"I'm your huckleberry"

I’m a romantic. Or at least that’s what I’ve decided to call it, whatever the case, I believe in signs. Not that I find pictures of the Virgin Mary in my toast or anything-but there have been more than one occasion where I’ve felt like God’s down right spoken to me through seemingly nothing occurrences. Its those moments where you KNOW God hears all and knows all-and it gives you a warm fuzzy feeling just thinking about it.

Anyway, I’ve thought a little bit about the best way to tell this story-reminds me of this weekend, talking to Carmi and her explaining that she had moved the fact of me living in Texas at the time of my wedding to the END of a story to give dramatic affect.
Wrong way: “So my best friend in Texas wanted me to be in her wedding and I really wanted to be in it.”

Right way: “So my best friend invited me to be in her wedding and I really wanted to be in it…. My best friend lives in Texas.” ( just hear the people gasping)

See? Much better. Throw the surprise in at the end. Dramatic.
However, when you’re telling a story about how God heard your deepest silly little desires and gave them to you as small sign of His love and affection-the problem is, a lot of the time people don’t KNOW about your silly little desires.

So, here I go…ruining the dramatic affect of this story:

It was pretty early on in our marriage that Brett and I were talking about movies that we liked and we were reminded of the Western Delight that IS Tombstone. Val Kilmer shined as Doc Holiday, there have been very few really good walking shots ( besides that fire shot in Desperado) that can rival those do-gooder cowboys walking down the streets of Tombstone on the way to the be showdown with the local badguy…there is even a random house fire in the back ground…go figure, and there just is NO comparison to some of the lines ( who is that tall glass of water over there…eyes squinted against the sun?…. “Why Johnny, I forgot you were theeeey-rr. You may go.” “I’m your huckleberry” etc. etc. )…and so it was decided that we must watch this classic of classics as soon as possible.
Easy, right? It’s a classic. Every video store would have it.
Wrong. There was not a video rental in a 15 mile radius that had a copy of Tombstone…and as for buying it. Pretty much impossible. It wasn’t for lack of looking either, Oh, we looked…Wal-Mart, Best Buy, Target…random little DVD stores….nobody had a copy of Tombstone. It was a veritable desert out there.

Anyway, like I told you, on Thursday Brett and I made the seemingly rash decision to kick this popsicle stand and go to Portland for the weekend. Now, its not like there was that much “looking forward to” time-but in the long hours that were Friday it became more and more clear that it was possibly the best decision we had EVER. MADE. Turns out…until the Middle of December Brett and I do not have ONE DAY that is not planned. We do not have ONE DAY that is completely free to spend together doing whatever we want. Honestly, that thought alone would send anyone to Oregon….but the good reasons for our trip just seemed to pile up and by the time we’d headed out the door it was a no-brainer, this weekend away was a winner. However, it wasn’t the good reasons or the fact that Saturday was really gorgeous ( no rain, hardly any coldness) or the knowledge that we’d even get a whole extra hour of sleep on Saturday night, or how we came upon this gas station that sold old school candy on the drive to Portland ( side note: all good road trips need snacks. It’s a rule) or how once we got to Portland we somehow made it to Powell’s Bookstore ( the largest book store known to man) even though Google maps failed us by giving us a closed road as part of our directions, or how once we got to Powell’s they had three floors of book happiness for us to wander through….or how blessed we felt that we hardly blinked at paying for all those books we ended up NEEDING, and it wasn’t how we randomly found this little tiny Espresso, Chocolate Bar that fed us glorious dessert and it wasn’t even how we were “forced” to go to Whole Foods to validate our parking stub and therefore forced to buy wine and really cool wine glasses….no, it was none of these things that really told me that God was looking down from heaven and smiling at me and saying “I’m going to take care of things-and not only that…I’m going to make things work out for good… nope. It was the fact that once we’d had our near perfect day in Portland and we were settled into our lovely hotel and flipping through the channels on the television that we came to the credits of Men in Black followed with a voice over saying, “Up next Tombstone.”
Yes, it was that moment that really sent the message home. Even though tomorrow is going to probably be a long day-and the next day will probably be even longer, things are going to work out OK, because we got to watch Tombstone.

Get outa dodge.

So, Brett and I sat down on the couch at 9:30 last night to compare notes on our week....
It didnt take long for me to make the annoucment:

"Let's forget everything and get out of town!!"


So, that's exactly what we're doing tomorrow. We're headed to Portland OR to do something Brett and I looooove to do....we're visiting the largest bookstore in the WORLD. ( Powell's Booksellers: takes up over a block of city...)...staying in a nice hotel and forgetting about everything for a whole two days.

I think its going to turn out. Wish us luck.

tired.

Yup, i think that pretty much discribes the Wilsons of late. Poor Brett's working hours have officially gotten out of control-most nights have been between 7pm and 8:30 before he's even home!! This really affects my days. I still havent figured out how to be happy and content with this set-up.

Last night we hosted the "Forty Days of Community" small group at our house ( incidently, Carmi made fun of the term "bible study" in her blog today...and yet, I gotta tell you, I use it all the time...I think the main problem with going away from this term is that we actually FORGET to study the bible! Which, is not a good thing. Case in point: Forty Days of Community Small group. i.e. Rick Warren trying to convince you to "serve others" without very much Bible at all. *sigh*
But, dont take my word for it, I was having a difficult time last night for sure....its HARD to be social and involved ( plus God-focused) when your husband comes in half way through completely tired and in serious need of food and you have no way of giving him rest or refreshment because of the 10 people in your living room-it was one of the few times I've really NOT wanted to be entertaining....

But, I did dress up as a Feist's back up dancer from her 1234 music video. ....I was all in red...pictures to come when I have time.

rockstar.

I'm bored.
This has become a common occurance in the last week or so ( and shall continue to be so, probably). I get home from work at 4:30 and then from then until 6:30-till anytime towards 8 I wait around for Brett to get home.
I should PROBABLY find something really productive to do, but so far the only thing I do is cook dinner. Since my cooking dinner skills are not martha stewart by any means this doesnt take that long, bringing us back to bored. And since tonight I'm making waffles and bacon and eggs ( something you dont really pre-prepare for) I'm really bored.

Today I looked at all the pictures that I have been tagged in on Facebook...they span a good five to eight years of my life which is kinda weird to see all mixed together like that but here's a good one that wasnt taken very long ago...don't ask what I'm doing...who knows.-but that's definitely not productive.
So I made a comprehensive grocery list for Thanksgiving. I know its early-but I'm so excited about it, plus come next week Louise will be visiting (YAAAAAAAY!) and I definitely will not have time to make such lists....and then, low and behold it'll be the time to go shopping for thanksgiving and therefore now the list is done ( or almost...I am still missing a recipe from my mom.)

Anywho, my throat hurts. This is upsetting on several levels, one, I dont like sore throats-they hurt. Two, I have yet to have a week go by without SOME sort of ailment. *sigh*

This week is Halloween or the holiday which *I* dress up for-Reformation Day....on the way to Bible Study last night I constructed the easiest possible costumes for Brett and I....we will be....Luke and Loreli from the Gilmore Girls. This will either be funny or will fail drastically. I'll let you know.

And speaking of said Bible Study, apparently I am suppose to memorize TWELVE scriptures this week. Honestly. I've never been big on memorizing bible verses ( I am pretty good at paraphrasing them-and I had always felt that was good enough...) and NOW I'm suppose become a superstar at it in, like, five days. Christian growth, here I come.

oooo...I just got a text message from Brett saying he was going to be at work a "while longer"....its already 6:30.

Army Wife Tip of the Week: Do not calculate up how much your husband gets paid by the hour, you will only realize he is slave labor and that will only make you mad(er)...so just DONT DO IT...even if you ARE bored.

frustrating.

Pretty much nothing I wanted to do today happened.
I wanted to get the military stickers for the Prius ( FINALLY!)...and when through an two hour rigamaroll ( is that how you spell that? Is it even one word?!) that included a fire drill ( dont ask) to finally be told that because the car was in Brett's name I could not get the stupid stickers. BOO!!! I just need to go ahead with the inevitible and get power of attorney...of course who knows how long that'll take me to get done! :-( meh.

I wanted to talk to my sister. But i suppose busy lives on BOTH ends make this nearly impossible. I am currently using self control to not leave her more voice mails. ( after all I can leave a very long-winded voice mail when pressed).

However, while I didnt get the things on my short list accomplished I am making Kielbass soup-yay! Thanks to Stacy for the recipe...and I did visit Wes at his work at the evil empire of Starbucks where I got a FREE drink ( because I won a bet. yessssss. I am "vindicated" ) and I am making cookies....and Brett will be home from work...soon...hopefully....and then the weekend can finally start.
Boy, its been a long time coming. This week has been hard

How many words can one person make in italics?!

not fading into the clear blue yonder...just yet.

Some days I get scared that I have lost my creative side. As much as I love my job, it only uses my “relating to others” skills and my “coffee making” skills ( which are so newly acquired they’re hardly worth mentioning.)…so what if I’m becoming some sort of dimwit who is only capable writing in her journal to God, grocery lists and her name on debit card recites?
I honestly don’t know what I’ll do.
Yet, it seems to be happening. For one thing-I have a lot less time to blog…you see, I realized recently that while its possible for me to blog at work, this job is very different from my last two. Having a constant flow of customers, each different in personality, age, style, history-my mind is having to be a constant activity in composing communications with these people. Leaving little time to compose sentences for a blog post not yet written.
Its so sad! It is like a season is over, a season that was truly wonderful. A season I want back. You see, I didn’t just blog once ( often twice) a day…no… I blogged all the time-you only read a small fraction of what I was actually narrating. Yes, the truth has finally come out: I use to talk to myself and THAT was blogging.

