha. and i get free coffee. And learn how to MAKE good coffee.) is that I would probably have to work at least one shift during the weekend ( about four hours). Brett will not like this. Neither will I. So, continue to pray that I have wisdom about what to do. Ultimately, I have said that whatever job i get shouldnt get in the way of my time with Brett...
*sigh* decisions, decisions.
In other, less complicated news... I think I'm going to bake bread this week ( with the help of my totally awesome bread maker that i got from my Aunt Janis and Uncle Mike. Woo Woo!
I also hope to FINALLY get the last touches done to the apartment ( aka. put things on the walls) so I can take my "after" pictures and blow all of you blog readers out of the water with my before and after shots. Oh the magic I have worked on this place. ;-)
But, it was good to show them around my "small sphere" of my life thus far...and I look forward to a "proper" visit in the future where we'll actually DO stuff! Instead I spent a goodly part of the past two days sorting out all the wedding presents that brought in my car! whew!
After the parents left, I went to Target and Pier1 to drown my homesick sorrows in some good old fashion shopping. And boy did I buy stuff! But, you know how much it ALL cost me?! $5.25
That's right. Gift Cards are my new favorite thing.
Anywho. I've saved the juiciest piece of news till now...
An hour or so ago I got a call from the coffee house owner offering me a job ( after a short painless interview over the phone where I waxed eloquent about myself).
I'm kinda in shock about it, to be honest. Like I said in my previous post, in a lot of ways I had not "started" my life in earnest here in Washington...but I felt that after my parents left, with nothing else to look forward to from my "comfortable old life", I might as well put my head down and get at it.
But so soon!?!
The only problem with the coffee house job ( it seems pretty sweet so far. did you know that minimum wage in Washington is $7.92?! hahaha. and i get free coffee. And learn how to MAKE good coffee.) is that I would probably have to work at least one shift during the weekend ( about four hours). Brett will not like this. Neither will I. So, continue to pray that I have wisdom about what to do. Ultimately, I have said that whatever job i get shouldnt get in the way of my time with Brett...
*sigh* decisions, decisions.
In other, less complicated news... I think I'm going to bake bread this week ( with the help of my totally awesome bread maker that i got from my Aunt Janis and Uncle Mike. Woo Woo!
I also hope to FINALLY get the last touches done to the apartment ( aka. put things on the walls) so I can take my "after" pictures and blow all of you blog readers out of the water with my before and after shots. Oh the magic I have worked on this place. ;-)
August 06, 2007
no particular order.
Brett had Friday off ( which makes up a teensy bit for him working from 6 to 6 practically every day). So we were able to get me an Army ID card. I feel so powerful now. We also got me sorta/kinda signed up for health care....lots of red tape. But, I'm praying really hard right now that as my paper work goes through and I get assigned to a doctor that I get a really really good one!
We also bought dining room chairs this weekend, Brett finished the sixth Harry Potter book-so a good portion of the weekend I spent saying ( 1am) "Brett turn out the light...its late!" and reading out loud to him while he put the dining room chairs together.
We watched the Bourne Ultimatum, which I recommend because how can you NOT like Jason Bourne who is good at EVERYTHING and also doesnt like that he's a killer?! ;-)
I went blackberry picking with Katie at the park across from where we live ( I TOLD you it was a great park, but I had no idea the depths of its greatness!! we saw two baby bunnies while we walked to the blackberry patch!) and then I made a Blackberry buckle. From scratch.
*pause*
I dont want my amazing talents of going out and picking my own berries and then making something out of them to get lost in the rest of this post-so just take a moment to let that sink in....
Today I'm getting the guest room ready for my parents who should apparently be arriving from their long trek across the country to bring me my car late this afternoon!!! How exciting.
I did realize yesterday that I have been subconsciously putting off doing a lot of things until "after my parents leave" just because it seemed like thats really when things get all nitty gritty. So here's hoping that I dont flip out when I realize I've got two million thank you letter's to write and a whole life to start up once they leave. :-)
We also bought dining room chairs this weekend, Brett finished the sixth Harry Potter book-so a good portion of the weekend I spent saying ( 1am) "Brett turn out the light...its late!" and reading out loud to him while he put the dining room chairs together.
We watched the Bourne Ultimatum, which I recommend because how can you NOT like Jason Bourne who is good at EVERYTHING and also doesnt like that he's a killer?! ;-)
I went blackberry picking with Katie at the park across from where we live ( I TOLD you it was a great park, but I had no idea the depths of its greatness!! we saw two baby bunnies while we walked to the blackberry patch!) and then I made a Blackberry buckle. From scratch.