So, now that I’ve identified that lack, I am just going to have to change my strategy. This is part of growing up: I must now be disciplined. Make myself compose sentences in my head-find things that aren’t off limits for me to blog about….I must TAKE the time to write this dear little blog. Because, I will not be like everyone else who has neglected their blog, slowly dwindling away until the writer and its readers alike forget it ever existed. No, if this blog ever ends-It’ll have a strong ending…an ending on the scale of Henry V’s St. Crispin’s Day speech. So there.

Ok, so now that we’ve gotten that life crisis out of the way…

Last night, Brett and I watched Evan Almighty. What a delightful little movie! I totally laughed and it had some rather nice ways of looking at the relationship of God and man-nothing I’d look at under in theological microscope-but not bad nonetheless. Steve Carell is fast becoming my new favorite comedian.
I also made Peanut Sauce and Stirfry chicken.

I realized this morning that I actually had two complete “nights sleep”. The first went from 10:30pm-4:30am and the second went from 5am-9am. They are so scarily similar in length I feel dreadfully bad for Brett who missed out on that second one. The one that really made the difference.

it is time

So, sorry havent blogged in a while. meh. Saturday I worked and then vegged out on the couch followed by a small birthday gathering at the Drakes house. Sunday was church ( I am still really liking Fellowship Bible Church-and am really praying about how God might want us to fit there...) and then off to Seattle where the following happened:

-went to the Science Fiction Museum/Experience Music Museum
-talked to Penny on the phone in museum, therefore saw hardly any of it.
-decided it wasnt a great loss
-got lost three times
-got heckled by drunken Seahawk football fans
-ate a fabulous milkshake ( strawberry cheesecake? yes please.)
-stood in a long line of Emo Children ( and when I say children, I mean under the age of 21...) ranging in levels of annoying.
-played "Movies that start with the Letter *blank*" with Chuck, Wes, Bethany and Brett while we waited for our long line to move.
-pushed through crowds of Emo Children to stand for literally HOURS to see three sets of music ( some dude not worth mentioning, Augustana-who turned out to be really refreshing and good, Dashboard Confessionals-so tired of standingandwaiting I hardly noticed whether I was disappointed or not)
-drove home very late at night, worrying about Brett having to get up at 4 the next morning.

Thus my weekend.
It was actually pretty good, and besides the bullet points very entertaining and memorable. If you need pictures to better appreciate it, see them here


However, this week is already turning out to be....trying. For one thing Brett is having to leave for work at 5, not only does this cut into sleeping time-but we've also not been able to have our quiet times together...this morning consisted of a prayer time in bed ( me praying in bed at 4:45 is really not very inspiring)...so that's hard. I am also not feeling very well-I'm kicking myself for the extended period of time I spent out in the elements on Sunday-and with only a light jacket, then getting overheated at a concert and standing up for hours...ummmm...way to take care of yourself there Miss I-like-to-get-pheumonia-and-other-illnesses-regularly.
But, I came home from work an hour early and slept on the couch for an hour and a half. Hopefully that helped. MEEEH!
Seriously, this 23 year old body is totally whimping out on me!
Speaking of which. I'm ALMOST twenty-four as of yesterday the count down to my birthday officially started. November 22 here we come! :-P

fridays. much better.

So, I feel I must write after yesterdays venting action....turned out Brett felt pretty awful this morning ( I didnt gloat about this at all-since its not like I WANTED him to feel bad) and therefore decided to stay home afterall-for which I was very glad....I will pretty much take any excuse necessary for Brett to get rest. And now he's sitting at the dinningroom table playing with his new Magic cards he bought on Ebay...so I think he's doing much better.

Work was also not horrible-back to my usual routine of making customers happy... without my boss there to see it. *sigh*...but anyway, I figure my tips speak for themselves...and I'm just going to be prepared the next time he's in the shop to be even MORE awesome.

As for the car loan, I called and got it all sorted out this morning-I even made a long term payment decision which I think is a good one. I'm relying on the math skills I learned from Mrs. Clark in 12th grade so, meh, what can I say?
I turns out I DID know more than the "loan officer" at the bank-she put me on hold to figure out our interest, during which time I figured it out and then when she came back on the phone she told me "the equation I could use to figure out my interest" in which she said "multiply by 365 days" and I responded with, "dont you mean divide?!"
I felt totally vindicated for the trial they'd put me through....

So, ok, maybe I over reacted yesterday...or MAYBE it was just about time I had a breakdown....hahaha. Whatever the case, I'm reeeeeally glad its friday. We're going to see Dashboard Confessionals on Sunday and I'm TOTALLY dressing up as an emo chick. I even have skinny black pants JUST for the occasion! hahaha...

bad.

Brett has decided to go back to work tomorrow even though he got his wisdom teeth taken out today. Reason? Because his boss wouldnt like it if he missed work.

I realized that the bank financing our car charged us a $200 fee for paying more than our monthly balance. 200 dollars. This was not part of the agreement. Or so I thought.

I also got reprimanded by my boss for: toasting the panini's so that the grill lines go vertical rather than horizontal. for not "finding busy work to do when you dont have customers". Not making a particular drink exactly to his specifications ( which I couldnt remember at the time)...


I feel incredibly like everything is out of my control. That no matter how hard I try. things arent working out as I would have hoped.

the land of the living

I promise I'm trying to take it slow...but I am just SO HAPPY to be back at work, back in the land of the living. I really do love my job-all my regulars asking where I'd been-the fun of juggling a bunch of orders all at once-the smell of coffee-the warm lighting that makes the rainy gray day outside look a little less gray-arranging the pastries so they look their yummiest...

My toes are currently painted a sparkly red that looks remarkably like Dorothy's ruby slippers from the Wizard of Oz, its a pitty I am constantly having to put socks on because my feet are cold-otherwise I'd be tempted to look at my feet all the time. Did I mention that its officially cold outside?! *sigh* I have already forgotten what "hot" is like....what I do enjoy is all the colors of the trees...gorgeous oranges, reds, yellows...I really need to start taking pictures-but I usually just notice them when I'm driving ( not the best time to take pictures-not that I havent tried).

I'm making homemade Chili when I get off work-one of Brett's friends from Ranger School is in town for a day so we're having him and Charlie over for dinner ( Charlie just got back from Iraq and we still havent had him over yet!)...my first attempt at really cooking since the pheumonia. blah. Hope all goes well, I think I'm actually TIRED of take out.

sleepin with the fishes

So, Sunday morning we woke up to a very awful smell coming from the kitchen....after a small amount of investigating ( "what's that brown puddle by the fridge?!" ) it turns out an entire bottle of fish sauce exploded in the fridge....much cleaning later and the smell is STILL HERE!!!

It is literally driving me crazy, I dont know if you've ever smelled fish sauce ( used in many Thai dishes and other asian foods) but it smells exactly like its name. FISHY. NASTY. NO GOOD. NOT FRESH.
Anyway, I cleaned the fridge AGAIN this morning, have three candles lite, and one Bath & Bodyworks plug in, plugged in in the kitchen and stillllll I smell it.

I'm wonder if its still hiding somewhere? I'm wondering if it'll ever go away? I'm wondering if life will ever be the same???

In other news, I'm going back to work tomorrow...I'm really looking forward to it, although, I'm a tad nervous that I wont be able to make it or something....that I'll have a coughing fit ON a customer, or I'll faint from standing up longer than I have in weeks...buuuut, I'm sure its going to be fine. Yesterday Brett and I went shopping ( Brett looks soooo hooooot in the clothes I picked out for him. hehe) and I made it through that relatively unscathed. So, back to work I go!

Did I tell you we tried out a new church yesterday? Well, we did. And I am happy to say there was NOTHING I disliked about it! Seriously! Good Bible TEACHING ( who knew this was so hard to find) and the worship was not dead and the people were extremely friendly and warm!! So, I am excited about future church-going....
I am also excited about Andrew's Bible study that he's leading on Thursday nights-and I'm actually enjoying the "40 days of Community" ( circa purpose driven life guy) bible study we're going to on Wednesday nights ( which is shocking...I had such a bad attitude about this particular endeavor...). So, the week is offically full and I'm also trying to be all healthy ( went to health food store today just to prove it.) and sleeping lots etc....so yes. That's me.

Oh, and Brett is getting two of his wisdom teeth taken out on Thursday...this means he gets Thursday and Friday off from work...this does not make up for the fact that he has to leave for work at 5am every day next week ( proving my theory that Army is sloooowly pushing their mornings earlier and earlier and their evenings later and later until one day Brett will not come home at all)....or the fact that he as 24 hr. duty the day after Thanksgiving ( meaning he wont even be home for DINNER that night! BOO!). I'm saying all this here because I know I need to be more encouraging and support of Brett and Evil Army-because I am continually impressed at his positive attitude, when he DOES have even the inkling of a bad attitude he's immediately all over it, putting an end to it some how ( with God's help)....so I must continually pray for help in this area too. This is life.

things to do while you're sick.