*pause*
I dont want my amazing talents of going out and picking my own berries and then making something out of them to get lost in the rest of this post-so just take a moment to let that sink in....
Today I'm getting the guest room ready for my parents who should apparently be arriving from their long trek across the country to bring me my car late this afternoon!!! How exciting.
I did realize yesterday that I have been subconsciously putting off doing a lot of things until "after my parents leave" just because it seemed like thats really when things get all nitty gritty. So here's hoping that I dont flip out when I realize I've got two million thank you letter's to write and a whole life to start up once they leave. :-)
August 02, 2007
ten minute drive, all the difference
So, last night my sweet husband took me to see "No Reservations". And I got to drive.
Those seem like simple things, a movie, driving...but they really made all the difference to my sanity.
Plus all your wonderful prayers and supportive comments and emails :-)
Yes, I'm feeling a lot better today, a lot less crazy.
So, I recommend No Reservations...of course, I recommend the original "Mostly Martha" (the german movie that came out several years ago.) almost more so....and you can probably rent it for cheaper ( if you're trying to save money by not going to the movies or something)...and its in german so there's that.
But, for me, going to the movies....getting out of the apartment. made me feel like a person.
Today, I talked to Billie and Steve on the phone ( at the same time! yay!). My mother. and Amy on the phone.
So, its been a good day for the talking. Thank goodness, I was forgetting how to have conversations.
Those seem like simple things, a movie, driving...but they really made all the difference to my sanity.
Plus all your wonderful prayers and supportive comments and emails :-)
Yes, I'm feeling a lot better today, a lot less crazy.
So, I recommend No Reservations...of course, I recommend the original "Mostly Martha" (the german movie that came out several years ago.) almost more so....and you can probably rent it for cheaper ( if you're trying to save money by not going to the movies or something)...and its in german so there's that.
But, for me, going to the movies....getting out of the apartment. made me feel like a person.
Today, I talked to Billie and Steve on the phone ( at the same time! yay!). My mother. and Amy on the phone.
So, its been a good day for the talking. Thank goodness, I was forgetting how to have conversations.
August 01, 2007
the hard part
So, its definitely starting to sink in that I dont have a life.
I think the worst part is that I have become incredibly boring.
I always felt that the one consolation, if I ever became really boring, is that I probably wouldnt know I was boring.
But, I definitely know it.
I realize that the fact that this morning I did the following:
Watched Arrested Development. Ate raspberry slice for breakfast. took off PJs, put on clothes, put on deodorant, brushed teeth, walked to mailbox...oh and the worst part is-that was from 8am till 11:30am....hours of boring behavior.
that's not even remotely interesting. I also realized that I had really reached the end of the line when I described to Brett the four articles I'd read in Vanity Fair as the most interesting thing that happened to me yesterday...
Yes, being stuck in this apartment for another week is definitely not good for my mental health. I've cried twice today. And I think the worst thing is that Brett mentioned maybe I should talk to...a girl. I feel bad for him. I can't be the most enjoyable person to be around at the moment. But, unfortunately, I dont KNOW any girls. And for some reason it seems like cheating to call up someone who's not here. I moved, didn't I? I CHOSE to not have my girlfriends around...
Incidently, I found some card stock at Albertsons ( I hate this store with a loathing passion now, because its the only place I can really walk to. every single freakin day.) so I was able to print up my resume. Maybe if I get a job I'll have something more interesting to talk about. Maybe if I get a job I'll feel like a productive member of society. Right now I feel so incredibly lame.
I think the thing I'm most tired of is me.
Even I am tired of the complaining that seems to be on a constant cycle inside my head...
Oh, hey, here's something interesting ( of course, it happened while I was on my honeymoon and during a time in my life when I was still a tiny bit of a nonbore..but whatever, I havent told the blog yet so we'll count it).
So, Brett and I were being delayed in the Bahamas airport, trying to get back to the United States and I was starting to feel odd ( which would turn into one of the most awful stomach viruses ever known to mankind) but I was ignoring it because there was nothing else to do but sit and watch Brett eat what looked like a disgusting piece of chicken in the airlounge...and as we sat I saw two incredibly skinny models sitting at a table next to us and it seemed that almost as soon as they registered on my "people I loathe" radar they hopped up and proclaimed that their flight was finally leaving. Now, it sounded like they were on our flight so I excused myself from the table to go look and see if there were any updates on our flight.
I made it to the ticket counter ( was reeeeally starting to not feel well at this point) and since there was no change in the flight information that was flashing above the counter I turned around to walk back to where Brett was...I turned around to run almost smack dab into some dude wearing a baseball cap at an odd angle who was being accosted by some women who was saying "are you an actor!?!"
And oh, yes it was...I had just so happened to have seen the movie Step Up, where Tatum Channing played the male lead much to my chagrin, and there he was in the flesh...
However, I didnt much care. Since I wasnt feeling particularly good. And besides, that movie was awful.
...
About two minutes later when Brett and I were having to run for our lives to get to our plane ( since, yes, it WAS our plane boarding, and they just hadnt changed the board) I pushed between Tatum and his female admirer without even an "excuse me"...I think that may make Tatum and I even for me spending $7.50 on his lame movie.
I think the worst part is that I have become incredibly boring.
I always felt that the one consolation, if I ever became really boring, is that I probably wouldnt know I was boring.
But, I definitely know it.
I realize that the fact that this morning I did the following:
Watched Arrested Development. Ate raspberry slice for breakfast. took off PJs, put on clothes, put on deodorant, brushed teeth, walked to mailbox...oh and the worst part is-that was from 8am till 11:30am....hours of boring behavior.
that's not even remotely interesting. I also realized that I had really reached the end of the line when I described to Brett the four articles I'd read in Vanity Fair as the most interesting thing that happened to me yesterday...
Yes, being stuck in this apartment for another week is definitely not good for my mental health. I've cried twice today. And I think the worst thing is that Brett mentioned maybe I should talk to...a girl. I feel bad for him. I can't be the most enjoyable person to be around at the moment. But, unfortunately, I dont KNOW any girls. And for some reason it seems like cheating to call up someone who's not here. I moved, didn't I? I CHOSE to not have my girlfriends around...
Incidently, I found some card stock at Albertsons ( I hate this store with a loathing passion now, because its the only place I can really walk to. every single freakin day.) so I was able to print up my resume. Maybe if I get a job I'll have something more interesting to talk about. Maybe if I get a job I'll feel like a productive member of society. Right now I feel so incredibly lame.
I think the thing I'm most tired of is me.
Even I am tired of the complaining that seems to be on a constant cycle inside my head...
Oh, hey, here's something interesting ( of course, it happened while I was on my honeymoon and during a time in my life when I was still a tiny bit of a nonbore..but whatever, I havent told the blog yet so we'll count it).
So, Brett and I were being delayed in the Bahamas airport, trying to get back to the United States and I was starting to feel odd ( which would turn into one of the most awful stomach viruses ever known to mankind) but I was ignoring it because there was nothing else to do but sit and watch Brett eat what looked like a disgusting piece of chicken in the airlounge...and as we sat I saw two incredibly skinny models sitting at a table next to us and it seemed that almost as soon as they registered on my "people I loathe" radar they hopped up and proclaimed that their flight was finally leaving. Now, it sounded like they were on our flight so I excused myself from the table to go look and see if there were any updates on our flight.
I made it to the ticket counter ( was reeeeally starting to not feel well at this point) and since there was no change in the flight information that was flashing above the counter I turned around to walk back to where Brett was...I turned around to run almost smack dab into some dude wearing a baseball cap at an odd angle who was being accosted by some women who was saying "are you an actor!?!"
And oh, yes it was...I had just so happened to have seen the movie Step Up, where Tatum Channing played the male lead much to my chagrin, and there he was in the flesh...
However, I didnt much care. Since I wasnt feeling particularly good. And besides, that movie was awful.
...
About two minutes later when Brett and I were having to run for our lives to get to our plane ( since, yes, it WAS our plane boarding, and they just hadnt changed the board) I pushed between Tatum and his female admirer without even an "excuse me"...I think that may make Tatum and I even for me spending $7.50 on his lame movie.
July 31, 2007
the difference.
Yesterday I sat on the floor of the living room for an hour becoming more and more frustrated with the stupid people at IKEA for telling me that I didnt need a drill to put together these evil bookshelves that Brett and I bought on Sunday, since it was obvious that I was going to need one, since the screws were not fitting the hole that the instructions indicated.... Five hours later when Brett came home from work it was with utter shame that the bookshelves were still in pieces on the floor. Luckily, I was ready with my excuse that we'd definitely need a drill to put those babies together....
Five minutes later Brett had a good three fourths of the shelves completed.
*sigh*
Anyway I'm back in the coffee house. For some reason I havent applied for the job yet. Mostly because every time I'm in here there are girls who look about 12 working behind the counter-and there is no way I'd want to ask them for a job. However, today there seem to be some more mature folks behind the counter so we'll see..