I went shopping today. Not that Old Navy counts as shopping...but the fact that I stood up and walked around for over ten minutes was a major feat....and then I "rested" in the movie The Jane Austen Bookclub, which I actually really enjoyed...it was so much nicer than that "other stupid Jane Austen movie" that came out recently...this one was present-day, not even pretending to be ALL UPONS Jane...and since I just finished reading "Persuasion" this morning it was timely....and on the way home I picked up Little Caesar's Pizza ( which JUST OPENED DOWN THE ROAD FROM OUR HOUSE!!!!!! YESSSSSS)...because cooking is still way difficult-and besides, I loooove LC.
In other news, Andrew Stroud-one of the Navigator leader dudes-called and his family is making Brett and I dinner tomorrow because I've been sick. How incredibly sweet is that?!
So, its been a nice day. And I'm officially going back to work on Tuesday. So more naps are in my future-all very healthy and recover-y of me.

healthy living...

So, I've gotten so many emails from friends over the last few days commenting on how I get sick so often! Boy, I agree. And last night, when I couldnt sleep I vowed that I was going to start taking a multi-vitamin.
I know. lame, right? Like a multi-vitamin is going to stop the pheumonia. But, SERIOUSLY, here people, I'm getting a bit desparate! I mean, I exercise, get good sleep, eat healthy-ish, I dont smoke, I dont drink....what more can we ask?!
So, multi-vitamin it is.

As for the pheumonia. I am officially, "out of the woods"....or something.
I went and saw the pulmonlogist (spelling? meh.) today and he was like, "looks good, very important that you got on antibiotics right away, you'll be good as new...oooooh.....around christmas."

Yup, long recovery period. Of course, this sucks because if you could see my bathroom floor right now, you'd know that I need to be doing more than watching Gilmore Girls and naping all day.... I hate making Brett clean things he doesnt even notice, but bathroom floors and bathtubs are pretty much not on his radar at all, bless him...they are on mine, unfortunately ( not for any one than visits us, however).
And speaking of visitors, this is SUCH a bad time for me to be "recovering" for 8 weeks....I reeeeally wanted to go to some of the fall festivals around the area, I wanted to go shopping to buy Brett a winter coat that ISNT a jersey hoodie ( how he's lived without me is beyond my comprehension...of course, I have three coats, two jackets and a million sweaters and look which one of us has pheumonia...), I wanted to go to the Dashboard Confessionals Concert at the end of this month ( but would it be RIGHT?! to be out so late, at a concert when you're "recovering"???), plus I've got to do some serious scouting work for the preparation of the visitors who are taking up the month of November ( yay! Louise, The Parents, Josh, Anna and Ryan....), oh, and did I mention I'd like to be feeling all recovered for my BIRTHDAY and THANKSGIVING?!
*sigh*
I'm bummed, being sick stinks.

In other news, my doctor ( can't pronounce his russian name) was very cool and felt like it was crazy that anyone even MENTIONED that I had TB....he also showed me my awesome chest x-ray, which showed my pheumonia ALL over my right lung! It looked incredibly cool, and also really explained why I cant breath well...

modern medicine.

It is amazing to finally take drugs that are specifically for what you have and are not just over the counter "feel a little better for an hour" drugs.

Today I feel moderately better than yesterday. Of course, yesterday was record low with me on the bathroom crying about how I couldnt breath followed shortly by projectile tomatoe soup....honestly. Poor Brett. I dont know how many stars he got in his crown in heaven, I lost count after about fifty....Anyway, so today I'm feeling mildly better, breathing a lot easier although my throat hurts-which is a new symptom. nice.

In other news, Brett bought me the sixth season of Gilmore Girls, and has even suffered through many episodes with me-only making snide comments after several hours. Honestly, what a great show. And I think it's teaching him even more about women-kind than he'd ever want to know.

Anyway, just didnt want to leave everyone hanging with yesterdays bad news....I think I'm going to live.

pneumonia

After a fun filled day at the hospital, one chest x-ray, one chest CT, blood taken from my veins and the promise of a TB test in the coming week at has been decided that I have...pneumonia.
Oh, and possibly Tuberculosis. WHAT?! How do you just throw that in at the end like that?! Because that's exactly what the good PA did.
She was like, "you have pheumonia, here's what we're gonna do to make you better, off you go now...."
and then.
"wait, hold on...."
and then 15 minutes later...
"and there is this other legend ( maybe like the Legend in the bible, I dont know) over here on your lungs that the radiologist didnt see before...it maybe TB...have you been out of the country recently?!"

So, yes, I'm not really worried about the possible TB.
I am a bit worried about the pneumonia and just how much longer I'm going to think I'm choking to death slowly.

Anyway. if you think about it. pray for me. Pray for Brett. Bless his heart, he did not sign on to be a nurse.

so then I ran into a poll...

I've been on a LOT of flu/cold meds of late...as in my whole mind is a foggy mess. So, that is my only "good" excuse for scrapping one of the two polls that is annoyingly two inchs from our assigned parking spot at the apartments. It left some blue paint on the front bumper of the Prius. I'm so upset with myself. And the worst part is having to tell Brett. Not that I think he'll be mean about it or anything...its just so awful to ruin something that's been all pretty and perfect up until now.

I'm coughing a lot in strange intervals. Last night, I would wake up, *bing* and be like, "why am I awake?" and then it would hit and I would realize I was choking and I'd cough and cough...finally I'd fall back into my "nyquil induced" sleep only to have the process repeat itself in the not so distant future of the night.
uggg.

hey, arent these blog posts fabulous to read?! I just realized that it may not be that interesting to read about my symptoms. So that's all for today.

weak coffee isnt work it ( I mean, worth it)

I am so weak. I stand up for a few minutes and then I really want to sit down. So far work as been ok. Slow enough. But, usually Tuesday mornings do not afford this much sitting-but I can hope for a miracle, right?

I was just told that people on the West coast get the flu earlier in the year because they are the closest port to asia which is where the flu comes from. whatever. I bet someone is putting my leg.

totally hot stuff!

So, soon after my last post on Thursday ( was that when that was?!) I had a very near breakdown at work...I had no idea just how HARD my job actually is, until I was using all of my strength to continue standing up right and not passing out-and then I realized that my job requires a lot of patience ( didnt have any of that), multitasking ( none), and a LOT of fast moving ( definitely not) ....it started slowly enough, a few customers trickled in, I was freezing and wearing three layers of clothing, but waiting on them wasnt too much for me...but then the line behind them started to get longer and longer, and people with screaming babies demanding toasted pizza-bagels arrived and I went from freezing to sweating profusely relatively quickly...
I'll leave out the details of me crying a few tears into my apron behind the counter, but lets just say I prayed for a solid two hours that I would be able to make it till 4:30.
I did.
I made it, and then I "lived" in bed or on the couch for the next three days....make that four, because today this is really the first time I've been up in the vertical position and I'm not really liking it that much, to be honest. My head is way stuffy and I'm coughing continually and while the fevers have subsided-I've felt way better....but I'm testing the waters of "living" again, just to see if its possible to maybe spread some of these flu germs other than on my husband, but maaaaybe on some customers, hmmm?
( but seriously, every time I was whimpering in a shivering/sweating ball I was also praying really really hard that Brett didnt catch whatever evil early-flu I had...and you can continue to help me pray this prayer, because as HORRIBLE HELL as it was for me, at least I could take the day off today...its way harder to tell Army that. ( I watched a lot of Arrested Development this weekend).

So, while I continue to push myself to stay in the upright position I must tell you that one good thing has come from this sickness ( not really, I stretch)...Brett bought a themometer. Holy Cow! In the Abt family that was possibly one of the greatest weapons of sickness a child could use-of course it was a gamble. I mean, no one ever ever argued with a fever ( even a teeny tiny one...my mother delighted in fevers) but then again, if you didnt have one your sickness just might be questioned and that could lead down a road you didnt really want to go down...buuuut, nonetheless...as a child who very rarely had fevers I always felt a little bit triumphant when I did produce a few decimal points more than your typical 98.6.
And, to tell you the truth I was a bit relieved that it wasnt all in my head and that my feelings of impending death were being brought on by the 102.7, 103.5 tempature action my body was producing...however the relief was short lived and followed by tears.
And speaking of short lived if this post seems to be ending abruptly that's because it is....my head feels like its going to explode. Apparently 45 minutes is my maximum time frame.
Back to bed and Season Two of The Office....

guilty sleep.

Honestly! I wish I didnt feel guilty when I decide to not do certain things- I mean, come on! I made the decision, deal with it!
Silly mind.

I'm not feeling well. Not well at all. Its kinda silly too. I dont have very defined symptoms besides, "every bone in my body wants to fall off" and "my throat is thirsty all the time"

I dont feel like those should be reasons for me to just STOP life, but basically I laid on the couch for six hours after work yesterday, only to get up to re-fill my water bottle and pee....oh, and i did get up at one point and dusted the entire living areas of our house and do basic "clean up"...because, "dog gone it, I'd said I was going to clean house today and no stupid aching was going to stop me!" In truth I felt horrible and I still do, after sleeping 12 hours last night.
Yet, even with all that I feel guilty, I feel guilty that I havent cleaned the whole apartment, that I havent emailed people back that I know I need to, that I havent finished Bible Study for tonight, that I didnt get up with Brett this morning at 4:30.
meh.

time will tell

So, its been a few days since my last post and I suppose in some ways there is a lot I could write about...like the fabulous day trip Brett and I took on Saturday ( which you can see pictures of here) that was absolutely a gift from God. Yup, that's right sometimes you think that days are so perfect that you just know that some how God was looking down and making sure nothing messed it up, and that all the right things crossed your path ( like the Little Caesars Pizza which fell directly into our laps on the way home...) or the Sunday we spent writing thank you notes....or yesterday when I made stir fried fresh veggies ( because I couldnt remember the last time we'd eaten any veggies and i felt like a bad person) and we watched Mostly Martha...