It's so odd having to start all over again on all those important aspects of life....church, friends, job. I'm currently fighting the urge to just rush into things just because I want things to be settled. Instead, I'm trying to revel in the fact that God definitely has a plan for me here.
Yesterday I went for a walk with Katie ( she's married to one of Brett's best friends here in Washington, and they live two apartments down from us.) in the park near the apartment...it was FABULOUS! I had no idea how huge this park was, or that it had a lake and what seemed like an infinent number of biking paths going off in various directions....oh! AND it has a dog park, where you can go and look at all the dogs running around....from the safe distance behind the fence. hehe. So, yes, I'm pleased that I have a quiet "rural" spot I can literally run to here....you can also see the Mountain on clear days, which I still havent gotten tired at staring at. Mount Rainier is just so impressive!
So, there are some positive aspects of Washington living. Besides the obvious one that I get to see Brett every single day I still can't get over my good luck! hehehe.
Five minutes later Brett had a good three fourths of the shelves completed.
*sigh*
Anyway I'm back in the coffee house. For some reason I havent applied for the job yet. Mostly because every time I'm in here there are girls who look about 12 working behind the counter-and there is no way I'd want to ask them for a job. However, today there seem to be some more mature folks behind the counter so we'll see..
It's so odd having to start all over again on all those important aspects of life....church, friends, job. I'm currently fighting the urge to just rush into things just because I want things to be settled. Instead, I'm trying to revel in the fact that God definitely has a plan for me here.
Yesterday I went for a walk with Katie ( she's married to one of Brett's best friends here in Washington, and they live two apartments down from us.) in the park near the apartment...it was FABULOUS! I had no idea how huge this park was, or that it had a lake and what seemed like an infinent number of biking paths going off in various directions....oh! AND it has a dog park, where you can go and look at all the dogs running around....from the safe distance behind the fence. hehe. So, yes, I'm pleased that I have a quiet "rural" spot I can literally run to here....you can also see the Mountain on clear days, which I still havent gotten tired at staring at. Mount Rainier is just so impressive!
So, there are some positive aspects of Washington living. Besides the obvious one that I get to see Brett every single day I still can't get over my good luck! hehehe.
July 27, 2007
Friday? Really, its not monday?
So, today Brett and I had the grand plan of me going onto base with him before work ( at 6am thank you very much) so that we could go by and get me all "official" according the army. You know, with an ID and benefits and all that jazz....but it was once again not to be. ( we had tried on Monday but they wouldnt accept a copy of the marriage license -it had to be the real deal)...Brett's truck pretty much died on Hwy 5.
Luckily friends were in the area and a van was borrowed for the day...but I still havent heard what the results of the poor trucks visit to the machanic was, and it looks like we may be looking for a new vehicle. Of course, I don't know what we'll do in the mean time...
Things never seem to happen according to plan. Honestly, what's going to happen next?
Oh, incidently, I nearly burned down the apartment last night when I plastic lid slid down into the dishwasher and happily melted at the bottom. And I woke up this morning to a little stream of ants in the kitchen....honestly, I don't think I'm cracked up to be a house wife. So I better get a job for reals.
Luckily friends were in the area and a van was borrowed for the day...but I still havent heard what the results of the poor trucks visit to the machanic was, and it looks like we may be looking for a new vehicle. Of course, I don't know what we'll do in the mean time...
Things never seem to happen according to plan. Honestly, what's going to happen next?
Oh, incidently, I nearly burned down the apartment last night when I plastic lid slid down into the dishwasher and happily melted at the bottom. And I woke up this morning to a little stream of ants in the kitchen....honestly, I don't think I'm cracked up to be a house wife. So I better get a job for reals.
July 26, 2007
blog/friend
Oh man, I feel like I'm sitting down to talk to a dear friend who I havent seen in FOREVER! I dont even know where to begin!!! I hate this not being able to blog at any given moment thing, especially since its not like I have many people to talk to these days...
But, I'm sitting in this adorable little coffee shop that's within walking distance of our apartment using their free wifi and drinking ginger tea ( for my stomache) so lets get started on a REAL catch up...