But, mostly, things have been so delightfully common place. And I say delightfully because I'm just glad Brett is at home.

thanks for...

beautiful friends...Katie, Thida, Lydia ( Louise and Amy-I missed calls from BOTH of them. But, hopefully talk to them soon too!) and their beautiful lives which I am blessed to be a part of, even from afar.

Cool surprises...Wes coming by and visiting me at work:



ANNNNND...Brett got to come home early! YAY!!! With roses. AW!!!

thursday. one. more. day.

So, yesterday, I had lunch with Michelle ( my Locoste friend that gave me her number) at this ADORABLE french restaurant down by the Sound in Steilacoom. it was a beautiful day, sunny ( not warm) and the water positively sparkled. And I ate Creme Brulee because, the restaurant was name La Creme Brulee so I figured it was a good bet. It was.
It was also interesting to learn about a new person, Michelle's husband is coming back from Iraq this week...they have never actually lived together even though they've been married for over a year...that's the army for you!

I also got a pedicure yesterday, it was kinda expensive and not really the best experience ever-but, hey, there is only one way to find out about these places, right? And at least my toes are really pretty now. ;-)

I am looking forward to some phone dates today, as much as I've enjoyed the past few days of new friends-no one can replace the ones I already have! I miss you guys! :-)

above.

So, I drove into Seattle last night, turned a corner and there I was-in the middle of the "student ghetto". ( where University of Washington and Southern Pacific University collide). It was SO MUCH like Dunedin ( down to the weather, the hills, the random ethnic food stalls pressed up against clothing stores and coffee shops) with the young people everywhere that I felt this odd since of loneliness and homesickness all at once. It was hard to explain at the time, but it was if I realized I was no longer part of that type of society. Everyone there was in some cool club that I couldnt join....a club where all you really worry about is making it to class and possibly going to some part time job that really just bankrolls your fun....

At the same time I didnt really want to join. I do not envy anyone new having to come into that enviroment of Washington University and deciding where they fit in all the...heathen-ness ( that's the best way to discribe it). I was reminded of the newness of arriving in Dunedin and being shocked and excited all at the same time, possibilites and pitfalls all in the same place....

But, before I could really hyperventilate for all the nostaligic stress, I found a vintage clothing store that BLEW MY MIND!!! I bought two fantastic sweaters ( one a sweater dress) and an adorable shirt....all name brands and in perfect condition for low low prices ( I wont even tell you how much I paid, you'll be too jealous). And then it was time to meet my new friend Brittany.
We ate at this Mongolian grill, where you pick all these fresh veggies/meats/noodles and sauces through a buffet type line and then give it to the grill guy and he grills it all up for you! Genius!
So, my blind date with Brittany went really well, I liked her immediately and we hit it off on all types of topics. I am now just pondering how best I can be a friend to her in this coming year. She is working as a missionary with the students on the University campus and I live about an hour ( in good traffic) away from her. But, after talking to her I know that catching up with her will definitely be a benefitual thing. We are in "technically" very different situations, and yet also very similar struggles and I enjoyed giving her a few peptalks regarding the getting started and not doubting ones place and purpose in such a new and different enviroment....and even as I talked, I realized the pep talk was just as much for me as it was for her.

So, as I headed home from Seattle, passing the glowing sky line of Seattle's downtown, I was struck that I'd been given my answer. My time away from Brett will never be without things to do-because I'm just as special to God as an individual as I am as a couple...sure, that seems simple, but it was if I forgot that fact. That my purpose was somehow stripped because he was gone-but, let me tell you, there are things-like sitting and talking for hours with another girl that Brett, bless him, would neither enjoy or benefit....and yet, I know that is part of my life that I will never give up. There will always be girls that I need to have bosom chats with, girls to laugh and help and love and cry with....I havent met all these girls yet, and some I am just getting to that point of 'depth' with, and yet it was confirmed that its something I love doing. It was interesting something that Brittany said last night, in almost a surprised voice,

Even though I am working as a missionary, where I am purposefully trying to build relationships with people and figure out where I can fit into peoples lives and help them towards Christ. That isn't different from what you are doing at all!


Yes, indeed. And if I can show Brittany ( and myself) that we are ALL called to a mission field of type and that it is truly our purpose and calling every single day-whether we get our funds for living from a coffee shop job or from a church pay check-we all have the same job. And last night it was confirmed, once again, that God has not completely taken away my ability to have meaningful relationships with girls-just because I'm surrounded by boys all day.
Whew.

...

my mindseye

Last night I dreamed I was in high school but had some how forgotten, and therefore I was failing calculus because I hadnt been to class in weeks...this has been a reaccuring dream of late. Its like, dreams are going along just fine and then someone reminds me, 'hey, arent you in calculus right now?!" And then I remember that I totally forgot.
Weird. It's been Six years since I graduated high school.

In other news, the dishwashing soap at work is the exact same soap we had in the house tutor lounge at Carrington....it brings back in a great rush of memories all my time living at Carrington every time I smell it. Ahhhhhh! College. Its been three years since I graduated. Time flies.


In other news, pictures of the guest room. Makes you want to come and stay doesn t it? ( Notice Brett's army stuff on the bed, that's because this room doubles as his "extra closet" and houses army stuff galore...)
Sorry the before picture is blurry...I wasnt really in the state of mind at the time to make sure the picture was clear. Ah well, you get the idea, right? ;-)

days and nights and pictures

So, it seems I'm going to have to actually DECIDE what I'm going to do with my days...I've got actual options! Which is pretty crazy, but...the nights. Tonight's kinda sad.

Anyway, did I mention I'm having dinner with Sarah's friend Brittany tomorrow evening ( in Seattle. woo traffic. ) ?! ( Sarah is Brett's friend from College...Brittany is my new blind date friend). We some how made it through a possible akward conversation with some good humor and talk of Mangolian food. Like her already. So, that's tomorrow.

And speaking of dinner here are pictures of our dining room....

big girls dont cry...

So, Brett left this morning for five days. I am really praying that I have some sort of revelation while he's gone into just HOW I am suppose to see these times when he is away?!
"needless suffering" is currently not cutting it. ;-)

This week was really interesting, on Saturday we headed north ( about 2.5 hours) to a wedding of an old friend, Grace Damoff...and when I say "old" , I mean, we havent really hung out since we were about 4....but the wedding was really AMAZING....and I'll go into details sometime soon, but lets just say, breathtaking views, amazing food, fun company. We had a good time. And it reminded me that we really need to force ourselves to get out of the house on the weekends. I mean, its difficult since mostly you just want to sleep when you have free time-but where are the memories there?!

Anyway, yesterday I was suffering from the after affects of a migrane and spent the day on the couch. Luckily, it seemed we had weather to correspond with whatever plans we had: Saturday=beautiful Sunny skies, warm. Sunday=rainy, cold...But, it ended up being a nice day with Brett lazing around... So I suppose it all worked out.

However, today, its rainy and cold again ( apparently the high is 63) so I'm trying to be inspired to DO something...Speaking of doing something: I am scheduled to celebrate Brett and my one year anniversary of being together ( which is on Thursday for those who are interested) with a few hours of R&R....it actually worked out perfectly! Because i just randomly called this Spa that I had seen in Tacoma- a pink house situated high up on a hill....and made an appointment for a pedicure on Wednesday afternoon-knowing full well that I would probably have to cancel because I usually work on Wednesday afternoons. BUT, I look at the schedule for this week and guess what day I have off this week?! Wednesday!!! So, once again, I celebrate a milestone in our relationship alone....One month, the two month...the one year....all of them, the army has needed my husband's presence. Blah.

YAY! *and more pictures

So, last night, God answered my prayer in finding my photo/computer adapter thingy....our friend Chuck asked me for a bandaid. So I went and got him the box of bandaids out of our first aid bin ( and for any one from Uni remembers my Resident Assistant days...its huge) and brought it out to him...and low and behold I opened the box to find, not only bandaids...but my photo stick. yeah. long story.
But that's where it was. hahahaha!!

Anyway...

Here are more before and after pictures of the apartment.

The living room...
( you can guess which are befores...and which are afters...)

The new kind of dating..

You would think that once you are married the horriblness that is dating would be totally over. No more would you have to stress over first dates ( what will we talk about? What should I wear? What will they think of me?), or when to call someone....

But, low and behold, while I never really dated that much when I was single...I have now come across Friendship Dating.
Oh, maaaaan.
Today, I am being set up for lunch with my mother-in-law's good friend's daughter.
I also met a really nice girl here at the coffee shop who I talked with for a while during a lull in customers, and when she left she left me her number on a scratch piece of paper....
And my friend Sarah emailed me with the name and number of a friend of her's who just moved to Seattle who she laughingly said she wanted to set me up on a "friend blind date".

I now feel really sorry for guys having to get up the nerve to hang out with a girl. Its a lot harder now then when I was in college, you dont have that 'common bond' of going to the same school etc. Anyway, at the same time don't think I'm complaining...maybe I wont be a TOTAL cat woman, minus the cats next week.

Perfectly Modern Woman

Today Brett and I will be married two months. I’m pretty sure that’s the go buy fresh milk anniversary.
But our marriage will have been officially longer than many a celebrity marriage and therefore cause for some pause.. And I have to say its been two of the longest/shortest two months of my life. I guess that’s sort of how it always is when I go through huge life altering changes ( which seems to be my lot). This particular change has been different from the past ones, my other major life moves. And for those of you who missed out on the life-crisis of 2002 and then the follow-up crisis of 2005, I am glad you have joined us with the life crisis of 2007. Oh wait, I’ve some how given the impression that my marriage is some sort of “crisis”…which really isn’t fair. I’d say the crisis parts have been more the “military wife” the “what to do now, oh how about be a barista” or the “now I live in Washington and therefore only have three friends” stuff that has created crisis in my little easily -thrown–off- self. When I enter crisis mode, it seems that everything is magnified and time becomes tangible, days passing becomes some sort of monumental achievement.
But, what have I actually achieved? What have I learned in this particularly short amount of time? Here are my thoughts on life as a married women so far:
Being a military wife sucks. In response to me saying I hated the military’s idea of “working hours” ( for example, Brett left at 5 am yesterday morning…got home at 1am and after seeing him for 5 minutes this morning, as he put his uniform on, he is gone yet again…) , Brett said he had not hidden his working schedule from me before we were married, to which I said, “People do not hide the fact that child birth hurts like hell, but then when you actually go through it yourself, the fact that you KNEW it would hurt doesn’t make it less painful.” Profound, I know. Me equating being a military wife to child birth ( this is ironic since it seems to me that most military wives are either pregnant or have five children or both…). And yes that conversation happened in a particular “complain-y” time…and you should be thankful I’d share such a bad moment with you… Anyway, I have realized ( as of yesterday) that I was actually ruining all the perfectly good and decent time that I DID have with Brett with my totally bad attitude. In a lot of ways I am jealous of the military. It’s like the worst Other Women ever. Because this other women gives me free medical care…just kidding, but hopefully you do understand what I’m saying
I guess my point is that I know that there is no question here, there is no changing the way things are, you see, I am actually incredibly proud of Brett and the incredible amount of diligence and integrity that he gives to his job, he takes it very seriously and does not cut many of the corners that so many around him do day in and day out. He generally has a very good attitude and I hardly ever hear him complain ( maybe because I’m complaining so loudly…hahaha) but seriously, He is truly a light in a dark place, and often the only positive interaction that many have with a Believer. Period. And as the days continue on, I see more and more how important it is that he is doing what he does. And along with that realization, I am also having to come to grips that my marriage is going to have to be different. I don’t get to spend the “normal” amount of TIME with my husband that most people get and unfortunately, its only going to get worse, so I am going to have to throw out pretty much ALL my preconceptions of what marriage should be, and start afresh. Yes, it has taken me two months to realize this, and it’ll probably take me years to actually figure out the right way to go about this…but, hey, it’s a fun journey right?


So, here is something I wrote in my journal a while back-from the book “Gold Cord” by Amy Carmicheal , it is the creed that she and the women who joined her, lived by, and after reading it I was over come by its truth and also by how much I was lacking in many of the areas talked about :

“Teach us, good Lord, to serve Thee more, faithfully, to give and not to count the cost, to fight and not heed the wounds, to toil and not seek for rest, to labor and not ask for any reward, save that of knowing that we do Thy will, O lord our God”

I hesitate to even type it here for you, that you even know that it is my desire to be like this…since I lack these attitudes in my life so far, but Lord help me, for I do so very much want to be like this!

a pile of pictures

I've lost the card stick for my computer so I can put the pictures on my camera on the computer and therefore share the rest of the loverly pictures we have of the apartment, as well as a picture I took last night of the pants I found a goodwill for three dollars.
Yup, I found these silk indian wrap pants stuck in between some hideous early 90s print dresses...and they're really great, and the BEST part is I think they are going to fit perfectly the "casual elegant" dress code for the wedding we're attending on Saturday. I cant tell you what horrible trouble I've had with this vague and unhelpful dress code! I mean, suuuure technically with something that vague you cant officially go wrong...but I like to fit in! I like to look cool without it looking like I've tried to hard. Yes, I'm that lame.
Anyway. these pants are cool and I wanted to share them with you...but who KNOWS what happened to that converter! BOO!

In other news, I went on a date with myself last night. Saw The Nanny Diaries, ate Thai Satay Peanut Chicken...it was good except that I missed Brett the whole time.

can't.wake.up.

This mornings quiet time was a total wash. I dont even remember it. Of course, it happened at 4:30. So there's that. I'm thinking I'm going to have to go back and read all my bible readings again because it'll be BRAND NEW for the second time today...
However, I do really like getting up with Brett, ok "like" is a strong word...but I DO find that its more benefitual than I probably realize for us to do that together everyday.


I guess its good I had the third shift today...started at 11. Worked out at our apartment complex's gym...watched VH1's music videos, but even that didnt wake me up totally.

Brett is going to be working tonight ( should be home around midnight...)...so maybe I'll go see The Nanny Diaries, I've heard medicre reviews so I figured I wouldnt put Brett through "mediocre" chick-flicks ;-)

Well, on contemplation, I have no other news to share with you, except to say that I'm still really enjoying working at the coffee shop. I have never worked in the service industry for almost a month and a half without having any really rude customers before!! It really is a credit to the North Western Coffee Drinkers that our clintele is SO very friendly and nice! The down side to this is that nice people arent nearly the same kind of fodder for writing... ;-)

slowly going postal

Driving to Main post: 20 minutes
Getting a day pass for the Prius ( we dont have military tags for it yet): 20 minutes
Driving to Hospital Pharmacy: 10 minutes
Finding out the Pharmacy at Hospital does not do "outside prescriptions: 10 minutes
Driving to Pharmacy across post: 15 minutes
Waiting for Prescription at 2nd Pharmacy: 25 minutes
Finding out that TriCare has made a wrong notation on my records ( saying I'm a dependant not a spouse): 5 minutes
Driving back to Main Hospital to visit Medical Records: 15 minutes
Waiting in Medical Records: 35 minutes
Waiting at Main Pharmacy again(!), because 2nd pharmacy said they'd make an exception because of the TriCare error: 20 minutes
Waiting for Main Pharmacy employee to try to figure out how to "do something different" and fill the outside prescription: 35 minutes
Time it took for her supervior to do it once she finally called him: 5 minutes
Driving home with rush hour traffic 30 minutes

Total time for me to FINALLY get my prescription: 4 hours

Finally having my presciption: PRICELESS

~~

In other news, Brett and I went to the Puyallup Fair ( yeah, that's a real name!) last night...its the 6th largest fair in the country ( apparently) and it was pretty good fun, especially since it was the warmest day we've had all year ( 85 degrees and beautiful!)...lots of fun. Interesting Fact: Traditional Fair food in the northwest=scones. really weird. but totally yummy.

Hard.

So, last night at 6pmish, without warning I was informed that Brett was going to be gone for a week. Next week to be exact. The week of our one year anniversary...oh, and yeah, did I mention it was NEXT week?!

I'm not going to complain about it more than stating those facts, except to say that you dont know how totally and completely fragile and weak you are until one thing throws you for a loop and you have to wear your glasses to work on a Monday morning...not because of seeing exactly, just more so that people dont notice how rediculously puffy my eyes are this morning.

Honestly, I'm surprised at myself.

Of course, I'm already trying really hard to come up with something to make next week better....Hopefully, I'll get to work a lot...that'll keep me busy.
I'm actually working a lot this week, every day except Friday and Saturday! That's right, my first weekend shift is this Sunday. But, luckily its only a training shift so I'll be able to make it to church.

I'm still trying hard to get use to the church situation. Chapel is definitely not what I'm use to, and I'd almost resigned myself to the dead enviroment until this week when Wes, who is one of the Navigator leaders here at Fort Lewis ( Brett and I go to a Bible Study of his on Thursdays) preached this Sunday-and the whole PLACE was different...it makes me sad that the Chaplins are obviously considering this congregation just one of their many jobs, it shows. However, at the same time I am more and more resolved that it is where we are suppose to be, the people there deserve some life and I got a great email from Tabitha that was a great encouragment to me regarding my place in a church enviroment....of course, it means I have to be more proactive myself in going out and finding what I need to have a healthy spiritual life...

all work, and no blogging...

I'll be honest, I'm stressed out about my perscriptions. It's been on my mind for at least a month. I've got about a week and a half before they all run out. And then we'll really be in trouble. However, I'm sure I'm just over reacting. I'm sure that the beaurocracy that is the military healthcare system will come through and I'll get what I need just in time. I'm sure all my prayers will be answered. And probably the fact that I'm worrying is a lack of faith on my part.

Because I know things are going to turn out ok....somehow.

In other news I'm currently working the 11am to 4:30 shift. Its pretty slow, but tips havent been half bad. So I guess we'll call it a draw, since I am currently blogging from work. There is some odd since of comfort in the continuity of the jobs that God has given me...in that I am able to write at each of them. It makes me feel like I should be writing something more worthwhile...considering this blog has stood the test of three jobs, and have we gotten anything substancial from my writing throughout any of that?! I suppose that remains to be seen.

I just had our resident crazy guy steal tips from the tip jar when I was busy with a customers order early. To be honest I was ticked off with him. I think that has to be the rudest form of stealing....here I am "slaving away" and he takes my money while I'm not looking. jerk. Luckily he only took one or two dollars. I suppose it could have been worse.