First of all, its already Thursday and the apartment is still an absolute wreck. Considering "unpacking and cleaning" are my only two jobs at the moment you would THINK I would have accomplished more. Today the mess and the disorganization and the ugginess of the apartment finally took its toll and I had to run away...I suppose my biggest excuse for having not accomplished more is that I have been fighting whatever stomache bug I contracted in the Bahamas...but after a full 48 hours of only ginger ale and campbell's chicken and stars soup I am feeling semi-me again. I think this'll be a relief to all the people around me too. As in Brett. He's the only person I've seen in the past four days. Bless his heart.
For those of you that are detail types: Brett's day starts at 4:30 ( and I've been a SUPER GROWN-UP girl and gotten up with him two of the three days he's been back at work! WOOO! And the one day I didnt get up it was because I had spent the night alternating between throwing up and lying on the bathroom floor crying...so yeah, I feel like that's a good excuse.) and then Brett leaves for work around 6am...and doesnt usually get home until around six pm. Today, however, he was able to come home for lunch for about an hour which was a nice surprise. But, most days its just me. I guess this will inevitably not last ( this solitude) so I shouldnt complain. Its really not that bad-and considering I've spent the last month with an average of a four person entourge around me at pretty much all times I guess I'm due some aloneness....
Tonight, is my first official night of going to Brett's weekly bible study. I dont know too much about it, except that it seems rather intense ( as does everything associated with the Navigators from my own limited experience) but I'll let you know how it goes. I'm frankly just excited to see people and you know, have conversations. That'll be something new. ;-)
I'm already feeling a lot more energetic just typing this, blogging is so theraputic. I dont know why anyone would ever stop.
Honestly.
So, there is a little sign on the door of the coffee house that says "Now Hiring". My heart kindof jumped a beat in my chest when I saw it. Should I apply?! What do you guys think?
I'll pray about that...
But, I'm sitting in this adorable little coffee shop that's within walking distance of our apartment using their free wifi and drinking ginger tea ( for my stomache) so lets get started on a REAL catch up...
First of all, its already Thursday and the apartment is still an absolute wreck. Considering "unpacking and cleaning" are my only two jobs at the moment you would THINK I would have accomplished more. Today the mess and the disorganization and the ugginess of the apartment finally took its toll and I had to run away...I suppose my biggest excuse for having not accomplished more is that I have been fighting whatever stomache bug I contracted in the Bahamas...but after a full 48 hours of only ginger ale and campbell's chicken and stars soup I am feeling semi-me again. I think this'll be a relief to all the people around me too. As in Brett. He's the only person I've seen in the past four days. Bless his heart.
For those of you that are detail types: Brett's day starts at 4:30 ( and I've been a SUPER GROWN-UP girl and gotten up with him two of the three days he's been back at work! WOOO! And the one day I didnt get up it was because I had spent the night alternating between throwing up and lying on the bathroom floor crying...so yeah, I feel like that's a good excuse.) and then Brett leaves for work around 6am...and doesnt usually get home until around six pm. Today, however, he was able to come home for lunch for about an hour which was a nice surprise. But, most days its just me. I guess this will inevitably not last ( this solitude) so I shouldnt complain. Its really not that bad-and considering I've spent the last month with an average of a four person entourge around me at pretty much all times I guess I'm due some aloneness....
Tonight, is my first official night of going to Brett's weekly bible study. I dont know too much about it, except that it seems rather intense ( as does everything associated with the Navigators from my own limited experience) but I'll let you know how it goes. I'm frankly just excited to see people and you know, have conversations. That'll be something new. ;-)
I'm already feeling a lot more energetic just typing this, blogging is so theraputic. I dont know why anyone would ever stop.
Honestly.
So, there is a little sign on the door of the coffee house that says "Now Hiring". My heart kindof jumped a beat in my chest when I saw it. Should I apply?! What do you guys think?
I'll pray about that...
July 23, 2007
reality=
I threw up in the Seattle airport. Which, to be honest, was kind of a relief since I'd felt perpetually sick all day and had fought the idea of throwing up in one of those ridiculously small barf bags pretty much all day. At least I made it all the way to a toliet. Ugg. I'm still feeling rather ill. Some sort of island sickness I'm sure.
In other news, Brett and I are off to try and get me a cell phone. And then I'm home to write down all the many things that were water damaged in my moving truck ( turns out my little move up to Washington DID NOT go without a hitch.)...so far the things I'm really sick about are some priceless books ( in my opinion because they are out of print) and my scripture plaque that my church gave my for my high school graduation...other than that-things like my bed and my bookcases...they can be replaced. right?
So, I officially live in rainy and cold Washington now. I thought they said that summers were nice?! hehehe.