This evening we're having Wes over for dinner, Wes just moved here from Georgia. Brett actually lived with Wes's family when he was living in Georgia and it makes me happy that we can continue the friendship they started there. I also really identify with Wes and what he's going through at the moment. I remember going off to New Zealand when I was fresh 18....and Wes, well he'll be turning 18 in a month or so...and he's already made some big decisions and moved across the country. I'm impressed. And at the same time I dont care how many important grown up decisions a person makes, they should still get to act like a 17 year old every once and a while...which is why I think Wes and I can be friends-I act like a 17 year old most of the time. ;-)

The Lord knows...

That I have to have a job where I can do internet business WHILE working! And, yes, we're back. Today has been slow and I just so happen to have brought my laptop to work ( it was meant for after work...but what the heck. no customers)...love the fast internet again!

Anyway, I'm trying to stay really positive today. Its a struggle since today is the beginning of real life once again. Brett is back to his 12 hour work days. great. See? Its tough to think that's some how a good thing. But, there are some things that need to get done around the house that I've been putting off til now. *sigh*

maybe I'll have something more inspiring to say later...

And we start...

So, I know years ago I promised you some before and after shots of the apartment. Well, I was kindly reminded of this fact by dear family this morning and so thus begins the installments of "The Wilson Apartment: Before and After"

And we'll just enter the house as though you were coming in the front door....

BEFORE:




AFTER:

siblings.

My sister is possibly the funniest person I know. She makes me laugh until my sides hurt and I have to gasp for air. The weird thing is, yesterday, after I got off the phone with her I remembered that even when I lived in New Zealand and I had the chance to talk to her on the phone, I would laugh till I cried-and we werent even great friends then! Not that being great friends with someone makes you laugh harder, I'm just saying my sister's been one of the most hilarious person since forever. So there. I makes me really proud she's my sister....and it also makes me sad that all the people I meet here haven't had the privilege of knowing her.

Really all my friends that are now scattered from here to the ends of the earth...I wish I could carry everyone around in my pocket!

So, today Brett has staff duty, meaning he'll be at work from about 6pm tonight until 6am in the morning. Boo! At the same time it'll prepare me for the inevitable of next week when the Army will essentially ask me for my husband back and thus the fight for time with Brett will officially recommence. Incidentally, next week I am going to my first "Buffalo Coffee" ( the Buffalo is, like, the mascot of Brett's brigade...and I bet I'd get in trouble for equating it with a mascot...but really that's what it is, isnt it?! ) with the other 'officers wives'....I'm getting ready to get my 'polite/chatty' face on. It'll be a nice change of pace from my usual company- single boys... so, see? I'm already being ultra positive about my forced socializing! good for me!

This evening I will, hopefully, get to do some NONforced socializing with "the girl who I helped with her budgeting" who will now be known as, Leah, her husband is coming home for about 9 months ( hopefully) on Tuesday-and I just so happen to know how annoyingly slow those last few days before someone finally gets home are...so I hope to take advantage of Brett's staff duty tonight and hang out with her! She's seriously a cool person ( a concert violinist from Alaska, just to name a few quick cool tidbits) and hopefully I'll get to hang out with her even after her husband returns....the army is odd like that, it makes everyone ultra selfish with there time, including myself....I still have so much to learn about this odd, odd world....

Missing people

I'm missing people like crazy today. I dont know exactly what happened, but I woke up this morning homesick for so many friends it took a while to pray for them all ( that's what I do when I'm homesick for someone).
*sigh*
Anyway, I love you, and even if I havent talked to you in a long time-I miss you.

~

And just so I dont start blubbering or something, Brett and I are loving Heroes. I think so far my favorite part is how excited Brett is about it. He's just so nerdy and cute. Of course, yesterday was record-awful because Brett didnt get home till 4 ( which I didnt know was going to happen- you know, me and PLANS) and all I wanted to do while I was waiting for him was watch Heroes. My self-control was incredible.
I should also mention that I'm probably going to need double the amount of prayers once Brett's work schedule goes back to normal-it is almost as if I forgot all about 6am-6pm...these last two weeks have been so terrific.

slow day.

There is now an edit at the bottom of this postI bet you never thought I'd come to this, or rather, I never thought I'd come to this.
Writing my blog on a paper bag more commonly used to put scones and other baked goods in 'to go'.
However, the last few days I've found that no matter how tired I am, at night as I am trying to fall asleep I compose blog posts in my head instead of sleeping. Annoying.
This just proves the therapeutic value of writing.
Not that it needs proving.
It proves we need internet, internet that isnt being scammed from neighbors and therefore is available in more than just the corner of the bedroom. The corner that Brett sleeps in, therefore making late-night blogging impossible.
Yesterday I bought the first season of Heroes. I've been super excited about this day ( the day it came out on DVD) since I saw the first episode on the internet many months ago. Then followed months of avoiding plotlines and waiting for the creators to finally put the season on little round disks, cleverly packaged, so I could see it all, from the beginning without interruptions. Needless to say, yesterday had been highly anticipated.
And after watching two episodes, Brett had to admit my excitement had been justified.

We had to stop watching after two episodes because we had "D" -a fellow literary enthusiast -over for dinner. It was great fun talking to him over homemade Thai food and snickerdoodles ( they turned out just like the picture! WOO!).
D is the most interesting comination of fascinating classical education, a lifetime of reading book after book as well as the experience of now being an enlisted Army Ranger. With his unassuming, extremely quiet voice-you'd never guess this as a guy who talked about Dante AND wanted to one day take advantage of the lucrative practice of smuggling precious gems out of the middle east.
As we talked to him, I couldnt help trying to imagine him in the middle of a battle somewhere....so often the Army surprises me. Or, at least, the people in the army surprise me. There is definitely a lot more to it than what is on CNN. Or Fox news. These are real live people. All sorts of people.
So there's that.

I've also been meaning to bring up the book I just finished reading on Friday, "Jane Austen: Life and Letters". The book is fascinatingly uneventful-as was Jane's life ( this brings me to a side point of recommending you NOT go see the movie out in theaters called "Becoming Jane", even though I haven't seen it-It is obvious that it grossly ignores the truth and instead scams off all of her novels for its plot line. Disgusting. ) Instead this book gives you the bare facts as well as letters between Jane and, mostly her sister, along with a few other people to give you a pretty in depth look at her life. I was delighted that her letters ( as well as, interestingly enough those of her correspondence) were so incredibly close to the way all the characters in her books talked that I realized I should not hope for grandeur. If I ever end up being published, you better believe its going to sound JUST like this blog!!!
Anyway, the book was fascinating, if not incredibly dry and probably only to be enjoyed by the nerdy. Yet, I loved the relationship between Jane and her sister Cassandra. It made me miss my sister so much!! And at the end of the book, as I read the final letters of Cassandra's accounting Jane's death to another well loved family member-I cried.
It was SO beautiful and touching! And I felt like I had just lost a friend too.
Oh, and I cried in the coffee shop during my break. So yeah, there's that too.
Edit: I am basically just telling you WHEN and WHERE I cried over the death of Jane Austen, not that I cried on my break at work on TOP of cry over Jane Austen....yeah, I know, my writing skills pretty much need editing, maybe THAT will be the difference between the blog and my future book. editing.

Hands Down ( written last night, late)

So, this past week won "Bet Week Thus Far" in a unanimous vote among me, myself and I. I can't ask Brett because he's asleep right now. Apparently the fact that I will have to wake up at 4:30 ( only a few short hours away) makes no difference to my silly body, which refuses to stop thinking and sleep. Anyway, I can't ask Brett to agree/disagree with my statement but I'd hazard a guess that he'd agree. Afterall, working half days and then getting Friday off really helps the weeks overall outlook.
It meant I got a better rested, not as stressed not as consumed with work Brett. This equals goood.
So, let's back track. Thursday night I watched Transformers the Movie with Brett. I know you're thinking, "But, Abigail ! Wait a minute, didnt you go see this movie just a few days before! Isnt that just repeating yourself?!"
We'll you'd be wrong my friend. Thurday I had the pleasure of watching the Cartoon transformers movie. A movie that, according to my sources, is far far superior to the movie currently in the theaters. Unfortunately, I was not able to vouch for this opinion, because as I was watching said movie, I was developing a headache beyond all headaches. By the time the movie was over my head had grown to the size of a large prize-winning watermelon and its weight was something along the lines of a cannon ball. Suffice to ay, I have not have a migraine that bad in a long long time. In fact, it was sooo bad that, while I thought I was going to die, I did not have the energy to say so....which was a good indicator to Brett that things were in fact serious ( Usually, I am beyond vocal about my current state of wellbeing or lack thereof). The headache had subsided some by friday-but let me tell you, it has been such a whopper that its reared its ugly head several times this weekend. Nasty. I must not be use to some sort of pressure system or allergy action up here...

In other news, not relating to my health. Another reason this eek was so levely in my eyes was that we were actually social. We had people over on Thursday. Friday. And Saturday!
*sigh* I couldn't have been happier.
Of course, today as I was washing a hug mound of dishes for the fourth time in a row I decided that my new ministry was turning out to be dish washing. Which was kind of a shock. But, I think the most shocking thing was that I didnt really even mind!
I am still finding odd satisfaction in feeding people and then washing their dishes while they play video games afterwards. This is odd, because it goes against all my feminist wiles. I mean, ME be some sort of "girl in the kitchen"!? Shocking!!

I've decided the main reason it's ok, is that it was my choice. And every time I've done the dishes I've had at least one person offer to help, or take over entirely. ( such well behaved boys!)


Another cool thing about this weekend, was that I got to get a teensy tiny taste of the coolness that is Seattle. Of course, the taste was ruined by bad weather, horrible traffice, and a whole hoard of evil tourists, but even with all that, I could still tell that I really like Seattle and that it had a lot of potential for cool atmosphere in the future ( preferably a weekday, with good weather, and therefore less tourists and much better traffic).
I am now praying for someone cool to go back to Seattle with, someone who wont mind stopping every few seconds to take pictures or just browse in some shop or other. *sigh*

irony. and other such stuff.

So, before you start thinking I'm, like, an awesome barista and have affectively managed to run into zero problems working in a coffee shop for a whole week. Think again.
Because, first of all, where would you get off thinking something like that of me anyway? We all know I'm a dropper.
Case in point:
Today, I was happily making a smoothie. Simple, right? I mean, all you do is pour the concentrated smoothie juice into the blender, fill the appropriate sized cup with ice, add that to blender. Turn blender on...
And this is where the "simple" ended for me today. There I was blending with the best of them, and ALL OF A SUDDEN the blender ATE the little stick thing you stick inside the blender to move the liquid around ( whatever that's called) and the top FLEW off hitting the wall and bouncing back to hit me square the chest, in the process smoothie parts are being FLUNG all over me, the wall and the floor.
I would also like to add that the apron I was wearing failed me BIG TIME, because some how all the smoothie managed to allude the front of the apron and instead sneak down the small opening between said apron and my shirt....leaving a LOT on my shirt and NOTHING on the apron.
Oh, and it got on my face, and my hair.

Of course, I blew the whole thing off, and I'm sure the person who I was making the smoothie for thought it was all part of my artistic process.....


That's all for today...I must return to the living room where I left Brett writing thank you notes. It turns out Brett takes quite a lot of pride in writing his thank you notes, because he is so proud of them he continually reads them out loud to me when he finishes, laughing to himself at his clever banter about china and sliverware. Bless him. One of the many reasons I married him. He takes writing so seriously ;-)

my favorite..

That is genuine happiness right there...

A few days ago...

Today was rainy and down right cold ( ok, so it was in the 60s but for AUGUST it might as well be cold)...but, it reminded me that I'd taken these pictures last week when I went to pick Brett up from work. So you can visualize what we see when Brett drives to and from work...You can also see how bored I got while waiting for him outside the gate ( this was before I got the tags for the car...)

reaping my reward

So, today was my first FULL shift of work. It was relatively painless, of course, I still have a constant babysitter to get me out of trouble if I get too overloaded, or I have a mind blank and somehow can't remember for the life of me how to do anything. But, never the less, I was still very proud when I sat down for my 15 minute break with a latte I'd made with my own two hands, and it wasnt half bad!!! SHOCKING!!!
I was so excited I texted Christa :-) This afternoon was extra nice because Brett got off work early. In fact, he tells me that he'll get off early for the next two weeks because his Unit is on mass leave or something of that nature ( I'm sure it has a technical name that alludes me at the moment). Of course, I will believe it when I see it ( Brett getting off early).
In fact, we bet on it.
I lost 500 dollars today since he did, infact, get off early.
I feel like its 500 dollars I'm happy to loose if it means I get to hang out with Brett.

Incidentally, in case you are wondering, Brett and I will often find ourselves differing in opinion on various things ( shocking, I know) but at times like that we will often bet on who is right. We always bet $500 because its a nice number. I am sure one day I'll call in my debts and Brett will owe me thousands but till then I'm happy to rest in the fact that I am right (sometimes). ;-)

Soooo, this afternoon was good. We went and saw Transformers. Brett had already seen it with his brothers, but I felt like I needed to experience the movie too. I am really glad I did. It gave me such a clear picture of what Brett was like as a little boy ;-)

We also got mail today. Really good mail ( not just circulars for Target and RiteAid). I got a REAL letter from Esther. Which, of course, made me miss her terribly. And we got two books from my parents!!! Yay!!!

Of course, two new books puts me in quite the moral quandary (ummm...not really). Since, just yesterday I realized I was currently reading four books at once-something I NEVER do!!!! I decided then and there I would focus on one until it was through and then move on to the next and so on...
but now, now I am EVER so tempted to start yet another one. Just a taste...

gah!!

I KNOW! I said I was going to post every day! And then I didn't.
Horrible.

But, I have excuses:

Brett finally returned to me ( in all his stinky-I-havent-showered-in-three-days glory) on Thursday night...and so I got to see him for a few hours before Friday happened and I spent ALLLLL DAAAAAAAY in the apartment by myself watching Lonely Girl 15 on Youtube-yes I am that lame. ( weather wasnt the best and brett took the car to work. boo.)

Once again, this whole being couped up with no life did wonders for my personality and I was an absolute DE-light when Brett got home from work ( sarcasm included). poor guy.
But, I had to pray hard because almost immediately after getting home from work we had to head to a work-FUNCTION. Meaning, *i* had to go and meet all sorts of people, people Brett works with, Brett's bosses....it wasnt a DREADFUL time by any means, but combine my already negative attitude + freezing weather+ forced to be outdoors at a "picnic" +food being an hour and a half late+ meeting new people and well....it was hard.
I am, however, glad that I got to put some faces with some names...and it was kind of interesting to be able to make some first impressions for myself about these people that Brett spends MOST of his time with.
Oh. And the Brigade gave me flowers to welcome me. awwwwwww.

In other news, yesterday Brett and I were absolute grown ups. We bought a car.
Yup, we sure did. And now, for better or for worse we are the proud owners of a 2007 Toyota Prius Hybrid. We got a pretty good deal since the car had already had one owner who had driven the car for a grand total of 2,000 miles. hehehe. So, that worked out. Of course, I always said I would NEVER EVER buy a white car ( since that is pretty much the only thing my parents drive and you know what they say about kids rebelling....) buuuut....you'd be surprised what the enticements of a good deal will do to change your opinion.

Ok! So now you're officially caught up on my ultra exciting life and times. I think Brett and I are going to see Transformers this afternoon ( I STILL havent seen it!) as part of a winding down process in preparation for next week. Tomorrow. First day of official work.

another day, another post

So, I PROMISED I would post more, so here I am with nothing interesting to tell you, except that I successfully got vehicle registration from the Department of Defense....the ol' taurus can now frequent any military base it wants to. so there.

The other exciting things I did today include:
I bought a Brita filter....for the faucet. How UPSCALE is that!?! I know, I was shocked at the luxury too. But, I thought, what the heck it was 5 dollars off...

Ironically, I told a possible-friend-candidate ( as in, I like her...but will SHE like ME?! ) that I would help her sort out her budget.
I'm going with the mantra "what you can't do. teach."

Other than that, I am trying desparately to find season 5 of ER. I mean, I could buy it on Amazon but that would take a while to get. I need instant gratification. My husband is still gone.

I can't even talk to him. Apparently "the field" is in some sort of cell phone void. I'm not complaining. I promise. I realize that sometime very soon Brett will be gone for a LOT longer than 3 days...and I plan to really save up my crying time for then. So, yeah.

happy one month anniversary, love the army

So, today Brett and I have been married for one whole month. WOO.

The army gave us the special gift of taking away my husband for three whole days. Boo.

I think it hits me in weird waves that life is so incredibly different, and that my only real friend is my husband and he's not around very often at all...at times I get overwhelmed at the enormity of all the changes.
I want to make friends, I want to find a place in a church or something of that nature, I want to find where I fit with Brett's friends, with Brett's work, with my own work....there is so much that I feel completely at a loss about.
Last night I couldnt sleep so I was reading "Gold Cord" by Amy Carmichael and I was reminded ( strangely, because it was not in context) of a verse that God gave me when I first returned to the US from New Zealand and was faced with many of these same issues ( homesickness, friendlessness, a loss of where you fit...)
Jeremiah 17:7-8
But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.

He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit."

For some reason, I thought that just because I had done this homesickness/total newness/let's start life over business TWICE before that it would be easier this time. And maybe in some ways it is...yet, it still is incredibly real pain to miss you best friends, to want someone to watch movies with and eat pizza with, someone who knows all your back story, people who have seen you cry...
and I feel JUST as lost and directionless now as I ever did when I first arrived in New Zealand...or when I got back to Texas.

Oh, but it is easier, isnt it? It is because of verses like "He named it Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far has the LORD helped us."

How true that is...

In other news, I had my second day of coffee shop training today. It was actually way more fun than yesterday- I learned how to make drinks!!! I start my first REAL shift on monday...6:45 till 1pm. Whew! Talk about baptism by fire, huh?!

morning start

So, this morning as I was driving back from dropping Brett off at the gate ( we havent gotten my car registered yet because you cant just have the registration sticker on the car, you have to have some sort of paper too! Thanks for being difficult, Army, thanks.) at 5:45am I decided to become a morning person.
In fact, I was pretty sure I was 90% there as it was.
Criteria to being a morning person:
1. Be awake in early morning hours. ( check)
2. Speak in sentences during early morning hours, not including grunts or snarls ( check, check)
3. Actually get out of bed and do something worthwhile (check, I got up, had a quiet time and drove )
4. Be cheerful.

Yes. It was the last one that got me. I was definitely not cheerful. But, I DO think that 3 out of four isnt bad!!!

And I think I was mostly not cheerful because my stomach is upset. BOO!!! I'm blaming the chinese food, cupcakes and wine that I had last night

( dont judge, when pretty much the only person you know has been doing Arabic lessons for EIGHT HOURS STRAIGHT and you've watched TEN episodes of ER and written FIVE thank you notes...YOU'D make extra huge cupcakes and drink the last two glasses of wine while doing so, too!)