In other news, Brett and I are off to try and get me a cell phone. And then I'm home to write down all the many things that were water damaged in my moving truck ( turns out my little move up to Washington DID NOT go without a hitch.)...so far the things I'm really sick about are some priceless books ( in my opinion because they are out of print) and my scripture plaque that my church gave my for my high school graduation...other than that-things like my bed and my bookcases...they can be replaced. right?
So, I officially live in rainy and cold Washington now. I thought they said that summers were nice?! hehehe.
July 18, 2007
Introducing Lt. and Mr. and Mrs. Wilson
So yes, Brett and I are happily living it up in the Bahamas. We've been married for three days and counting and we're pretty much the best at being married. hahaha. Of course, who wouldnt be really fabulous at anything when you're in a beautiful place like this??
More on...everything....later.
More on...everything....later.
July 10, 2007
woke up this morning...
to find my parents house empty. This was odd on many fronts. Afterall, now that Carmi is officially in town, I have four fabulous girls plus parents plus me here in the house....so the fact that it was just me when I woke up....crazy..
But, I suppose I'll take this opportunity to clue in my blog, bless its heart. I've neglected it. ;-) Four day until the wedding. I'm very excited about marrying Brett. Really, I've probably never looked forward to something so much, and now that its literally upon us, I'm even MORE excited and delighted.
Yesterday I spent the day with Brett's family. I finally got to meet Brett's oldest brother Tim and his wife Amber and their adorable son Levi. Adorable honestly doesnt even cut it. He was just that cute. But, along with that meeting I also got to meet Brett's cousin Trevor and his wife Rhonda and their three boys ( also a bundle of absolute fun) as well as catch up with Brett's Aunt Johnetta and Uncle Cleo and have more time with Brett's mom and step dad and Josh ( middle brother :-) )......and I think Brett was there too. But, I felt like I didnt get to see him all day! But, I suppose since I got to talk about him to so many people that love him almost as much as I do...it was still a great day. In fact, I'd have to say it all went waaaay better than my dreams the night before predicted. hehehe. Nothing like anxiety dreams about meeting your new extended family. :-P
...
I don't even know what to say! There is so much going on in my head right now!!
I'm not even going to try. Maybe one day soon I will be able to express the bitter and much sweetness of this time. It has truly been a gift from God. And I have a feeling the next few days will only be building upon blessings.
~
But, I suppose I'll take this opportunity to clue in my blog, bless its heart. I've neglected it. ;-) Four day until the wedding. I'm very excited about marrying Brett. Really, I've probably never looked forward to something so much, and now that its literally upon us, I'm even MORE excited and delighted.
Yesterday I spent the day with Brett's family. I finally got to meet Brett's oldest brother Tim and his wife Amber and their adorable son Levi. Adorable honestly doesnt even cut it. He was just that cute. But, along with that meeting I also got to meet Brett's cousin Trevor and his wife Rhonda and their three boys ( also a bundle of absolute fun) as well as catch up with Brett's Aunt Johnetta and Uncle Cleo and have more time with Brett's mom and step dad and Josh ( middle brother :-) )......and I think Brett was there too. But, I felt like I didnt get to see him all day! But, I suppose since I got to talk about him to so many people that love him almost as much as I do...it was still a great day. In fact, I'd have to say it all went waaaay better than my dreams the night before predicted. hehehe. Nothing like anxiety dreams about meeting your new extended family. :-P
...
I don't even know what to say! There is so much going on in my head right now!!
I'm not even going to try. Maybe one day soon I will be able to express the bitter and much sweetness of this time. It has truly been a gift from God. And I have a feeling the next few days will only be building upon blessings.
~
July 07, 2007
July 06, 2007
time alone..
Remember when I use to live by myself...and life was all normal and nothing really ever happened? Was that really last month?
I just woke up at eight a.m.-after staying up way past my bedtime. Just because being totally by myself and checking my emails and reading blogs sounded better than sleep.
Who knew that anything would ever trump sleep?!
Almost one week until the wedding! While life is going faster than it ever has before, and I feel like I never have a full conversation, or spend enough time with the people I love the most, and that somehow I'm going to miss something in the next week that I really need to do, or should do.... I couldnt be happier that I get to marry Brett in 8 days...he's pretty much the best thing since, well, anything.
I just woke up at eight a.m.-after staying up way past my bedtime. Just because being totally by myself and checking my emails and reading blogs sounded better than sleep.
Who knew that anything would ever trump sleep?!
Almost one week until the wedding! While life is going faster than it ever has before, and I feel like I never have a full conversation, or spend enough time with the people I love the most, and that somehow I'm going to miss something in the next week that I really need to do, or should do.... I couldnt be happier that I get to marry Brett in 8 days...he's pretty much the best thing since, well, anything.
July 03, 2007
in the dark.
Everyone is asleep. Well, except for Lydia....she just followed me down the stairs a minute ago, I guess we got bitten by the same insomia bug. But, now she's headed back to bed, and here I am with you...
Hopefully, blogging will calm me down enough to sleep, like I said before...it seems that just about every year I must face my "life changes insomia"...but I suppose that's a small price to pay to have ones life turned upside down and backwards and forwards all for the sake of what you know is Right. And what is Good. And what will ultimately be super exciting.
Exciting, once you get over the giant hurtles of actually getting there.
Tonight I spent a great deal of time on the phone....but the best two conversations were with Tabitha and Brett. Both, arriving tomorrow! YAY! Two hours apart, hopefully I can sneak in one our two thank you notes ( writing them) between the two arrivals-but I highly doubt it. *sigh*
So, yes, back to the excitment and the reason why I cant sleep....Tabitha is currently in LA. She has arrived safely on American soil and already she is a fabulous traveler!!! One day when she's a missionary in some far off land, I will be able to say that my wedding got the first stamp in her passport!!
Brett, is currently finishing up last minute tasks ( speaking of tasks, I'd appreciate prayer-my things have not yet arrived at Brett's apartment, which makes me nervous. It also means that when it DOES arrive-Brett's fabulous friends are going to have to do the unloading!! So, yes, I'm a tad on the upheaval side....), doing all sorts of things before he has to get up at 3am ( ish) to fly to Texas...the last time he will fly here without being my husband.
I cannot tell you how very hard it is for my brain to comprehend the fact that I will not have to say goodbye to him again...that I actually get to keep him!! Really, its just shocking to my little system, a little system that is so use to the way things have been, the annoyance of having to say goodbye, the dreadfulness of only have the telephone, sometimes not even that, to keep in touch....its just....well, hard to believe the waiting is almost up!
But, if there was ever something I'd like to spend quality time wrapping my head around, well...this would be the thing!
Life in general is hard to get my head around, currently. But, I feel very upheld, because, honestly how else would I keep myself from crying every time I see my parents? ( it's always hard to say goodbye, but much harder when you have wonderful parents like I do.)
What keeps me from flipping out at all the little tiny tasks ( that have the annoying habit of building up into one giant task!) . Or the overwhelmingly amazing gift of having SO many fabulous visitors all at once-each one being someone I'd like to give my undivided attention to for 24 hours straight...and yet, its just not possible!
But, I feel upheld, because I come to the end of each day and it seems so clear to me that only God could have made the day tick by in such a fashion. To get me all the way to the end.
I'm excited about the future. But kind of how you are excited about a holiday you've never been on. You've read some previous testimonies from other people that have been, you look at some pictures that other people have taken, you've asked questions of all those who have gone before you, you've read the travel books.... And for all you can tell, its going to be the best trip ever. And yet, you still, after all that, can't actually picture yourself in the holiday. You're still super excited though. I mean, who would'nt be?!
I think its all they trying to picture myself in the holiday that keeps me up at night. I mean, heck, all that excitment. It would keep anyone up!!
So, yes, I keep thinking about that verse that says, "For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark..."
I don't know why it keeps coming back to me. I guess its just that I never knew how ALL CONSUMING my wedding would be in so many ways...and that ultimately, like never before have I desired so much to have my mind on eternal things. My days are full, but are they full with eternal things?! So, even as I continue this two week long party, as I spend my days with family, with friends, with the Love of my life....I would only desire have my heart with Him who made such a life even possible. That I am forgiven, that I am loved, that I am the Beloved daughter of the most High, those are glorious truths that are only possible through Jesus Christ. Yes, I am getting ready to be married to the man I love, and my prayers are for the Most High God to come back tomorrow if that would bring Him glory. ( of course, if not-I'd have Him hold off until at least August. )
Well, I think just maybe this baring of my soul has done the trick and I just might be able to go to sleep now....
Hopefully, blogging will calm me down enough to sleep, like I said before...it seems that just about every year I must face my "life changes insomia"...but I suppose that's a small price to pay to have ones life turned upside down and backwards and forwards all for the sake of what you know is Right. And what is Good. And what will ultimately be super exciting.
Exciting, once you get over the giant hurtles of actually getting there.