*ahem*

Today, I start my job at the coffee shop. I've been mildly surprised by some of the responses I've gotten from people about taking this job. Mostly, the ones that urge me not to take it unless I can move up to middle management really soon, and own the company by the end of the year.
HEEELLLOOOOO! Do you know me at all?! I dont WANT to own a coffee shop ( or even RUN one!!) . I want to work in one, I want to talk to the people without having to worry if the staff is getting their paychecks, or if someone paid the rent....its just like Carrie Weaver on ER. She got the head management job that she always wanted and then she hardly got to practice medicine anymore....

I cant believe I just used ER as my example...

next week=devotion to blogging.

On Friday afternoon God took very good care of my mental health by sending me two phone calls from Carmi and Thida...both a surprise. It a miracle they called when they did because Brett didnt get home until 8:30 on Friday night...and...well....that's sad.

So, anyway, this weekend has been busy and difficult at times-Brett will be gone for three days next week, out on the field ( I'm actually not even sure what this means, except that I suspect its like glorified camping and I dont get to see Brett....but who knows, my perception might be off a tad. ;-) And Brett had to spend most of yesterday working on his Arabic lessons that he needed to catch up on.

Yes, the army is taking a lot of getting use to...I mean, I guess I KNEW that it would be pretty all consuming, but I didnt really GRASP that fact fully until now.

SooOOooo...I decided to take the job at the coffee shop. I prayed about it, Brett prayed about it...and finally I just decided that the only negatives were very much on the "what if" side of things, and therefore if things DO end up not working out, I'll just quit. After all, its not like me quiting would hurt my career options. ;-)

So, I'm starting my training on Monday. I'm pretty excited about it. Hopefully, I wont be a TOTAL dork on my first day and drop too many things. ;-)

Last night, I made waffles for four boys. I even made HOMEMADE BLACKBERRY SYRUP.
It was fun to have people over, and I realized I get extreme satisfaction from feeding people. Its odd.

So, next week I've decided to make it a point to blog every day...I mean, sure, its not the same when you dont have constant internet access and therefore can blog when the mood strikes you, but I feel a great need to keep in contact with my blog readers. I've neglected you, but I will try my best to change my ways.

the gift ( card).

My parents left early this morning. I was definitely sad to see them go! I really had so much fun hanging out with them, and I better not say any more about how much I will miss getting to do that on a weekly basis, or I will definitely cry.

But, it was good to show them around my "small sphere" of my life thus far...and I look forward to a "proper" visit in the future where we'll actually DO stuff! Instead I spent a goodly part of the past two days sorting out all the wedding presents that brought in my car! whew!

After the parents left, I went to Target and Pier1 to drown my homesick sorrows in some good old fashion shopping. And boy did I buy stuff! But, you know how much it ALL cost me?! $5.25

That's right. Gift Cards are my new favorite thing.

Anywho. I've saved the juiciest piece of news till now...

An hour or so ago I got a call from the coffee house owner offering me a job ( after a short painless interview over the phone where I waxed eloquent about myself).
I'm kinda in shock about it, to be honest. Like I said in my previous post, in a lot of ways I had not "started" my life in earnest here in Washington...but I felt that after my parents left, with nothing else to look forward to from my "comfortable old life", I might as well put my head down and get at it.
But so soon!?!

The only problem with the coffee house job ( it seems pretty sweet so far. did you know that minimum wage in Washington is $7.92?! hahaha. and i get free coffee. And learn how to MAKE good coffee.) is that I would probably have to work at least one shift during the weekend ( about four hours). Brett will not like this. Neither will I. So, continue to pray that I have wisdom about what to do. Ultimately, I have said that whatever job i get shouldnt get in the way of my time with Brett...

*sigh* decisions, decisions.

In other, less complicated news... I think I'm going to bake bread this week ( with the help of my totally awesome bread maker that i got from my Aunt Janis and Uncle Mike. Woo Woo!

I also hope to FINALLY get the last touches done to the apartment ( aka. put things on the walls) so I can take my "after" pictures and blow all of you blog readers out of the water with my before and after shots. Oh the magic I have worked on this place. ;-)

no particular order.

Brett had Friday off ( which makes up a teensy bit for him working from 6 to 6 practically every day). So we were able to get me an Army ID card. I feel so powerful now. We also got me sorta/kinda signed up for health care....lots of red tape. But, I'm praying really hard right now that as my paper work goes through and I get assigned to a doctor that I get a really really good one!

We also bought dining room chairs this weekend, Brett finished the sixth Harry Potter book-so a good portion of the weekend I spent saying ( 1am) "Brett turn out the light...its late!" and reading out loud to him while he put the dining room chairs together.

We watched the Bourne Ultimatum, which I recommend because how can you NOT like Jason Bourne who is good at EVERYTHING and also doesnt like that he's a killer?! ;-)

I went blackberry picking with Katie at the park across from where we live ( I TOLD you it was a great park, but I had no idea the depths of its greatness!! we saw two baby bunnies while we walked to the blackberry patch!) and then I made a Blackberry buckle. From scratch.

*pause*

I dont want my amazing talents of going out and picking my own berries and then making something out of them to get lost in the rest of this post-so just take a moment to let that sink in....


Today I'm getting the guest room ready for my parents who should apparently be arriving from their long trek across the country to bring me my car late this afternoon!!! How exciting.

I did realize yesterday that I have been subconsciously putting off doing a lot of things until "after my parents leave" just because it seemed like thats really when things get all nitty gritty. So here's hoping that I dont flip out when I realize I've got two million thank you letter's to write and a whole life to start up once they leave. :-)

ten minute drive, all the difference

So, last night my sweet husband took me to see "No Reservations". And I got to drive.

Those seem like simple things, a movie, driving...but they really made all the difference to my sanity.

Plus all your wonderful prayers and supportive comments and emails :-)

Yes, I'm feeling a lot better today, a lot less crazy.

So, I recommend No Reservations...of course, I recommend the original "Mostly Martha" (the german movie that came out several years ago.) almost more so....and you can probably rent it for cheaper ( if you're trying to save money by not going to the movies or something)...and its in german so there's that.

But, for me, going to the movies....getting out of the apartment. made me feel like a person.

Today, I talked to Billie and Steve on the phone ( at the same time! yay!). My mother. and Amy on the phone.

So, its been a good day for the talking. Thank goodness, I was forgetting how to have conversations.

the hard part

So, its definitely starting to sink in that I dont have a life.
I think the worst part is that I have become incredibly boring.
I always felt that the one consolation, if I ever became really boring, is that I probably wouldnt know I was boring.

But, I definitely know it.

I realize that the fact that this morning I did the following:
Watched Arrested Development. Ate raspberry slice for breakfast. took off PJs, put on clothes, put on deodorant, brushed teeth, walked to mailbox...oh and the worst part is-that was from 8am till 11:30am....hours of boring behavior.

that's not even remotely interesting. I also realized that I had really reached the end of the line when I described to Brett the four articles I'd read in Vanity Fair as the most interesting thing that happened to me yesterday...



Yes, being stuck in this apartment for another week is definitely not good for my mental health. I've cried twice today. And I think the worst thing is that Brett mentioned maybe I should talk to...a girl. I feel bad for him. I can't be the most enjoyable person to be around at the moment. But, unfortunately, I dont KNOW any girls. And for some reason it seems like cheating to call up someone who's not here. I moved, didn't I? I CHOSE to not have my girlfriends around...

Incidently, I found some card stock at Albertsons ( I hate this store with a loathing passion now, because its the only place I can really walk to. every single freakin day.) so I was able to print up my resume. Maybe if I get a job I'll have something more interesting to talk about. Maybe if I get a job I'll feel like a productive member of society. Right now I feel so incredibly lame.
I think the thing I'm most tired of is me.

Even I am tired of the complaining that seems to be on a constant cycle inside my head...

Oh, hey, here's something interesting ( of course, it happened while I was on my honeymoon and during a time in my life when I was still a tiny bit of a nonbore..but whatever, I havent told the blog yet so we'll count it).

So, Brett and I were being delayed in the Bahamas airport, trying to get back to the United States and I was starting to feel odd ( which would turn into one of the most awful stomach viruses ever known to mankind) but I was ignoring it because there was nothing else to do but sit and watch Brett eat what looked like a disgusting piece of chicken in the airlounge...and as we sat I saw two incredibly skinny models sitting at a table next to us and it seemed that almost as soon as they registered on my "people I loathe" radar they hopped up and proclaimed that their flight was finally leaving. Now, it sounded like they were on our flight so I excused myself from the table to go look and see if there were any updates on our flight.
I made it to the ticket counter ( was reeeeally starting to not feel well at this point) and since there was no change in the flight information that was flashing above the counter I turned around to walk back to where Brett was...I turned around to run almost smack dab into some dude wearing a baseball cap at an odd angle who was being accosted by some women who was saying "are you an actor!?!"
And oh, yes it was...I had just so happened to have seen the movie Step Up, where Tatum Channing played the male lead much to my chagrin, and there he was in the flesh...

However, I didnt much care. Since I wasnt feeling particularly good. And besides, that movie was awful.

...

About two minutes later when Brett and I were having to run for our lives to get to our plane ( since, yes, it WAS our plane boarding, and they just hadnt changed the board) I pushed between Tatum and his female admirer without even an "excuse me"...I think that may make Tatum and I even for me spending $7.50 on his lame movie.