Tonight I spent a great deal of time on the phone....but the best two conversations were with Tabitha and Brett. Both, arriving tomorrow! YAY! Two hours apart, hopefully I can sneak in one our two thank you notes ( writing them) between the two arrivals-but I highly doubt it. *sigh*
So, yes, back to the excitment and the reason why I cant sleep....Tabitha is currently in LA. She has arrived safely on American soil and already she is a fabulous traveler!!! One day when she's a missionary in some far off land, I will be able to say that my wedding got the first stamp in her passport!!
Brett, is currently finishing up last minute tasks ( speaking of tasks, I'd appreciate prayer-my things have not yet arrived at Brett's apartment, which makes me nervous. It also means that when it DOES arrive-Brett's fabulous friends are going to have to do the unloading!! So, yes, I'm a tad on the upheaval side....), doing all sorts of things before he has to get up at 3am ( ish) to fly to Texas...the last time he will fly here without being my husband.
I cannot tell you how very hard it is for my brain to comprehend the fact that I will not have to say goodbye to him again...that I actually get to keep him!! Really, its just shocking to my little system, a little system that is so use to the way things have been, the annoyance of having to say goodbye, the dreadfulness of only have the telephone, sometimes not even that, to keep in touch....its just....well, hard to believe the waiting is almost up!
But, if there was ever something I'd like to spend quality time wrapping my head around, well...this would be the thing!
Life in general is hard to get my head around, currently. But, I feel very upheld, because, honestly how else would I keep myself from crying every time I see my parents? ( it's always hard to say goodbye, but much harder when you have wonderful parents like I do.)
What keeps me from flipping out at all the little tiny tasks ( that have the annoying habit of building up into one giant task!) . Or the overwhelmingly amazing gift of having SO many fabulous visitors all at once-each one being someone I'd like to give my undivided attention to for 24 hours straight...and yet, its just not possible!
But, I feel upheld, because I come to the end of each day and it seems so clear to me that only God could have made the day tick by in such a fashion. To get me all the way to the end.
I'm excited about the future. But kind of how you are excited about a holiday you've never been on. You've read some previous testimonies from other people that have been, you look at some pictures that other people have taken, you've asked questions of all those who have gone before you, you've read the travel books.... And for all you can tell, its going to be the best trip ever. And yet, you still, after all that, can't actually picture yourself in the holiday. You're still super excited though. I mean, who would'nt be?!
I think its all they trying to picture myself in the holiday that keeps me up at night. I mean, heck, all that excitment. It would keep anyone up!!
So, yes, I keep thinking about that verse that says, "For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark..."
I don't know why it keeps coming back to me. I guess its just that I never knew how ALL CONSUMING my wedding would be in so many ways...and that ultimately, like never before have I desired so much to have my mind on eternal things. My days are full, but are they full with eternal things?! So, even as I continue this two week long party, as I spend my days with family, with friends, with the Love of my life....I would only desire have my heart with Him who made such a life even possible. That I am forgiven, that I am loved, that I am the Beloved daughter of the most High, those are glorious truths that are only possible through Jesus Christ. Yes, I am getting ready to be married to the man I love, and my prayers are for the Most High God to come back tomorrow if that would bring Him glory. ( of course, if not-I'd have Him hold off until at least August. )
Well, I think just maybe this baring of my soul has done the trick and I just might be able to go to sleep now....
July 01, 2007
one day...
things will slow down and I'll have time to really and truly give you a blog post you can be proud of, but, until then just know that as of yesterday it is TWO WEEKS until the wedding, I have TWO international visitors living with me right now, and TWO more wonderful people coming in on Tuesday...oh, and I still have a lot of things left to do.
Went to Jordan and Heather Yerkes wedding yesterday. It was really great. But, of any wedding I've ever been to, it was the first one where I was thinking about my own wedding waaaaay more than I was about theirs ( sorry guys!). However, it was kinda nice having it so close to when mine is because I got to talk to a lot of people that I KNOW I wont get to spend as much time talking with at my OWN. So that was nice :-)
Em and Lyds are watching a movie with my parents downstairs. I've been talking to Brett on the phone. I suppose I should go down and join them now.
Went to Jordan and Heather Yerkes wedding yesterday. It was really great. But, of any wedding I've ever been to, it was the first one where I was thinking about my own wedding waaaaay more than I was about theirs ( sorry guys!). However, it was kinda nice having it so close to when mine is because I got to talk to a lot of people that I KNOW I wont get to spend as much time talking with at my OWN. So that was nice :-)
Em and Lyds are watching a movie with my parents downstairs. I've been talking to Brett on the phone. I suppose I should go down and join them now.
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